Tired of being rejected

[Teraskas]

Title says it all really...

Lately, after nearly a year since my last 'date', I met someone again via OLD.

She seemed keen, even took the initiative.

In our very first conversation that day, she suggested to meet up sometime next week.

Flash forward to today. I finally meet up with her, and we go on a walk.

During this walk, we really keep a good conversation going, describing ourselves, hobbies, what we're looking for, etc.

 

Meanwhile, we enter a cafe and go for a drink.

The conversation keeps going the whole time with only 2 very short pauses.

Gentlemanly as I am, I pay the bill.

She still had something to do in her school, and thus could only stay for 2 hours.

 

As we stand at an intersection having to part 2 different ways, I bring up the subject of our 'next date'.

She then says she likes me, but there was 'no spark'.

 

At this point, I am so BEYOND tired of being rejected, it's driving me insane.

I have done everything I can to improve myself, worked significantly on my confidence, etc.

Tired of living on hope when there's no end to this in sight...

 

Where on earth are the women who KNOW what they want, and will not waste people's time there who are genuinely looking for something more ?

 

Sorry for the rant, but I just had to get this off my chest, lol...

Edited February 10, 2014 by Teraskas

[Scales]

Oh man, doesn't it also just feel the best when you pay the bill too? Then they throw the legal diclaimer "That in no makes me obligated to even look at your face at all afterwards, thanks for the free stuff." Ok Ok, thats a little too cynical, but I'm guessing all men have some experience with that.

 

Here is what happened and why you shouldn't be so down. You did pass her initial filter online, which means that you still have some hope left. You can attract women. Whatever you did or didn't do on your date tripped her rejection alarm. I have no idea what it is, and its up to you to figure it out unfortunately. Nobody can help you figure it out. Being yourself is good enough if you match all the standards women hold today. Otherwise you get filtered into the "no connection/no spark/not good enough" zone. Change is a good thing in that sense

 

I think you can meet somebody. You just need identify and change areas about yourself that are sending women away. For example, you can identify with being a gentleman around guys if you need to keep up your honorable persona, but drop it around the ladies. I'm not saying be rude obviously, but you can be overly polite which creates distance and doesn't create a spark. There is no advantage to being a white knight. none.

 

Start by identifying something you will change next time. Good luck

Title says it all really...

Lately, after nearly a since my last 'date', I met someone again via OLD.

She seemed keen, even took the initiative.

In our very first conversation that day, she suggested to meet up sometime next week.

Flash forward to today. I finally meet up with her, and we go on a walk.

During this walk, we really keep a good conversation going, describing ourselves, hobbies, what we're looking for, etc.

 

Meanwhile, we enter a cafe and go for a drink.

The conversation keeps going the whole time with only 2 very short pauses.

Gentlemanly as I am, I pay the bill.

She still had something to do in her school, and thus could only stay for 2 hours.

 

As we stand at an intersection having to part 2 different ways, I bring up the subject of our 'next date'.

She then says she likes me, but there was 'no spark'.

 

At this point, I am so BEYOND tired of being rejected, it's driving me insane.

I have done everything I can to improve myself, worked significantly on my confidence, etc.

Tired of living on hope when there's no end to this in sight...

 

Where on earth are the women who KNOW what they want, and will not waste people's time there who are genuinely looking for something more ?

 

Sorry for the rant, but I just had to get this off my chest, lol...

[HappyLove]

It's not even that you're being rejected she just didn't feel you connected for whatever reason. Especially with all the flakes online it's most likely just some stupid impossible standard they have. It's not necessarily you. Plus you've got the grass is greener syndrome online. I've stopped OLD myself. Too many games. I'd suggest you start some new hobbies, make some new friends, do some new things and meet women that way. Even your most perfect person goes through this if you stick to only online dating. You can't date online and take things personal.

[Teraskas]

Oh man, doesn't it also just feel the best when you pay the bill too? Then they throw the legal diclaimer "That in no makes me obligated to even look at your face at all afterwards, thanks for the free stuff." Ok Ok, thats a little too cynical, but I'm guessing all men have some experience with that.

