Hopeful714 Posted February 12, 2014 Share Posted February 12, 2014 So, About 1.5 years ago, an emotionally abusive RS I was in ended. By the time it was over I was deeply depressed. I've dealt with some depression before so I figured this was just normal and I'd ride it out...but I couldn't shake this one and I felt more horrible then I ever felt in my life. Being in my mid 40's I attributed some of this to hormonal changes going on in addition to what I went through in the RS and BU. My doctor noticing my depression suggested that I take 10mgs of Citalopram and I reluctantly agreed because I had been in a funk for 10 months. I have never been on AD's before. As I read, going on these was not easy...and I slowly worked my way up to the 10 mgs. Once I reached that dose, and several weeks passed, the AD's started to work.. I was able to think clearly again, which helped me see things more clearly and resolve some of my pain as well as regain my life seeing things more positively than I had for months. I have been on these now for 9 months. Side effects are few, however I feel some are present. With feeling better now for quite a while, I would really prefer not to be on these...or this dose...forever...or much longer. But I fear the depression coming back which I feel it could, because of again, hormones, and because I have suffered this in the past. So, what I decided to do is begin to wean myself off of these to see how I feel. Over the course of several weeks now I am down to 6.25 mgs. I know you can't just stop these without horrible side effects and I don't want to experience that. I have been accomplishing this by using a pill cutter and tapering down the dose. What I would like to do is get to 5 mgs and stay there for a while and see how I feel before going down further. Luckily, I am experiencing little side effects in so far the "horrible" stuff I've read that can happen coming off of these. But, I am feeling a bit down again. I don't know if its the lowered dose, situational normal stress (work's been crazy) hormones, or just the long hard winter we are experiencing here in the mid west. I'm sure many would say...ask your doctor. And I will at my next appt in March. But for now, and because I think more opinions than just her's are helpful, I would like any opinions or advice on someone who has been in a similar situation and what to expect, and or if I am even ready to completely get off of these, or drop down and stay on the 5 mgs as I planned or what? Again, I would prefer not to be on them at all...but I don't want the depression to come back, so if I could manage it with the lowest possible dose I guess Id be ok with that. Any opinions on this? Do AD's "fix" whatever caused the depression permanently or if your prone to it does it usually come back? What to do? I don't want to be bouncing around with meds as this is the only one I take and would prefer to be drug free. Link to post Share on other sites
amaysngrace Posted February 12, 2014 Share Posted February 12, 2014 I hate pills with a passion so I understand what you're saying. I quit Effexor cold turkey despite all of the horror stories I've read online. It wasn't a big deal at all. The one thing I'd recommend is upping your daily intake of Vitamin D and taking a walk every day while weaning off the meds if you can't quit them cold turkey. I don't know if it's cold outside where you live but even a ten minute walk can go a long way to easing your depression. I'd also recommend daily meditation to help you get out of your head. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Hopeful714 Posted February 12, 2014 Author Share Posted February 12, 2014 Good point...but I am an avid exerciser, and I eat healthy. Unfortunately this hasn't helped much in alleviating the "lows" I've experienced over the years. And yes...I should and will try to make time for meditation...and will up the vit D. More comments pls! Link to post Share on other sites
amaysngrace Posted February 12, 2014 Share Posted February 12, 2014 You could ask your doctor to switch you to a mood stabilizer. I heard from one doctor that the psychiatric community is leaning towards mood stabilizers to decrease the need for antidepressants. Also just because you're active and eat right doesn't mean that you don't have a Vitamin D deficiency. Link to post Share on other sites
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