Betrayed&Stayed Posted February 7, 2014 Share Posted February 7, 2014 (edited) I joined this board in the hopes to learn about affairs, how they happen, and listen to other people’s stories. I have gained great insight. I still have an immense difficulty getting inside the mind of a cheater. It’s such a foreign concept for me. At least I can understand cheaters on a theoretical level. I learned that what I went through was typical. I learned that what my wife did was not unique. I have been visiting this site less and less recently. The main reason is that affairs are like John Grisham novels. The characters, setting, and plot twists are different for each storyline. But overall, it is basically the same story with the same formula. Affairs are cliché. Believing you are the exception is the rule! IRL, I know the details of three affairs. All three are cliche: My wife had an affair with her single hunky co-worker My good friend divorced his wife because she had a fling with her single younger male tennis pro A narcissistic college buddy left his wife and kids to marry his younger single sexy secretary (soul-mate) The more I read posts on here, the more they sound the same. As someone mentioned the other week it’s like the same 6 people post the same story under different usernames. I don't know if I've become bored with it or just numb. Maybe I've accepted that there are POS's out there, and cheaters are going to cheat. I think that I'm just tired of reading the same "story" over and over again. After all, I really enjoyed the first couple of John Grisham novels, but after the third or fourth one it seemed that I was reading the same story: small town lawyer versus big corporation; insert different industry; insert different small town; insert a different twist at the end. Repeat for next novel. Edited February 7, 2014 by Betrayed&Stayed 5 Link to post Share on other sites
William Posted February 7, 2014 Share Posted February 7, 2014 Is this related to your own marriage or is it a commentary on a John Grisham novel and affairs in general? If related to your own marriage, then provide the context so it can be properly placed in the Marriage and Life Partnerships forum. It appears that the posting is mostly about other posters, their postings and a book. Is that right? Link to post Share on other sites
Author Betrayed&Stayed Posted February 7, 2014 Author Share Posted February 7, 2014 It appears that the posting is mostly about other posters, their postings and a book. Is that right? Correct. An analogy I've been thinking about recently after reading posts over a period of time. Link to post Share on other sites
William Posted February 7, 2014 Share Posted February 7, 2014 Thanks! I'll move this to GRD and please continue the discussion there. Link to post Share on other sites
96nole Posted February 7, 2014 Share Posted February 7, 2014 Completely agree. The affair stories are so similar it's like all the cheaters have taken a class and learned the same lessons on how to cheat. After the class they all take an oath to cheaterdom. They raise their right hand and put their left hand on the crotch of the person sitting next to them. I've been coming here less also. A few months ago I realized I was coming here only out of force of habit. Not just this site but others as well. Link to post Share on other sites
Got it Posted February 7, 2014 Share Posted February 7, 2014 I joined this board in the hopes to learn about affairs, how they happen, and listen to other people’s stories. I have gained great insight. I still have an immense difficulty getting inside the mind of a cheater. It’s such a foreign concept for me. At least I can understand cheaters on a theoretical level. I learned that what I went through was typical. I learned that what my wife did was not unique. I have been visiting this site less and less recently. The main reason is that affairs are like John Grisham novels. The characters, setting, and plot twists are different for each storyline. But overall, it is basically the same story with the same formula. Affairs are cliché. Believing you are the exception is the rule! IRL, I know the details of three affairs. All three are cliche: My wife had an affair with her single hunky co-worker My good friend divorced his wife because she had a fling with her single younger male tennis pro A narcissistic college buddy left his wife and kids to marry his younger single sexy secretary (soul-mate) The more I read posts on here, the more they sound the same. As someone mentioned the other week it’s like the same 6 people post the same story under different usernames. I don't know if I've become bored with it or just numb. Maybe I've accepted that there are POS's out there, and cheaters are going to cheat. I think that I'm just tired of reading the same "story" over and over again. After all, I really enjoyed the first couple of John Grisham novels, but after the third or fourth one it seemed that I was reading the same story: small town lawyer versus big corporation; insert different industry; insert different small town; insert a different twist at the end. Repeat for next novel. All relationships are cliched. There are only so many story lines that they can follow. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
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