 

Here is what happened and why you shouldn't be so down. You did pass her initial filter online, which means that you still have some hope left. You can attract women. Whatever you did or didn't do on your date tripped her rejection alarm. I have no idea what it is, and its up to you to figure it out unfortunately. Nobody can help you figure it out. Being yourself is good enough if you match all the standards women hold today. Otherwise you get filtered into the "no connection/no spark/not good enough" zone. Change is a good thing in that sense

 

I think you can meet somebody. You just need identify and change areas about yourself that are sending women away. For example, you can identify with being a gentleman around guys if you need to keep up your honorable persona, but drop it around the ladies. I'm not saying be rude obviously, but you can be overly polite which creates distance and doesn't create a spark. There is no advantage to being a white knight. none.

 

Start by identifying something you will change next time. Good luck

 

Meh, the bill wasn't that pricy, So I didn't really mind.

I have no idea either what tripped her rejection alarm.

She was open about her sexuality, and I did mention that I hadn't been 'intimate' with someone for at least 2 years.

All because I'm not like most guys and actually care about an emotional connection when that happens.

Is society really so shallow these days that I should be judged so harshly on that ?

 

That's just the thing, during dates I'm always the same person when I'm not on dates. I have no need for elaborate deception schemes.

 

I wish I could turn off that honourable persona, but I simply can't...I was raised this way by serious people.

Come to think of it, during the date I didn't exactly do any 'overly gentlemanly' things other than open a door just once. :/

[Teraskas]

It's not even that you're being rejected she just didn't feel you connected for whatever reason. Especially with all the flakes online it's most likely just some stupid impossible standard they have. It's not necessarily you. Plus you've got the grass is greener syndrome online. I've stopped OLD myself. Too many games. I'd suggest you start some new hobbies, make some new friends, do some new things and meet women that way. Even your most perfect person goes through this if you stick to only online dating. You can't date online and take things personal.

 

True that, perhaps this was the first real 'date where I got the 'no connection' line. Has happened plenty of times before that, when they don't even wish to have me as a friend for that matter, lol.

 

I agree, out of most people I met via OLD, 90%'s standards were outrageous, as if they were living in a fantasy world.

True, if it's not the grass is greener on the other side, it's nearly always the case that one gets sidelined because the other party is looking for someone even more perfect.

 

Truth told, I don't even know where I could meet women these days who are looking for something more serious rather than just the 'have fun' mentality.

[Iguanna]

There is nothing you can do to improve or to guarantee that one day you will meet the one woman who will want you, until this day actually comes. If you have the thought in your mind all the time that it's all your fault and if you do this and that you will find someone, you will only get obsessed for no reason. I suggest you sit back and enjoy the ride (your life) without obsessing about this matter. One day sooner or later you WILL meet someone you like and she likes you back. Won't it be better if until then you will have spent a nice time instead of becoming frustrated over and over again?

[HappyLove]

True that, perhaps this was the first real 'date where I got the 'no connection' line. Has happened plenty of times before that, when they don't even wish to have me as a friend for that matter, lol.

 

I agree, out of most people I met via OLD, 90%'s standards were outrageous, as if they were living in a fantasy world.

True, if it's not the grass is greener on the other side, it's nearly always the case that one gets sidelined because the other party is looking for someone even more perfect.

 

Truth told, I don't even know where I could meet women these days who are looking for something more serious rather than just the 'have fun' mentality.

 

Open yourself up to rejection, yes I said that. When you see a nice woman at the supermarket with no wedding ring, start a conversation ask to exchange numbers. When your getting your next coffe and there's a single woman and no ring, same thing. Start a new hobbie take a night class, learn to paint, just put yourself out there anyway you can. Will a lot of these women say no thanks, yes but that's how you get yourself out there and meet people. You have to take that chance and it will get easier to do the more you do it.

[Scales]

There is nothing you can do to improve or to guarantee that one day you will meet the one woman who will want you, until this day actually comes. If you have the thought in your mind all the time that it's all your fault and if you do this and that you will find someone, you will only get obsessed for no reason. I suggest you sit back and enjoy the ride (your life) without obsessing about this matter. One day sooner or later you WILL meet someone you like and she likes you back. Won't it be better if until then you will have spent a nice time instead of becoming frustrated over and over again?

 

I can't disagree more. I am really getting exhausted of people telling others to wait their turn in life. I wouldn't be issuing promises you can't keep either. Plenty of people here who have spent their lives meeting nobody with no solutions offered to why. OP seems like a really decent guy, looks for others, has interests, and shows empathy in a caring way. So why hasn't he been able to land a decent relationship? Does he need more time? Should he forget about women altogether and cut off his balls to take up basket weaving in order to be content in life?

