Help needed... In Love with my friend...

[fmxero]

Hey all I am in need of some serious advice here. A little over 4 years ago I was at the tail end of a bad relationship when I met an amazing girl at work.

She was 16 at the time and I was 21 but we clicked and she seemed very special to me. The problem was that she had a boyfriend for the past 3 years who she seemed to care about a lot but her new feelings for me were interfering. So after about 2 weeks we finally kissed and she left her bf for me. I fell in love with her instantly not just because she was possibly the most beautiful girl I had ever met but her personality and sense of humor and everything just clicked with me. Anyway our romantic relationship lasted about 4 months and eventually it weaned off and she ended up back with her bf before me of 3 years cause I guess she was young and immature and attatched to him.

 

I was absolutely heartbroken as I felt there was something so very special about this girl. But she never let go of me completely... she would still call pretty much every day and stay in touch with me, and even hang out with me on occasion when she knew her bf wouldnt know. She didnt cheat on him with me but just didnt want him to know cause she knew he would be mad since at one point she chose me over him.

 

This continued for 2 years where we became very close as friends and I messed around with other girls but always saving the "feeling" in my heart for her... even though she is no longer mine...

 

Then finally about 7 months ago her and her bf of now 6 years broke up and she called me crying saying "I know you care about me so much..." ... explaining the break up and whatnot... Instantly she positioned herself as a girlfriend-like character in my life.. she would call me liek 3 - 4 times a day and visit me a lot and stuff... but I was afraid to make any moves in fear of losing the friendship I have with her.

 

Then she met some new guy at a club and ended up dating him for the past 5 months.... she still called me at least once every day or two when with him... but of course things weren't the same...

 

Which brings me to present day: She realized he is not what she wants and started calling me a lot again and came over my house on Christmas eve and spent the whole night up until 5 am watching movies with me and just hanging out on the couch talking and there was definite tension but I am SOOO afraid to tell her how much I am in love with her or make a move or anything. She had a great time hanging out with me that night however and from there to present day she calls me avery morning at like 10 am and 2-3 times during the day and sometimes at like 4 am... is that a normal phone call rate for someone who is just your guy "friend"... Also whenever we discuss the idea of girls who like me and stuff she has said "I dont think i like the idea of you having a girlfriend..." what does that mean? Is that a hint... are all lof the calls a hint... and actually after almost 5 years do I even have to worry about hints?

 

Is it safe for me to tell her that she means the world to me? That I love every single thing about her ... her laugh, her smile, her voice, her comebacks to my cockiness everything. Her phone calls make me feel so good it's the strangest feeling. I breathe easier when I am around her, she makes me want to be a better man... How do I tell her.. How should I tell her and is there a chance I will lose her friendship...????

[fmxero]

Anyone have ANY advice for me????

[RavenBanshee]

It seems to me, you either tell her when you you feel she is a good position emotionally or forget it and leave it as a friendship and don't take all those phone calls.

No that amount of calling isn't that normal for just friends. This would have to be killing you as I am in a similar situation.

In my situation, he knows, we're still great friends but, we want completely different things, so it just wasn't a good idea.