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With women, the "spark" needs to be there, with men...not so much?


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Something I've noticed, esp. with online dating...men are willing to attempt to give it a 2nd shot at a woman if things go well, if she's cute, they cut up, laugh, have a good time together, etc.

 

But with a woman...they'd have that same experience with a man on a first meet n greet/date, however, she's less likely to say, "He's a pretty good guy, I'll attempt to get to know him better by going out with him again".

 

Women tend not to believe in getting familiar with a man, as men are willing to give the lady quite a few go arounds with her on multiple dates.

 

True..yes...no?

 

Are men more willing to give a lady a 2nd or more so time around than a woman? I often here with women, that within minutes she just KNOWS it's "there" or not, with men...it really doesn't matter much.

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Not true.

Both scenarios might apply, to both genders.

 

Sure anything is possible, but I find that this applies to mostly women, not men.

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Oddly, I find it quite the other way. There are more threads about broken hearts from men, who thought they'd found 'the one' than women....

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Oddly, I find it quite the other way. There are more threads about broken hearts from men, who thought they'd found 'the one' than women....

 

I think that's what I meant...I mean, I think men are easily dismissed as a prospective mate in a flash, more so than women.

 

I think men are more likely to give a woman a 2nd shot at getting to know her. They aren't proponents of the 10-minute within meeting rule.

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The answer may be this question, asked at the end of the first date: "could you see yourself having sex with this person?"

 

The man probably would answer yes to that question far more often than the woman, this he is willing to try a second date.

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The answer may be this question, asked at the end of the first date: "could you see yourself having sex with this person?"

 

The man probably would answer yes to that question far more often than the woman, this he is willing to try a second date.

 

This is exactly what I was going to say.

 

A man doesn't have to feel like there's a "spark" to want sex with a woman, so, sure, he'll go out with her again if he finds her cute enough to sleep with. "Cute enough to sleep with" isn't enough for most women.

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Personally, I think the 'spark' is overrated, especially from a woman's perspective.

I didn't initially experience it with my past 2 relationships, but it developed over time. (From both sides)

I never felt the need for the spark to be there as long as she's interesting, genuinely looking for something more, is intellectually and physically attractive and all round awesome person.

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Disillusioned
The answer may be this question, asked at the end of the first date: "could you see yourself having sex with this person?"

 

The man probably would answer yes to that question far more often than the woman, this he is willing to try a second date.

 

Uhh, more like "could you see yourself merging your life with this person's life?" Just having sex with them is something that speaks to pleasure-centered people, the type who'd get their sex fix and then toss the person away like an empty beer can.

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Uhh, more like "could you see yourself merging your life with this person's life?" Just having sex with them is something that speaks to pleasure-centered people, the type who'd get their sex fix and then toss the person away like an empty beer can.

 

I'm speaking from the point of view that dating for a romantic relationship involves sex. For many women, it it easy to meet a guy who you like to spend time with, and the missing piece is finding a guy who you ALSO can imagine wanting to get naked with. If she can't imagine that piece with a guy (even if he is funny and nice), there is no point in more dates.

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TheBladeRunner

Not true for me, I need to have that spark/connection to continue forward. I don't expect this right away, but I can usually tell after the second or htird date if there's anything really there. Of course some dates are such a nightmare it only takes 15 minutes as well :lmao:.

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Read this a few days ago. Just a dumb survey posted by the daily mail but seems to prove your point.

 

 

Women take six days to end relationships but men drag it out for a MONTH | Mail Online

 

The reason for this is that, for women, a new boyfriend is just an internet click away. Women have TONS of options of good-looking, good men to date.

 

Most men don't have these options. So they hold on tighter.

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The reason for this is that, for women, a new boyfriend is just an internet click away. Women have TONS of options of good-looking, good men to date.

 

Most men don't have these options. So they hold on tighter.

 

Yeah, chances are she already has orbiters she's willing to take on after she dumps the boyfriend.

 

When a "Friend of the family" becomes the new boyfriend.

