Couple watching: women are always better looking than men

[xxoo]

Yes I'm assuming that he feels the same way I do, just as you are assuming he feels the same way you do.

 

I just believe that my assumptions are more correct

 

A mans sexual attraction to his partner is more based on the physical than a womans is.

 

Of course there are exceptions.

 

I'm basing it on the way he describes her

 

But I agree that men are generally more focused on appearance, which is why I am not surprised if I see couples where the woman is more attractive.

[Weezy1973]

OP, there is a ton of research on this - Google "matching hypothesis" or "matching phenomenon".

 

Essentially all the research points to the vast majority of couples matching in terms of physical attractiveness and when there are discrepancies, there are usually compensating characteristics. The classic being a less attractive, but wealthy man, with a not so wealthy, younger, more attractive woman.

 

Now, might this be different in your city because you said there is a major surplus of single women, however; I highly doubt it. I think women in general don't understand what is "average" for a man. They can pick out the good looking guys fairly easily, but anything below that would be considered unattractive for a lot of women.

 

This is because overall attraction for most women takes into account much more than just the physical. Therefore an average looking guy will not really be remotely attractive to them without actually knowing if they have any of those other desirable traits. So essentially there are two tiers - good looking, and unattractive (at least in terms of pure looks of strangers).

 

What you are likely seeing are average looking couples (because the vast majority of us are average looking). Because you know nothing about the guy, to you he is nothing special. On the other hand, as many have mentioned, the woman is likely to have put in way more time, effort, and money into her physical appearance which you appreciate more. Whereas in reality - they are evenly matched.

 

And of course, lots and lots of research to back it up.

 

PS: Where do you live? Do you actually have access to the stats that say there are WAY more single women then men?

[Salvatore85]

Yes I'm assuming that he feels the same way I do, just as you are assuming he feels the same way you do.

 

I just believe that my assumptions are more correct

 

A mans sexual attraction to his partner is more based on the physical than a womans is.

 

Of course there are exceptions.

 

My ex was very fit when we got together, a few years later and she had put on some pounds, oddly enough it didn't bother me in the least. I thought she was just as sexy as the day I met her. The longer you spend with someone the less their looks matter. You're far too hung up on looks my friend.

[somedude81]

My ex was very fit when we got together, a few years later and she had put on some pounds, oddly enough it didn't bother me in the least. I thought she was just as sexy as the day I met her. The longer you spend with someone the less their looks matter. You're far too hung up on looks my friend.

How many is some pounds?

 

Do you think the woman in the pictures put on some pounds?

[Anela]

How many is some pounds?

 

Do you think the woman in the pictures put on some pounds?

 

When you marry, it's "til' death us do part" not "til' you put on weight". Before he met her, he hadn't intended to ever marry again, from what I remember. He actually loves her. You're going to age, any girlfriend you have is going to age. I don't care if her weight is the natural result of aging, or fatty, yummy food, they look happy.

[EasyHeart]

When you marry, it's "til' death us do part" not "til' you put on weight".

We really need to change this part of the wedding vow.

 

Jes sayin'.

[somedude81]

Thank goodness we're allowed to write our own vows

[regine_phalange]

Actually, where I live I see the exact oppossite all the time (thank god!). For instance, today at a cashier queue, there were two couples in front of me. The men were really handsome, and the women were average looking.

[KathyM]

Most likely, Pierce Brosnan would rather his wife be more fit. She was fit when he married her. He undoubtedly loves her and values her for her other qualities that she has, even if the physical has fallen off. I'm impressed that he stays with her and values her for her other qualities, when so many stars are primarily physically focused and would not tolerate such a weight gain in a spouse. To movie and T.V. stars and other celebrities, image is so important to them, and they often spend a lot of money to maintain that image, both on their own physical appearance and lifestyle, but on media image. Many stars would believe an unattractive spouse is a bad reflection on them, or puts them at a disadvantage somehow, and hurts their image. It's pretty refreshing to see a celebrity that stands by his wife despite all the pressure from that industry to present an elite image, and despite all the interest from more beautiful women that Pierce probably still gets.

[Woggle]

We really need to change this part of the wedding vow.

 

Jes sayin'.

 

I agree since it is clear that most people just can't honor it these days.

[somedude81]

In all honestly leaving your wife because she gained weight is pretty crappy, especially if you have kids together. From what I understand, she really put on the weight after having her two kids and was unable to lose it. And I'm very certain that they have talked about her weight many times and have tried to get her to lose it.

 

As much as I talk about looks, I won't be able to leave the future mother of my children just because she has gained a lot of weight. But my sexual attraction for her will definitely go down. All I can do is hope that it won't happen to her. Frankly, that level of weight gain is abnormal and unhealthy.

 

Keely doesn't even look like the same person in her before and after photos. From what I've read, they met on a beach in Mexico. If she was as overweight then as she is now, do you think Pierce would have married her?

[xxoo]

The pierce brosnan example illustrates our own projections. He describes his wife as the MOST beautiful woman.

 

If you see couples who don't match up in your eyes, remember that they might not see it the same way. Probably, they are together because they are in love! And they are probably very attracted to each other.

[KathyM]

If she was as overweight then as she is now, do you think Pierce would have married her?

Probably not. I'm guessing not, since he was at the height of his career then and likely had many options and opportunities to meet quality women with a lot going for them. He still does, but it's really wonderful to see a Hollywood celebrity continuing to value his spouse so much after such a weight gain. He obviously loves other things about her so much that, to him, she IS still the most beautiful woman in the world. Maybe not appearancewise, but in other ways that are important to him.