 

Enjoying activities alone when you are single just causes you to think about women while you are doing those activities. Nothing can supplement being without human affection much in the same way drinking water doesn't stop you from being hungry. Don't wait or attempt to put it off. If being in a relationship is something you need to accomplish for yourself and its a goal, don't attempt to do something else to put your mind off it. Go do it, then go enjoy the things you like doing for yourself.

[winny]

Am also sick and tired.

Not so much of being rejected but of meeting crappy spineless guys who project themselves as something they are not.

 

How I deal with it?

 

I spend days solving my Rubik cube or playing word games online with strangers... on and on and on and on and on... till one day I realize, okay am done now... I can stop and go out again...

Put all my negative energy into solving something hard or defeating others in games... helps... big time

[preraph]

No point getting bitter. All you can do is be yourself, go do things you enjoy and someone may come along because you are in your element and they in theirs.

 

If it bothers you to pay, don't pay. Don't do anything expensive on a first internet date because most are going nowhere. Buy coffee or a soft drink. If you act like you're gentlemanly and don't mind spending money then attract someone and they later find out this really bothers you, that's not good. If you need to wait for commitment to feel generous, then fair enough. At least it's honest.

 

You can't make yourself attractive, really, other than dressing reasonably well and maintaining good personal hygiene. You have to use your real personality or it can't possibly work out. If you fake someone into thinking you're something you're not, they don't like the real YOU. Attractive spark is either there or it's not. Be grateful when someone bails and doesn't waste any more of your time and you hers.

 

Lastly, before you feel too sorry for yourself, consider all the many middle-aged women who can't even get rejected because all the men their age are still only looking at women 20 years younger. It could be worse. You need to relax because everyone can sense desperation and no one thinks it's attractive.

[Teraskas]

Open yourself up to rejection, yes I said that. When you see a nice woman at the supermarket with no wedding ring, start a conversation ask to exchange numbers. When your getting your next coffe and there's a single woman and no ring, same thing. Start a new hobbie take a night class, learn to paint, just put yourself out there anyway you can. Will a lot of these women say no thanks, yes but that's how you get yourself out there and meet people. You have to take that chance and it will get easier to do the more you do it.

 

Well, don't get me wrong I absolutely agree with you, but there's only so much rejection a person can take before it starts to become demoralising.

I've tried several of these things, even with female cashiers in a supermarket for example only to be let down with the same 'I have a boyfriend' line. (I didn't come across as stalkerish, just asked whether or not they were doing something that weekend / I had tickets for something and needed someone to tag along, etc.)

 

While the idea of painting amuses me, I am not the artistic type at all.

If anything, I'm much better at writing. (as a result, I was invited to an English poetry club which I couldn't possibly refuse.)

 

Regardless, I'll continue to put myself out there.

[Teraskas]

I can't disagree more. I am really getting exhausted of people telling others to wait their turn in life. I wouldn't be issuing promises you can't keep either. Plenty of people here who have spent their lives meeting nobody with no solutions offered to why. OP seems like a really decent guy, looks for others, has interests, and shows empathy in a caring way. So why hasn't he been able to land a decent relationship? Does he need more time? Should he forget about women altogether and cut off his balls to take up basket weaving in order to be content in life?

 

Enjoying activities alone when you are single just causes you to think about women while you are doing those activities. Nothing can supplement being without human affection much in the same way drinking water doesn't stop you from being hungry. Don't wait or attempt to put it off. If being in a relationship is something you need to accomplish for yourself and its a goal, don't attempt to do something else to put your mind off it. Go do it, then go enjoy the things you like doing for yourself.

 

Exactly, you nailed it.

I highly doubt more time on my end will solve anything.

In truth, given the amount of time I spent, my time should've already come by now. I know, it sounds a bit selfish, but still...

It's just that despite my age (22) I'm more serious than most males in my environment, and it isn't exactly helpful that I'm ONLY meeting women who are interested in 'having fun' rather than something with actual commitment.

 

It's ironic though, my niece stopped by this weekend to hand us her wedding invitation.

She asked me why I was still single and I more or less came up with the same explanation as I did here: Constantly running into zero commitment women, while from my side the door to commitment is more than open.

 

Don't get me wrong, I constantly try to put myself out there and participate in activities which I enjoy doing by myself.

Most notably the air rifle shooting club & poetry club come to mind.