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Something I've noticed, esp. with online dating...men are willing to attempt to give it a 2nd shot at a woman if things go well, if she's cute, they cut up, laugh, have a good time together, etc.

 

But with a woman...they'd have that same experience with a man on a first meet n greet/date, however, she's less likely to say, "He's a pretty good guy, I'll attempt to get to know him better by going out with him again".

 

Women tend not to believe in getting familiar with a man, as men are willing to give the lady quite a few go arounds with her on multiple dates.

 

True..yes...no?

 

Are men more willing to give a lady a 2nd or more so time around than a woman? I often here with women, that within minutes she just KNOWS it's "there" or not, with men...it really doesn't matter much.

When I was a Lad an older gent explained to me that a Woman knows how far she is willing to go with you before you get a chance to open your mouth and it's what comes out when you do that will seal your fate with her.

 

 

You never get a 2nd chance to make a 1st impression. Once you drop a donut in the toilet you can't sell it.

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Have you ever asked women to described what they mean by "spark"? The answer is always comical i.e. BS

 

It's a word they've all jumped on to suit their naivety about what they really want

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Have you ever asked women to described what they mean by "spark"?

 

Sexual attraction. Interest in touching and kissing this person.

 

Put 20 guys in a room of equal physical attraction, and a woman might only feel spark with one. And that one may be different for each woman.

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When I was a Lad an older gent explained to me that a Woman knows how far she is willing to go with you before you get a chance to open your mouth and it's what comes out when you do that will seal your fate with her.

 

 

You never get a 2nd chance to make a 1st impression. Once you drop a donut in the toilet you can't sell it.

 

Meh, sorry, hogwash :p Not true in every case.

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I don't know a whole lot to answer your question specifically, but here's what I do know:

 

Men are biologically more physically stimulated while women are biologically more mentally stimulated. Therefore, I think women are naturally going to rely on that initial "spark" because how mentally stimulated they are, or how interested they are in you mentally, is going to determine whether you'll get another date. For men, however, we tend to be physically stimulated so it's easier to convince us for a second date if she's really attractive. Unless, of course, the date was so horrible. That's, of course, from a median standpoint.

 

For the record, this doesn't mean that men are pigs and only need an attractive woman to marry -- it just means that initially, we may be easily convinced through physical attraction than mental attraction.

 

At least that makes sense to me.

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Something I've noticed, esp. with online dating...men are willing to attempt to give it a 2nd shot at a woman if things go well, if she's cute, they cut up, laugh, have a good time together, etc.

 

But with a woman...they'd have that same experience with a man on a first meet n greet/date, however, she's less likely to say, "He's a pretty good guy, I'll attempt to get to know him better by going out with him again".

 

Women tend not to believe in getting familiar with a man, as men are willing to give the lady quite a few go arounds with her on multiple dates.

 

True..yes...no?

 

Are men more willing to give a lady a 2nd or more so time around than a woman? I often here with women, that within minutes she just KNOWS it's "there" or not, with men...it really doesn't matter much.

A resounding yes. My experiences, unfortunately. But with a small percentage of excepts women must have that spark quickly and intensely. Women often will decide if you have even a chance to sleep with them within a few seconds of meeting. If it's a no, it means it will never happen.

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When I was a Lad an older gent explained to me that a Woman knows how far she is willing to go with you before you get a chance to open your mouth and it's what comes out when you do that will seal your fate with her.

 

 

You never get a 2nd chance to make a 1st impression. Once you drop a donut in the toilet you can't sell it.

Precisely. It's unfortunate that women don't give many good guys a chance but that's the way it is.

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Sexual attraction. Interest in touching and kissing this person.

 

Put 20 guys in a room of equal physical attraction, and a woman might only feel spark with one. And that one may be different for each woman.

At most one. It's one in a hundred for some women. Once a women puts you on her not sexually attracted list, a guy has absolutely no chance to change it.

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At most one. It's one in a hundred for some women. Once a women puts you on her not sexually attracted list, a guy has absolutely no chance to change it.

As a woman, I agree, and it's really out of my control. Would anybody, man or woman, want a relationship with a person he or she were not sexually attracted to?

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