Why do i feel betrayed....I wish I was a better gf....but im insecure....RANT

[hugznkisses21]

Wy do I feel beterayed after this weekend:

 

RANAT RANT RANT

 

Friday suppose to be with my bf.

He had plans to hang with his outta town cousin and me going up noth to see friends i dont see often.

 

His cousin cancels and says friday is better...understandable...he has a wife and daughter so he has to accomidat their needs. So i say u know what go....hes your cousin u dont see him often.

 

So sat morning since he isnt seein his cousin i ask if he wants to come up north with me.....he says he cant im leaivn later after noon and he was asked to work for his buddy for xtra cash until about 8 pm. He was sooo sorry and felt terrible...i said thats ok maybe next time ....I will see him sunday. He calls me a couple times that day and night and calls to say have a good time....i feel ripped of that that night he went out with his buddies to the bar after work...cause i feel like he shoudl have been with me...even though by the time he would have gotten up north after work it would have been 11 pm or later....i just feel ripped after hearing his night out at the abr with his friends.

 

Then my wondering mind wonders if he made up teh whole story with his cousin.....hmmm i wish i wasnt soo insecure.

 

GRRRR

[Merin]

Insecurity is a hard things to suck up and swallow sometimes..

 

Everyone has thier own little insecurities.. so don't be so hard on yourself.

 

I know it's hard sometimes to accept what you're being told, however if he hasn't given you reason to believe he is being dishonest.. then yeah, got to suck it up sometimes and let it go..

 

The most important thing here is that you see you have some issues to work out within yourself, and just knowing that will make things easier for you in finding ways to resolve them.

 

Rant away here... but for real... IF the insecurities are pretty much all you, and nothing to do with him... then swallow them down girl, and know that your boyfriend is with you, because he chooses to be

 

Good Luck

[hugznkisses21]

Thanks very much....

 

He has not given me any reason not to trust him....and still sometiems for me trust is a hard thing...we are semi long distance and see eachother once a week or so so it is something i am definatly workin on otherwise we wouldnt have lasted almost 2 years like this.

 

I think it is me.....i just am confused about insecurity or gut feeling....i think i make lyself get scared that everything is a gut feeling...when it really isnt a gut feeling its me getting worried it is....i think do ya get it...lol

 

Anyways he is wonderful....i know he is with me for a reason....he was cheated on so he doesnt tollerate it....but your right it is a hrd thing to swallow....

 

I want to be sooo good for him i really do

[hugznkisses21]

i just dont know why i feel betrayed sometimes

[Merin]

Originally posted by hugznkisses21

Thanks very much....

 

He has not given me any reason not to trust him....and still sometiems for me trust is a hard thing...we are semi long distance and see eachother once a week or so so it is something i am definatly workin on otherwise we wouldnt have lasted almost 2 years like this.

 

I think it is me.....i just am confused about insecurity or gut feeling....i think i make lyself get scared that everything is a gut feeling...when it really isnt a gut feeling its me getting worried it is....i think do ya get it...lol

 

Anyways he is wonderful....i know he is with me for a reason....he was cheated on so he doesnt tollerate it....but your right it is a hrd thing to swallow....

 

I want to be sooo good for him i really do

 

You're welcome girly

 

Trust can be hard thing to come by for a lot of people.. I have HUGE trust issues myself.. crap! LOL

 

BUT again, I really believe it is knowing what YOUR own issues are that is half the battle to finding resolution... I'm in a fairly new relationship right now, and had a lot of not so great things happen along the way before meeting this guy... as did he... as has MOST people who have ever been in a relationship...

 

The one thing that I have told my guy is I HAVE ISSUES, and HE HAS ISSUES... and I'm willing to "carry his baggage" on occasion.. but not all the time... it gets to heavy to carry around things that don't belong to you to begin with.. know what I'm saying?

 

I think you are good for your boyfriend, don't sell yourself short sweetie...

 

It's okay to feel afraid sometimes... but check yourself... and be honest with yourself when you have those fears come up... know when it's you, and when something more is going on.

[Merin]

Originally posted by hugznkisses21

i just dont know why i feel betrayed sometimes

 

Is it that you REALLY feel betrayed OR is it that you feel LET DOWN or DISAPPOINTED sometimes?

[hugznkisses21]

thanks again, u give wonderful advice.

 

I dotn know maybe im confussed....its caus ehw went out with his buddies to a bar so i feel almost as if he ditched me....cause he said he could come cause of work and then the drive....even though he should have to sit and be miserable because of that

 

weird i know sorry

[Merin]

Originally posted by hugznkisses21

thanks again, u give wonderful advice.

 

I dotn know maybe im confussed....its caus ehw went out with his buddies to a bar so i feel almost as if he ditched me....cause he said he could come cause of work and then the drive....even though he should have to sit and be miserable because of that

 

weird i know sorry

 

Again.. You're more then welcome

 

Honestly I don't think you're confused.. I think you're feeling uncertain, IF he wanted to do his deal with his friends and not be with you.. this is where insecurity takes the wheel and drives..

 

Look at it in a different way for a minute.. you were going up North to see some of YOUR friends you hadn't seen in awhile right? So would that mean that you were "Ditching him" because you wanted to see some friends? No way! Just because he went out for awhile with some of his friends doesn't mean he was ditching you..

 

He knew you were going to see your friends, he had to work and wouldn't be done till late.. so it would have been unreasonable to drive that far only to get there late and not have time to spend with you anyway.. he went out with some friends instead of going home.. he also told you about it though right? He wasn't trying to hide it.. so I think that says something...

 

REPEAT after me... "I am good enough, he is with me because he WANTS TO BE" LOL you'll be fine girl... breathe and don't trip on the small things.