Sure, there's human interaction, but the pool of (available) women (close to my age) is appalingly low there. :/

[HappyLove]

Well, don't get me wrong I absolutely agree with you, but there's only so much rejection a person can take before it starts to become demoralising.

I've tried several of these things, even with female cashiers in a supermarket for example only to be let down with the same 'I have a boyfriend' line. (I didn't come across as stalkerish, just asked whether or not they were doing something that weekend / I had tickets for something and needed someone to tag along, etc.)

 

While the idea of painting amuses me, I am not the artistic type at all.

If anything, I'm much better at writing. (as a result, I was invited to an English poetry club which I couldn't possibly refuse.)

 

Regardless, I'll continue to put myself out there.

 

They say if your not approaching at least one person a day, you're not trying hard enough. Asking a person you just met to an event is too awkward. You should just ask for coffe or exchange in numbers. Cashiers are at work working I wouldn't be asking them out! They may not even be allowed to accept a date from a customer. Writing sounds good you should do some things like that where you can meet a woman who like writing as well, at least you'll be having fun regardless. Good luck!

[nebulae]

You sound like a lovely person and any woman would be lucky to be with such a nice, caring guy:)

[notyouraveragebabe]

Ok, this might not be the answer you want to hear, but sometimes the truth may hurt. I rather have someone be blunt with me than not tell me anything at all.

 

I really don't know much about you, but have read your post about being rejected and not having any spark. I did the online dating stuff and if a woman is willing to go on a date with you then you obviously have something she likes. Good job, nice profile pics, hobbies etc.

 

Then you mentioned after the dates it doesn't get anywhere. Well I went on a few dates and some of the guys were so socially awkward. Just weird. I know everyone is unique and there is always someone out there for everyone, but maybe do things you like. I find when you like certain things, you're partner may be doing these things with you. For example, my co-worker likes art, she's very artistic, tattooed, like paintings. She met her bf at an art show. Their styles are similar. Their both tattooed and like to draw. Personally, that's not my thing and I wouldn't be attracted to him, but what I am trying to get at is you have to meet people with the same common grounds.

 

It's not a bad thing to be different. And you should never change to impress someone. Be yourself and if she doesn't like you then why would you want to be with someone who doesn't. Good Luck, finding love is hard. Sometimes love has to find you. Don't try so hard is my advice and if it's meant to me it'll be. Just be patient.

[emptyheart84]

I was almost in the same position as you in the summer. I went out with a girl I met on a dating site. We went out to lunch, desert afterwards, spent the day with her, watched the sunset in nyc at the riverpark. Romantic evening, Seemed like she didn't want it to end because she went on and on about her life as well. We both seem to get it on, I did not attempt to try anything on her, when it was time to go, we both hugged and said we would go out next time. I texted her a couple days later to go out and she said yes, but she totally turned me down when the day came. I felt the same way, not even an answer to why. I could understand if she wasn't interested from the beginning but why did she spend the whole day with me? Why do the same women leave us men hanging? The sad part is I feel alot more pathetic of myself, because I am picky with looks and she wasn't even the greatest looking girl. UGHHHH PATHETIC !!!!

[FitChick]

Join a book club. A male friend of mine did and said he was the only guy. A few younger women but mostly older women. BUT... he was fixed up with one of their daughters and they are still dating.

 

Otherwise take a ballroom dancing course/class because men are always in short supply. You may or may not meet your dream girl, but she could have a friend, neighbor, sister, cousin, coworker she could introduce you to.

[Teraskas]

Join a book club. A male friend of mine did and said he was the only guy. A few younger women but mostly older women. BUT... he was fixed up with one of their daughters and they are still dating.

 

Otherwise take a ballroom dancing course/class because men are always in short supply. You may or may not meet your dream girl, but she could have a friend, neighbor, sister, cousin, coworker she could introduce you to.

 

Hmm, good suggestions.

Although I've already spent a lot of time trying to find a book club but nothing seems to be around in the city, unfortunately. :/

 

Ballroom dancing sounds interesting.

My mom mentioned this one as well, but truth told I'm a terrible dancer with no feeling lol. xD

[Teraskas]

You sound like a lovely person and any woman would be lucky to be with such a nice, caring guy:)

 

Much appreciated for the kind words.

It's good to know that some women out there still appreciate such a kind of person, rather than what personal experiences have shown me.

[Teraskas]

Ok, this might not be the answer you want to hear, but sometimes the truth may hurt. I rather have someone be blunt with me than not tell me anything at all.

