Its long , but I need alot of opinions

[Sabrina]

I been with my guy for 2 yrs..We have had some probs. But always end up back with each other..He has a problem of getting stressed over work and College..And he takes it out on me Saying he does not have time for me..And that he does still care a lot he just cant be with me..

 

Then he always realizes he misses me and the goodness lasts a while..I have not doubt that he loves me very much.He just freaks out about his feelings and tries to tell himself that he can live without me in his life.I am so lost without him.He will not talk to me. When I confront him he just says I wana be friends for a while...I totally know that we are supposed to be more..He knows it to..How can I make him feel better about being busy and keeping me too. How can I get contact with him..He might take a few days or even a few weeks to come around before he talks to me. I miss him already..How can I fix this??????/

[unnamed]

I would attempt at making a simple threat -- me or the highway.

 

I mean, you (most likely) would not mean it, but it seems to me you are getting frustrated by this. I know I would certainly be also.

 

He's playing around with you. He might be insecure, not sure of his love for you, it can be numerous things. But your best bet is to give him one final choice. You cannot have him running around on you like this, with you one moment, and gone the next, completely ignoring you.

 

For instance, my girlfriend and I are inseperable. I have tried to take breaks from her, but I always go crawling back. I just cannot stand to be without her, no matter what I am going through. Besides that, she helps me through everything, so I essentially gain nothing by leaving her.

 

Ultimately, its up to you. You can continue taking his negligence, or you can change things but threating him. Be honest, too. No woman, or man, deserves that kind of treatment.

 

Its either school or you. But, before he makes his decision, make sure you take him to see "The Family Man" with Nicolas Cage. I haven't seen it, but its about a man who leaves his girl for business. He, I think, gets to see what his life could have been like had he stayed with his girlfriend, and, of course, regrets it. That just might put things into perspective for him.

[sparkle]

Hi Sabrina,

 

Unnamed is right about everything (s)he wrote.

 

Firmly tell this guy that you will not tolerate this behavior and these mood swings any longer, Tell him if he acts like this one more time, you are moving on with your life, and leaving him behind.

 

It is important that you determinedly and clearly tell him this to remove all doubt that you might just be joking, or aren't serious.

 

He's taking you for granted. He knows he can have these major mood swings, confuse you, hurt you, leave you, and come back to you, and he knows you'll take him back with open arms each time.

 

Babies need to grow up before they should get involved in any relationships. Let him know that too. If what you say doesn't make him grow up right away and he displays this behavior again, don't beg him to talk to you. Don't take him back. Let him be on his own for a while...a long while...and he'll have plenty of time to think over his actions.

 

A couple more comments for you regarding what you wrote:

I am so lost without him.

You feeling this way might be one reason that he keeps leaving you and getting confused. You are not lost without him. You will be just fine without him. The sooner you realize that people are attracted to those who WANT them, and don't NEED them, the quicker your problems will be solved. Maybe this guy feels you're too needy and becoming attached, and so he tends to back off.

 

Anyhow, good luck!

[WGirl]

I had a relationship that was similar to this in which I was not getting what I wanted and needed. He saw me when he wanted. It was really getting to be a one way street.If he can't make time for you, forget him. I know he is busy and all but he could squeeze in time if he was serious about you. I am not saying that he may not care about you but he sounds like he is not sure of what he wants. He wants his cake and eat it too. He wants you there for when he wants or needs you but he is not fulfilling your needs. You can't neglect somebody's needs in a relationship.

I been with my guy for 2 yrs..We have had some probs. But always end up back with each other..He has a problem of getting stressed over work and College..And he takes it out on me Saying he does not have time for me..And that he does still care a lot he just cant be with me.. Then he always realizes he misses me and the goodness lasts a while..I have not doubt that he loves me very much.He just freaks out about his feelings and tries to tell himself that he can live without me in his life.I am so lost without him.He will not talk to me. When I confront him he just says I wana be friends for a while...I totally know that we are supposed to be more..He knows it to..How can I make him feel better about being busy and keeping me too. How can I get contact with him..He might take a few days or even a few weeks to come around before he talks to me. I miss him already..How can I fix this??????/