Does she want a sugardaddy?

[David]

Okay...I have a problem and I think I know what to do, but I need to hear it from others. I've been going out with this girl for a little while. She's really attractive and I find myself having a great time with her, that is until recently.

 

Her friend had introduced her to this older man who is willing to buy her lots of things and let her stay in his condo at some resort area whenever she wants... She said that she's not interested in doing these things, but something doesn't feel right to me...

 

Ironically, I actually met this guy once at a bar since he's a client of one of my friends...This was only a week or so before I started meeting this girl..And everything that I know about him including his car, age, occupation, what city he's from relates to what my girl had mentioned......Anyway, this older man bragged to me about shaggy a lot of girls and having the time of his life...

 

Yesterday she said that this older man called her and asked her out for lunch at some fancy hotel, but she didn't go because she was busy. Later in the evening she met me and told me that he probably would call her again, but she thought he would wonder why she was out... I couldn't believe what I was hearing... If she's not interested in this man and what she can get then why would she give him her number? She's been honest about this to a degree, but I think actions (giving her number) speak louder than words. I feel danger....

[Tony T]

The biggest issue is the fact that she even told you about this. The two of you are not in a committed relationship so it would seem she doesn't think very much of you or doesn't care if you think very much of her by giving you information about giving this guy her phone number.

 

There's a chance she may be trying to make you jealous, but a greater chance she is even quite stupid. Further, she may be trying to get you to ante up to see if she can get more goodies out of you than out of him.

 

I think she is just plain ignorant.

 

Lots of young girls are impressed by older men with and have absolutely no other interest in them. The older men are very stupid because they actually think they can buy the affection of these young chirpies. Well, they are able to buy their company for a period of time until the girls get tired of things and move on. These older guys actually get broken hearted over it. But there's practically no way for an older man to gain the company of a pretty young girl other than to offer material things.

 

This girl you are seeing is probably not a bad person, but just rather curious about the novelty of this. She may be flattered that an older man of means is interested in her. She may even be smitten a bit...after all, it is part of the female psyche to look for security prior to having a family.

 

In any case, this doesn't sound like a girl who is vitally interested in you for you and I would get away from her as quickly as possible unless you are willing to fully understand that, for this period of her life, she is in a user mode. And you will have to take a back seat to this dude with money, at least for a while.

[sparkle]

Hi David,

 

And I agree with you too. The most important line of your post was when you said "I feel danger....". Go with your gut feeling on this. I agree with you and with what Tony said.

 

This sounds fishy and it looks like this girl is curious to see what this guy can offer her.

 

Some words of caution: I have often accepted a guy's number even though I was not interested in him at all. Sometimes it was just easier to take it, and besides, it would be up to me if I wanted to contact this guy. But I've never given my number to a guy that I wasn't interested in (unless it was work- or school-related). A lot of my girl friends can relate with me on this.

 

I would just watch out and not let my feelings get too strong too soon for this girl. Good luck! (By the way, there are many other girls out there that don't care at all about the material things a guy has to offer them).

[Rogue]

Yup.Sounds kinda fishy to me too. If you confront her about this, she'll say you're over-reacting and that you're possesive. If you let it go, she might decide to explore her options. If you chose to end the relationship, you'd be wise to do a "pre-emptive strike" and dump her first.

 

What Tony said about younger women getting tired of older richer men is true. My buddy ,"Jack" (not his real name) had a fiance whom he was deeply in love with. But she had a thing for money. She told him one day:

 

" I love you, but I'm just the type of person who needs a lot of money.Nothing personal, but I can't marry you." .

 

She ended the engagement, and later married a man twice her age, who was quite well off. ( She was 25 ,he was over 50). This broke poor Jack's heart, because she was the one true love for him. To make matters worse, the house the guy owned was only two blocks away from where he lived, so he would often see the two of them together. It was really tough on Jack, and he confided in me that he seriously considered suicide at the time.

 

About a year after their marriage, the woman gives Jack a call. They agree to meet in his place, and she shows up wearing nothing but an overcoat. She then tries to seduce him, but he pushes her away. She then says:

 

" My husband is rich, but he can't satisfy me sexually. " .

 

Ha! Jack told her too bad for her! lol.

 

So you see, this rich older man is really a rich older fool. He just doesn't know it. How many younger women go out with poor older men? Does this guy think the girls he goes out with actually are attracted to him?

 

Don't let a fool like this ruin your relationship. If you think your girlfriend might bail out on you, dump her first. But if you can find a way to save it , go for it.

 

It's not like you don't have anything going for you. There must be a reason your gal was attracted to you in the first place. If you can find a way to make her remember those things, and a few other charming characteristics owned exclusively by you, then you can fight back. Maybe the others have better advice. Good luck.

 

( "Jack" if you're reading this, I only told the story to help this guy out. Besides, you told the story a thousand times already.)

[Laurynn]

Hi David...

 

Here's an excerpt from your post that raised my eyebrows...

 

"Yesterday she said that this older man called her and asked her out for lunch at some fancy hotel, but she didn't go because she was busy. Later in the evening she met me and told me that he probably would call her again, but she thought he would wonder why she was out..."

 

1. She told him she was BUSY? Um, why didn't she just tell the ol' coot that a) she's in a relationship and doesn't 'do lunch' with other men...b) she was not INTERESTED ????

 

2. She said he'd probably call her in the evening and would probably wonder WHY she was out....HUH??? That's a very strange thing for her to think/say. Why she give a rip's a$$ about what he'd think? and WHY would Grandpa there wonder why she was out? Does Grandpa think she has no life? Why would Grandpa even care??

 

The whole thing is sorta weird. I guess this will let you see the 'real her'.....if she's someone who can be manipulated and seduced by someone with wealth and gifts, etc. If so, you don't need a dingbat like that...do you?

 

I wonder how SHE would feel if the tables were turned, and some older woman was chasing you....and you were telling your gf all about it. Bet she'd be choked.

 

Laurynn