 

I really don't know much about you, but have read your post about being rejected and not having any spark. I did the online dating stuff and if a woman is willing to go on a date with you then you obviously have something she likes. Good job, nice profile pics, hobbies etc.

 

Then you mentioned after the dates it doesn't get anywhere. Well I went on a few dates and some of the guys were so socially awkward. Just weird. I know everyone is unique and there is always someone out there for everyone, but maybe do things you like. I find when you like certain things, you're partner may be doing these things with you. For example, my co-worker likes art, she's very artistic, tattooed, like paintings. She met her bf at an art show. Their styles are similar. Their both tattooed and like to draw. Personally, that's not my thing and I wouldn't be attracted to him, but what I am trying to get at is you have to meet people with the same common grounds.

 

It's not a bad thing to be different. And you should never change to impress someone. Be yourself and if she doesn't like you then why would you want to be with someone who doesn't. Good Luck, finding love is hard. Sometimes love has to find you. Don't try so hard is my advice and if it's meant to me it'll be. Just be patient.

 

Exactly.

I prefer to hear the truth immediately, rather than being led on.

Was kinda similar to my 1st date...after it we kept texting for nearly a month and ONLY then she admitted that she saw me as a friend, and wasn't really looking for a relationship. (Because she only got out of one like 3 months prior to that)

Yet when I offered myself in the position of a 'friend', she said she had her female friends to discuss things with.

Seriously, why bother at all then ? lol.

 

The ironic part is that with this date (the one mentioned in my OP), we had a LOT of common ground and similar interests.

Guess this is only further proof that I'm cursed as my very 1st thread here showed. :/

[czanclus]

At this point, I am so BEYOND tired of being rejected, it's driving me insane.

I have done everything I can to improve myself, worked significantly on my confidence, etc.

Tired of living on hope when there's no end to this in sight...

 

Where on earth are the women who KNOW what they want, and will not waste people's time there who are genuinely looking for something more ?

 

Sorry for the rant, but I just had to get this off my chest, lol...

 

I know the feeling exactly, only not so much in the dating realm. My gripe with rejection is more on the professional level. Here I am giving my absolute best, mentally and emotionally, I take no lunch, internet or general space-out breaks, I come to the office on time and I stay late. And all I get are perpetual (albet courteous) insinuations that while I'm a very nice and highly intelligent person, my value to the company as a source of profit is marginal. Argh! It's hard not to feel like I'm wasting my life with no gratification and feeling of usefulness, when there are people in my personal life I can be so much more useful to.

 

But with respect to your story, the woman that went on a date with you does not seem unfair or wishy-washy in any way. She gave you a chance to make an impression for two full hours, and then decided that the chemistry wasn't sufficient. I'd say that's a perfect balance. She neither fled the sight upon seeing you, nor did she drag the courting to two months of coffee dating and superficial chit chat. She seems like she knows what she wants pretty well, and isn't afraid to communicate it clearly. You just weren't that for her, and that's all there is to it.

 

Hollywood has hyped up the notion that we are all destined to find someone, and it's just a matter of time until that magic union happens. Not to pass any judgment whatsoever, but IMO huge number of people get attached for a whole host of wrong reasons. The testament to that is among other things a high divorce rate (50+% for first time weds and 75% for second/third).

 

DISPENSE WITH THE HYPE. Own your singlehood. Do not let bitterness take over. Do not settle, or if you must, be fully cognizant of the reasons for which you made that choice. (rent is cheaper paid a deux, but laundry loads get doubled or tripled, to say nothing of emotional investment that feels all too much like a duty and far too little as passion) Instead, pursue the people that move you and do not fear rejection by those people. Do not be anyone else's settlement, and pay attention to the unspoken signs that you are.

 

Ultimately - Apologize to no one for your choices. Just make sure to fully understand them.

 

Good luck, all the power.

