Nothisgirl Posted April 30, 2014 Share Posted April 30, 2014 I have had affair with married men for two years. We more became friends with benefits rather then true lovers. There was never talk about feelings, more about enjoying each other company, sharing news and sex. 3 months back i found out his wife was pregnant, he is very happy, he shared the news with me like with his best friend. I said i want to break it off since pregnancy changes everything but he talked me into staying and carrying on... Now they just had a baby scan... again, he shared the news so happily with me and I am truly happy for him but it is too much for me now to take. I want to break it but I need encouragement or some harsh words please, some reality check..? I am loosing my mind... I never wish to loose him but I think pregnancy is something that I cannot ignore. It just hurts me cause i have feeling for him... My exH had an affair while I was pregnant. We had a dday 4 weeks after our child was born. Please stop. Pregnancy DOES change everything 3 Link to post Share on other sites
whichwayisup Posted April 30, 2014 Share Posted April 30, 2014 If you really want it over then end it and don't let him manipulate you into staying. Sorry, but it really is that simple. Stick to your own boundaries since now it seems you're not comfortable having an A with him now that his wife is having their baby. Link to post Share on other sites
EverLastluv Posted April 30, 2014 Share Posted April 30, 2014 okay, this is realy happening wow. I always wonder how the wife would feel if she found out her husband having sex with another woman. That never happened to me so I dont know! But I would advise you If that was my husband, I would be very piss off. After all being a wife figure in a man life is not easy. sharing everyting together loving, caring for him when he is ill, washing his cloth, iron, making him breakfast, lunch and dinner etc If you consider yourself a decent woman you whould never ever had take him on if you know he has a wife!!!!!!!!!!!!!! when you marry is for better to worst so I guess thats the worst. Hope that your "own" man/husband never cheat HOPE THIS HELP! Link to post Share on other sites
xxoo Posted April 30, 2014 Share Posted April 30, 2014 Many years ago, I knew a young married couple. She was pregnant with their second, and he was cheating. The affair was discovered around her 7th month. She ended up going into preterm labor in the days that followed, and the baby was born premature. Think nicu, tubes, delays. I still have no idea if the affair actually caused any of this, but consider the guilt the affair partners must have felt. Don't put yourself in that position. Link to post Share on other sites
Denton2406 Posted April 30, 2014 Share Posted April 30, 2014 I had an emotional affair with a guy who I knew was married but thought wasn't happy ......same old story! He cut contact with me and I found out that his wife was pregnant all along, he cut contact when she was about 6 months pregnant. Totally messed my head up, they had the baby in Jan (I found out from facebook) and it still kills me to think about it to this day. Please don't do it, it nearly drove me over the edge :( Link to post Share on other sites
Smilecharmer Posted April 30, 2014 Share Posted April 30, 2014 The man is married with a family....you are just sex...you can get that somewhere else. He will. I feel for his wife, what a douche...don't be his accomplice one more day. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Author jesienna31 Posted April 30, 2014 Author Share Posted April 30, 2014 SO what do I do now? How do I end it? Do I talk to him, email him? How to finish it without drama, without being rude. Can I just email him or do I need to see him face to face? We work in the same building... Link to post Share on other sites
blue963 Posted April 30, 2014 Share Posted April 30, 2014 Say that you dont want to cause problems pain for your wife while she is pregnant and the child. Most of all you dont want to hurt yourself. Leave it at that. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
xxoo Posted April 30, 2014 Share Posted April 30, 2014 SO what do I do now? How do I end it? Do I talk to him, email him? How to finish it without drama, without being rude. Can I just email him or do I need to see him face to face? We work in the same building... I like blue963's wording. And it isn't rude. But don't worry about being rude when assertiveness is what is required. Be firm. He's a big boy, and he certainly isn't worrying about whose feelings he hurts. Kid gloves are not required. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
MuddyRock Posted May 1, 2014 Share Posted May 1, 2014 I would threaten to tell his wife if he doesn't respect no contact. I would bet THAT would work. Of course Im of the type that actually would tell her, poor women. What a selfish a$$ Think of how you are hurting this women and an innocent unborn child. Don't push her out of your mind. When d-days comes, and it will when someone is as douche as him, think of what will happen to YOU. He will throw you under the bus. She will lash out at you quite understandably, but with all the force pregnancy hormones bring along. Dont put yourself in this situation one more day. I don't understand why you don't want to be rude! He sure is! Link to post Share on other sites
KaliLove Posted May 1, 2014 Share Posted May 1, 2014 SO what do I do now? How do I end it? Do I talk to him, email him? How to finish it without drama, without being rude. Can I just email him or do I need to see him face to face? We work in the same building... Who cares if you're rude? He is cheating on his poor pregnant wife..you don't get much ruder than that. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
cif Posted May 1, 2014 Share Posted May 1, 2014 This is no longer working for me. I wish you the best and please keep any necessary future contact professional. Link to post Share on other sites
beach Posted May 1, 2014 Share Posted May 1, 2014 SO what do I do now? How do I end it? Do I talk to him, email him? How to finish it without drama, without being rude. Can I just email him or do I need to see him face to face? We work in the same building... Tell his wife. That ought to stop contact. If you see him - you know you'll have sex with him. No email to him - that obviously didn't work last time. It's time to get honest and allow his wife what a douche she's married to. No contact with him - only contact her. Link to post Share on other sites
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