irc333 Posted February 21, 2014 Share Posted February 21, 2014 This post is a bit of a spin off from the "Theory : Certain personality types will never succeed with OLD" This is a theory, too, however I'm starting to see it evidenced among people as some, esp. women (and this isn't a woman bashing thread at all), that would prefer OLD over real life encounters. Is it sad that it's more of a crutch than anything if you do prefer it over real life encounters, but I've heard women ADMIT to this. Reasons include that they can "never meet men in their area that would be someone they'd be interested in remotely dating". So they jump online. They don't like "chance encounters" at the grocery stores, gym, local festivities, flea markets, car shows, Vineyards, Wine Tastings, etc. Why? Because if they don't like the guy that approaches them, they are kind of stuck being pilot to them...online, they are in control of who contacts them. They can filter those out. I think there was a woman I recall, very attractive Christian woman, to look at her you'd think she'd be spoken for or even married. She had an equivalent to what could be a female news anchorwoman quality of looks. Very athletic and very well dressed. The city she was already in what quite large as it was, but claimed she has refused men asking her out for the past 5 years and admittedly resorted to online dating as her only option. She claimed that there are no men in her church, gym, or any other social venues she is well known in her social circles that she would be interested in dating. Technology: Is it a crutch when it comes to OLD or just well suited when someone has exhausted ALL their options geographically. Link to post Share on other sites
amaysngrace Posted February 21, 2014 Share Posted February 21, 2014 I can't really comment on it because the only people that I know who do online dating are people I met online... Link to post Share on other sites
normal person Posted February 21, 2014 Share Posted February 21, 2014 I'm not sure it's a particular personality that's predisposed to OLD, I think it has a lot more to do with circumstances. The common themes of women I've met from OLD: - They're transitioning (recently got out of a relationship) and trying to step out of the box and/or maximize the search potential - They've outgrown the bar scene - They work long hours (very common in NYC) and want to search efficiently - They work with mostly gay men and don't meet many straight ones (very common for girls who work in theater, fashion, and entertainment) Link to post Share on other sites
Tayken Posted February 21, 2014 Share Posted February 21, 2014 I'm not sure it's a particular personality that's predisposed to OLD, I think it has a lot more to do with circumstances. The common themes of women I've met from OLD: - They're transitioning (recently got out of a relationship) and trying to step out of the box and/or maximize the search potential - They've outgrown the bar scene - They work long hours (very common in NYC) and want to search efficiently - They work with mostly gay men and don't meet many straight ones (very common for girls who work in theater, fashion, and entertainment) In addition: 1. Single mothers with kids 2. Gold diggers 3. Entitlement queens...thanks to their parents for raising them that way 4. unemployed 5. serial daters 6. cheaters Link to post Share on other sites
kodakgirl Posted February 21, 2014 Share Posted February 21, 2014 (edited) I definitely don't prefer OLD to meeting in real life, but there are a couple reasons I personally find it helpful: --I would like to have some "chance encounters" but I am shy and have a hard time even smiling at the guy I know is looking at me, even when I find him cute and would love for to him to approach me (I would approach myself if I wasn't so damn shy... working on it). I'm friendly and nice and can communicate interest once we're talking, just getting to that first step is almost impossible for me, and most men require at least a smile or returned look (and I don't blame them!) --I go to school and work in a field that is at least 90% women (in addition to the ones normal person mentioned, the museum field is so heavily female) --I click best with men who aren't into exactly the same things as me... but then of course that reduces the chances of meeting them in my activities or social circles --I dislike going to things that are all about socializing with strangers, ie, bars and parties (they are fine with friends sometimes, and I certainly don't mind socializing in other contexts, but JUST socializing with strangers is too much for me) So a mix of personality and circumstance for me, I guess. I'm certainly not the only woman with these traits/circumstances, so I imagine many other similar women gravitate towards OLD for similar reasons. Edited February 21, 2014 by kodakgirl Link to post Share on other sites
Disillusioned Posted February 21, 2014 Share Posted February 21, 2014 In addition: 1. Single mothers with kids 2. Gold diggers 3. Entitlement queens...thanks to their parents for raising them that way 4. unemployed 5. serial daters 6. cheaters 7. other men pretending to be women 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author irc333 Posted March 2, 2014 Author Share Posted March 2, 2014 Upon comparing Meetup to online dating, I'm finding that those of a certain agenda wouldn't do well with Meetup vs. online dating. I had spoke with a few women on dating sites about Meetup and they would say, "Yeah, I'm a member, but hadn't been to any events" or "Yeah, I've been to a couple of events, but that's about it" That's why you always see almost a 1,000 members per group, but only very few become regulars. Their agenda is more mission like. Some scope out the RSVP list and if they don't like what they see, they won't go hiking or some activity that they could enjoy for the sake of enjoying, as opposed to making it some kind of mission. So they prefer the online world over the real life world. They aren't much for fellowship, but just have a meat market mentality yes? Link to post Share on other sites
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