[Teraskas]

I know the feeling exactly, only not so much in the dating realm. My gripe with rejection is more on the professional level. Here I am giving my absolute best, mentally and emotionally, I take no lunch, internet or general space-out breaks, I come to the office on time and I stay late. And all I get are perpetual (albet courteous) insinuations that while I'm a very nice and highly intelligent person, my value to the company as a source of profit is marginal. Argh! It's hard not to feel like I'm wasting my life with no gratification and feeling of usefulness, when there are people in my personal life I can be so much more useful to. (1)

 

But with respect to your story, the woman that went on a date with you does not seem unfair or wishy-washy in any way. She gave you a chance to make an impression for two full hours, and then decided that the chemistry wasn't sufficient. I'd say that's a perfect balance. She neither fled the sight upon seeing you, nor did she drag the courting to two months of coffee dating and superficial chit chat. She seems like she knows what she wants pretty well, and isn't afraid to communicate it clearly. You just weren't that for her, and that's all there is to it. (2)

 

Hollywood has hyped up the notion that we are all destined to find someone, and it's just a matter of time until that magic union happens. Not to pass any judgment whatsoever, but IMO huge number of people get attached for a whole host of wrong reasons. The testament to that is among other things a high divorce rate (50+% for first time weds and 75% for second/third). (3)

 

DISPENSE WITH THE HYPE. Own your singlehood. Do not let bitterness take over. Do not settle, or if you must, be fully cognizant of the reasons for which you made that choice. (rent is cheaper paid a deux, but laundry loads get doubled or tripled, to say nothing of emotional investment that feels all too much like a duty and far too little as passion) Instead, pursue the people that move you and do not fear rejection by those people. Do not be anyone else's settlement, and pay attention to the unspoken signs that you are. (4)

 

Ultimately - Apologize to no one for your choices. Just make sure to fully understand them. (5)

 

Good luck, all the power.

 

1)

I haven't mentioned it thus far on these boards, but make no mistake...I'm not only experiencing this in the dating realm.

College-wise as well, for teacher training I'm constantly getting bombarded by teachers saying that I don't have the required competences, despite my continued efforts to succeed.

 

2)

Sure, I got a chance to make an impression and that in itself was already an achievement to find someone who didn't flee for the hills in the 2 hours which we agreed upon.

However, quoted literally from her own mouth, she truly did not know what she was looking for.

'My life is much too busy atm, as much as I'd like to have a boyfriend, I fear that I won't have time for him when I do find someone.

Constantly busy with school, leading the uni's student club, lobbying to get support from other school's clubs, photography, etc.'

 

Plus judging from personal experience, the 'spark' is over-rated anyway. In my past 2 relationships, there was no spark.

It gradually evolved into something over time.

In addition, I can hardly tell everything about myself in 2 hours.

If I did tell them I've had cancer in the past, they would run for the hills regardless.

 

3) True that, but at this time I'm not hoping for a magic union.

I'd gladly settle for a woman who accepts me for who I am, for the person I've become after my countless battles with adversity, and has similar interests.

My parents, to this day have still been married for almost 29 years.

If I settle down with someone, it will be because of tradition, and the fact that I've made a conscious choice to be with that significant other.

 

4) I know the feeling. But atm it's so hard to remain positive, given the 100% failure rate (or countless rejections)

I've been through. Contrary to many guys these days who are unable to commit, I am ready and capable of settling. I

t's just the matter that I've not run into a woman who's looking for the same thing.

And if I have, then it's always been the 'emotionally unavailable' types who just got out of a relationship and subsequently only search for friends. I must admit that I'm terrible at reading signs, so a direct woman would be more than a welcome change.

 

It's just that after a while of trying (and not trying), both in personal and career life, one tends to forget what success feels like.

(Especially, if a girl who rejected you and claimed not to be ready for a relationship actually IS in a relationship 3 weeks later...)

Rejection starts to question oneself's confidence, and through introspection wonder if there's something that I'm doing which causes these outcomes.

 

Another thing with rejection is that the more it happens, the less one tends to care. At this point, I even wonder if I still have a heart...

5)

Never have, and never will. I don't make decisions on the spur of the moment.

I compare and meticulously go through the options presented to me, thus making the (in my opinion) best and most logical decision.

 

Best of luck to you too.

Edited February 16, 2014 by Teraskas

[nebulae]

Teraskas, I've been trying to contact you, but I'm not able to:o

[Badsingularity]

Most women feel a spark with men who posses a certain inner strength, fearlessness, or toughness. These traits can be developed over time but it takes a lot of work and facing your fears. You don't have to be a jerk to posses these traits. You can still be a good man. Developing a strong social confidence will also help.

Edited February 16, 2014 by Badsingularity

[Teraskas]

Teraskas, I've been trying to contact you, but I'm not able to:o

 

I'm not entirely sure, but I THINK you have to get around 50-60 posts, and then you unlock the ability to send PMs to people. :S

If that's not your cup of tea, I can always provide you with other contact information if you want me to.