CrystalCastles Posted February 23, 2014 Share Posted February 23, 2014 How long do you have to know a person to open up about yourself to them? To provide a bit of context. There is a guy I'm interested in, a classmate. I've been talking to him at school and also on facebook. Judging by his actions and words, in person and online, he's very interested in me. Our mutual friends have noticed this as well, his change in behaviour. The reason why I think he hasn't asked me out yet is, he's a very shy guy (the first time he tried talking to me, 2 weeks ago, his hands were shaking badly and he could barely speak). I think he feels better talking to me on facebook. We're also in the midst of midterms and it's been stressful lately such that my messaging at times can be a little sporadic (we talk maybe 2 hours per day in person and on fb, he knows about my high-stress exam schedule and about my messaging and it's ok with him). Anyways, a few days ago he kind of brought up relationships and friendships and the conversation went into a direction where I felt comfortable talking about some past dating experiences and also about an issue I was having with a friend (I asked his advice). Looking back, I'm worried it was a mistake. I'm worried he thinks I'm maybe theatrical for having "spilled" my life to him and I'm worried that he'll get scared away. Am I right to think that? Is 2 weeks of talking a few hours a day enough to be at the point where I can tell a guy I like a little bit of personal stuff and not have him label me as "the chick who boarded the crazy train"? This is also a general question as well. If someone has any experiences to share with regards to the question please do. Link to post Share on other sites
theothersully Posted February 23, 2014 Share Posted February 23, 2014 The first sentence you speak to someone could be about your problem with your friend, if in context.... You are definitely over thinking it. Be yourself. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Author CrystalCastles Posted February 23, 2014 Author Share Posted February 23, 2014 The first sentence you speak to someone could be about your problem with your friend, if in context.... You are definitely over thinking it. Be yourself. Sorry what did you mean about that first part? I didn't say anything bad about said friend. It was more so, we got into an argument about something silly and I just needed some support. But I didn't speak badly about my friend at all. The guy just caught on my sad mood that evening and so I felt the need to explain myself. I just don't want to scare him away. But thank you for your reassurance, that's really helpful. Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted February 23, 2014 Share Posted February 23, 2014 Think of yourself as an onion, with lots of layers. Outside is the superficial stuff -- favorite foods, favorite colors etc. As you get deeper the more personal the issues. Link to post Share on other sites
Els Posted February 24, 2014 Share Posted February 24, 2014 I really don't think there's anything 'crazy' about what you did. Frankly, if a guy was against personal revelations of a reasonable vein (ie not calling him up at 3am crying about the ex), I wouldn't be interested in him. Part of the foundation for a potential relationship is knowing about the other person. My guy and I had many conversations of this sort before we got together. Chill. Link to post Share on other sites
Guitarisgood Posted February 24, 2014 Share Posted February 24, 2014 If he likes you, he would not care Link to post Share on other sites
gaius Posted February 24, 2014 Share Posted February 24, 2014 Good to see the facebook approach is working out Crystal. And I agree with everyone else, you have nothing to worry about. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author CrystalCastles Posted February 24, 2014 Author Share Posted February 24, 2014 Thanks for the responses guys! I'm happy to see that I haven't crossed any lines. The guy in question has been pretty quiet lately on facebook (though he still acts interested around me in person) and I was worried that it was because I opened up, but I think he's just been swamped with homework and studying, but otherwise we've been talking a few hours per day. I've also been judged unfairly with respect to my personal life, so I was worried about that too, but he doesn't seem the type. Thanks again! Link to post Share on other sites
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