[xxoo]

According to articles, their mutual interest is eating pastas together and sharing a bottle of wine every night. Does that sound like he is wanting her to lose weight?

 

He's says his wife is beautiful as she is. Who are we to question that?

[Weezy1973]

According to articles, their mutual interest is eating pastas together and sharing a bottle of wine every night. Does that sound like he is wanting her to lose weight?

 

He's says his wife is beautiful as she is. Who are we to question that?

 

Indeed - another interesting phenomenon associated researched along with the matching hypothesis is that:

 

a) people tend to overestimate their own physical attractiveness (both men and women) and

 

b) people GREATLY overestimate the attractiveness of their partners/spouses.

 

I'm betting Pierce really does see his wife as beautiful, even if most men would not. It's that tendency to see our partners as being very attractive (even though in all likelihood they are just average) that contributes to couples staying together long term.

[SteveC80]

Im sure Pierce has his share of fun on the side

[somedude81]

According to articles, their mutual interest is eating pastas together and sharing a bottle of wine every night. Does that sound like he is wanting her to lose weight?

 

He's says his wife is beautiful as she is. Who are we to question that?

Since you don't seem to be against turning to articles

 

Pierce Brosnan's Wife Gets Fit For Her Man - Pierce Brosnan - Photos & Pics

[Eternal Sunshine]

And here is expansion on this:

 

I recently had dinner with 2 married friends in their 30s. I haven't seen them in years and I was stunned by the decline of women's appearance. They used to be attractive and stylish women and now both have gained a lot of weight, cut their hair short and wear shapeless clothes. For some reason I find this very depressing. They both also had promising careers which they left to be stay at home mums. They have just completely lost their sparkle.

 

Which brings me to another point. I am going through all this hassle of dating men to maybe, possibly, if I am lucky get to the stage that my friends are?

 

No thanks, I am keeping my cat and a gym membership. I would never want to live their lives.

[thefooloftheyear]

And here is expansion on this:

 

I recently had dinner with 2 married friends in their 30s. I haven't seen them in years and I was stunned by the decline of women's appearance. They used to be attractive and stylish women and now both have gained a lot of weight, cut their hair short and wear shapeless clothes. For some reason I find this very depressing. They both also had promising careers which they left to be stay at home mums. They have just completely lost their sparkle.

 

Which brings me to another point. I am going through all this hassle of dating men to maybe, possibly, if I am lucky get to the stage that my friends are?

 

No thanks, I am keeping my cat and a gym membership. I would never want to live their lives.

 

Maybe they had kids.???

 

Not all women fall apart....in fact a large percentage of the women around here look absolutely great-even with a gang of kids. Its a ridiculous statement to think all women are like that...

 

In fairness to all of the moms out there, its NOT easy to be sexy and hot, when you passed a couple of klds out of your body and they are running you ragged..

 

TFY

[topaMAXX]

And here is expansion on this:

 

I recently had dinner with 2 married friends in their 30s. I haven't seen them in years and I was stunned by the decline of women's appearance. They used to be attractive and stylish women and now both have gained a lot of weight, cut their hair short and wear shapeless clothes. For some reason I find this very depressing. They both also had promising careers which they left to be stay at home mums. They have just completely lost their sparkle.

 

Which brings me to another point. I am going through all this hassle of dating men to maybe, possibly, if I am lucky get to the stage that my friends are?

 

No thanks, I am keeping my cat and a gym membership. I would never want to live their lives.

 

You could be married, have kids, and still go to the gym.

 

If they fell apart looks-wise, that was their own choice. They could have made different choices. I know plenty of women with a husband and kids that are still attractive.

[Els]

 

a) people tend to overestimate their own physical attractiveness (both men and women) and

 

Not sure about this; I think equal numbers of people overestimate and underestimate their physical attractiveness. It's even hard to know which is which, since attractiveness is so subjective - even photos don't tell the whole story. A huge part of it is how they act, talk, etc, in which many other factors play a part.

 

b) people GREATLY overestimate the attractiveness of their partners/spouses.

 

I'm betting Pierce really does see his wife as beautiful, even if most men would not. It's that tendency to see our partners as being very attractive (even though in all likelihood they are just average) that contributes to couples staying together long term.

 

I definitely agree with this. When we're in love with someone, the rose-tinted glasses magically transform them from average guy/girl to amazing.

[gaius]

I don't think base attraction has nearly as much to do with looks as we like to believe. Most guys just don't have the balls Pierce Brosnan does to be with a woman in that condition if they find themselves attracted. They actually value more what other people think of her. How sad is that? Guys getting off on a woman because of what other people think.

[thefooloftheyear]

I don't think base attraction has nearly as much to do with looks as we like to believe. Most guys just don't have the balls Pierce Brosnan does to be with a woman in that condition if they find themselves attracted. They actually value more what other people think of her. How sad is that? Guys getting off on a woman because of what other people think.

 

Good point....I mean he did have that thing with Sally Field long after her cute looks went bye-bye.....Oh wait....that was just a movie...scratch that..

 

TFY

[newmoon]

don't women just take care with their appearance significantly more than men? I think the women will generally always look better than the partner because we're hard-wired to look presentable when out and about

[thefooloftheyear]

don't women just take care with their appearance significantly more than men? I think the women will generally always look better than the partner because we're hard-wired to look presentable when out and about

 

I dunno...I see your point. But while I am no metrosexual I take good care of myself, always wear proper fitting clothes, am clean and smell good, etc..Not all guys are slobs..

 

TFY