BUBS Posted February 19, 2014 Share Posted February 19, 2014 I need advice on whether or not I should consider relocation. My ex fiance and I broke up in October of 2012, and I was living with him in Texas and then came back to where I grew up in NJ after the break up. I loved living in texas because of the whether and how much less expensive it is to survive there in comparison to here, however I am conflicted about whether or not I should consider moving back on my own. Obviously one of the things I'm apprehensive about is that while Texas is a plenty large state to keep my distance from the ex, I do worry that it will ruin my progression in getting over him to even return there in general, even if I'm 10 hours away. Another concern I have is the fact that I don't really have any friends aside from my best friend who lives out in Houston which I don't want to move to, I'd like to move to Austin which is nearly 3 hours away from them, so I really wouldn't have any type of emotional support. I don't have a college degree, so job hunting before going is kind of pointless, most of the jobs I would work at would require an in person interview, as I do bar tending and work during the day as a telephone operator at an orthopedics office currently. I currently have $6000 saved up, but I know I should probably have a lot more to hold me over financially for at least 6 months and provide enough cushion. I just am conflicted. While I loved Texas, I've never lived alone, always with boyfriends, family or a friend, and I have a 70 lb dog that would prevent me in a lot of ways from getting a roommate, and personally I don't want to move across the country just to have less privacy than I already do now. My reasoning for wanting to move there is beyond me, maybe its the harsh winter here, or just a desperation for change but still with something that isn't completely unfamiliar to me. I'm about to be 25, and I just feel a strong desire to get my living in while I still have very little commitments here. I just don't know whether or not its a practical idea. I know that if I were to go and need to come back it wouldnt take too much to give up and come home with my tail between my leg in normal circumstances, but because I have a dog it would entail me needing just as much savings to be able to return and get an apartment here and job , which I don't know how I could possibly save another 6 grand in Texas. Any input would be greatly appreciated. Link to post Share on other sites
FitChick Posted February 20, 2014 Share Posted February 20, 2014 Work, save your money and do research on different states to see first of all if you want to visit for a weekend. Then after visiting a couple of places you will know better. Take the quiz at FindYourSpot.com and it will spit out a list based on how you answer some questions. Create a fake profile and email address (gmail or yahoo) because I think the places chosen for you might spam you with tourist information. I don't exactly remember. I did this a couple of years ago and I found it very interesting. Suggestions I'd never have thought of myself. Link to post Share on other sites
Author BUBS Posted February 20, 2014 Author Share Posted February 20, 2014 thank you for your advise, I took the survey and crazy thing was I got the three towns in the 24 it chose for me that I lived in in tx, small towns. It made me feel like maybe God is pushing me to go back in a way. But I'm still hesitant, I'd be leaving everything behind just to be alone. Link to post Share on other sites
FitChick Posted February 20, 2014 Share Posted February 20, 2014 Any adventurous family member or friend who wants a fresh start and would move? Job prospects are important so read the local newspaper online to see how the economy is and what rents are like. Link to post Share on other sites
Author BUBS Posted February 21, 2014 Author Share Posted February 21, 2014 I've had friends that seemed interested in the past, but they always fall through, and the last thing I'd want is to relocate and have someone back out and be stuck with even more rent for a larger place than I needed. My current boyfriend doesn't want me to go, and would probably come along, but I would hate myself for uprooting him when hes content and I think it would be a disaster. I've tried to check job prospects and they seem ok, though I have heard friends complain months in to moving that they still can't find work so it concerns me. I feel like I would need to have enough saved up to get there, survive for a few months will bills and spending and still be able to get back if it falls through. I just worry a lot more about it being worth it... leaving every one behind. When I lived there last time even with my fiance I struggled to make friends, I was raised in a small town and have known most of my friends since I was a kid, we have a bond that is a lot different than the people I met there. Plus a lot of people are put off by northerners down there from what I remember. It was hard, even having my fiance with me to keep me company. I just really want to be independent, and where I live financially I cant. Texas is a lot less expensive for me to get a lot more for my money and time, plus the weather is a lot better suited for my needs. Still I'm so aphrensive. Link to post Share on other sites
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