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Posted (edited)

What I don't understand is this: there are so many guys on there who are super-successful businessmen. Why wouldn't they date / pay for an escort?

If you ignore all incoming messages that include below the waist pictures etc., chances are good that you will meet a handsome, in control, financially extremely secure man who is very well dressed and has a large house, and a beautiful car, wife and children.

 

Those guys actually have class! (if you ignore the fact that they cheat, and do a lot of deceiving and planning in order to do so successfully)

 

I don't understand that. Please explain. Yes, they're still cheaters and in it for the sex (mostly), but they could get it elsewhere, in better quality, or am I wrong? Why spend that money there, rather than for paid sex?

I really really expected low-class douchebags. They are on there, too, sure, but the ones you actually choose to communicate with (if you're halfway sane)......USUALLY turn out to be way out of your league (money-wise, and career-wise, education-wise, and even looks-wise). It's intimidating and I am not exaggerating. I am personally used to being out of guys' leagues, but here, in all honesty, on AM it's the other way round.....I feel quite inferior.

Edited by Minnie09
Posted

I went on there to have my own affair after my wife had one. It wasn't a brilliant idea but I digress.

 

First, it wasn't illegal.

 

Second, it wasn't expensive. I would imagine an ongoing escort would be pricey. On AM, you could find a basically free NSA relationship.

 

Third, a bit less chance of STDs from a married woman (although her presence on AM isn't exactly reassuring). Still, it still seemed safer than a professional. In my case, I was the fifth man she'd been with in her life.

 

Fourth, I had no idea how to procure an escort. I feared a bad, and expensive situation. Setting up an online profile and being selective made me feel much more in control and seemed less risky.

 

Fifth, my situation was meant to be very temporary. I didn't want a single girl because of the risk of attachment.

 

Sixth, I suppose that I felt there was a higher chance of enthusiasm from a woman seeking sex, rather than one just being paid for it.

 

Seventh, I didn't like the idea of supporting prostitution whether it be forced by a pimp or the woman's circumstances. I don't judge them; you just never know.

 

Ultimately, it was a bunch of twisted logic that lead me to that place. Regardless of their image, those guys aren't "classy." They're broken and you shouod get the eff off of there. Don't participate in betrayal. Find a single man via traditional on-line dating. You don't need this trouble.

  • Like 12
Posted

Just because they wear a suit and have money doesn't make them classy.

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  • Author
Posted

Thanks for the insight, bh!

Woggle I know that. Let's call it status then, instead of class.

Posted

Honestly, I don't know how the creators of AM sleep at night.

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Posted
Honestly, I don't know how the creators of AM sleep at night.

 

 

 

Or I Jane! Having listened to their nauseating and obviously deeply entrenched excuses on British TV, for raking in an extraordinary amount of money in an industry hell bent on facilitating the prospective misery of others.

 

 

Yes yes, that's what I said, the 'prospective' misery of others. What, Ashley Madison subscribers don't get found out either????

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Posted
Honestly, I don't know how the creators of AM sleep at night.

 

They just don't care as long as they get theirs. That is sadly the way the world is going these days.

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Posted

I was disgusted when I first heard the commercials years ago.

 

Obviously it's always an "option" to cheat. But to advertise it in such a casual manner is just horrible.

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Posted
Honestly, I don't know how the creators of AM sleep at night.

 

 

 

 

 

I've often wondered this myself over the years :(.

Posted
Honestly, I don't know how the creators of AM sleep at night.

 

There's a profitable market for their service which is why more players are in this same space competing for those dollars.

Posted

The fact that a site like this is somewhat mainstream shows why some people just have no faith in marriage anymore. When marriage is treated like this how can you blame single people for being cynical about it?

 

I also don't get how people have the nerve to blame gays for the state of marriage. They treat it a whole lot better then most heterosexuals do but that is another topic.

  • Like 2
Posted

People are going to cheat whether ashley madison is around or not. If two consenting adults want to have sex who are they to judge.

 

I think a lot of guys actually are looking for some sort of connection with a woman. With a prostitute there's nothing real whatsoever which isn't sexy at all, no matter how good she looks.

  • Like 2
Posted (edited)

You are correct: People WILL ALWAYS cheat. However, sites like AM make it easier. Individuals on the fence with this issue, due to marriage problems, may take the infidelity leap because these sites make it less difficult. It's glorifying betrayal and tempting people who might have put the work into repairing their partnership to stray. Isn't AM's tagline: Life's too short NOT to have an affair? I don't think as a society we should be encouraging this.

Edited by Training Revelations
  • Like 4
Posted
Honestly, I don't know how the creators of AM sleep at night.

 

To quote a simpsons character....they sleep at night on big pile of money with many beautiful women. lol.

Personally I was surprised it was such a hit. I get that lots of people cheat but I thought they could do that on regular dating sites as well (but probably having to lie). I guess with AM, pics are not displayed, so you wont see your husband/wife on there by browsing profiles. I read an article in a magazine that was written by a female journo who did a story on it. She was a reasonably attractive mid 30s woman - She got over 2000 different guys contacting her the first month. Lots of horny cheating men on there. Probably a **** M-F ratio on there for the guys but great for the women. I thought there would be a mixed bag of guys on there, and am a little surprised with what the OP found.

 

AM was advertising on tv where I live for a while which I thought was really tacky promoting infidelity into people's lounge-rooms via the mass media. It would be great if the wives or son in laws of the network bosses decided to support that particular sponsor.

Posted (edited)
You are correct: People WILL ALWAYS cheat. However, sites like AM make it easier. Individuals on the fence with this issue, due to marriage problems, may take the infidelity leap because these sites make it less difficult. It's glorifying betrayal and tempting people who might have put the work into repairing their partnership to stray. Isn't AM's tagline: Life's too short NOT to have an affair? I don't think as a society we should be encouraging this.

Cheating is pretty well inundated in the culture already. Tony Soprano had a new mistress every season almost. How many women is Don Draper up to now? And those are two of the most critically acclaimed shows out there. Even Dexter cheated on Rita once. I might agree with that argument if Ashley Madison was the only one talking about it but they certainly aren't. And I don't think a tagline in a commercial is going to decide whether someone deals with problems by cheating or not. That's generally a personality development made early in childhood.

 

All the guys who are on Ashley madison were on match pretending they weren't married, wasting the time of women who weren't looking for that. It's not any easier, just more honest.

Edited by gaius
  • Like 1
  • Author
Posted
To quote a simpsons character....they sleep at night on big pile of money with many beautiful women. lol.

Personally I was surprised it was such a hit. I get that lots of people cheat but I thought they could do that on regular dating sites as well (but probably having to lie). I guess with AM, pics are not displayed, so you wont see your husband/wife on there by browsing profiles. I read an article in a magazine that was written by a female journo who did a story on it. She was a reasonably attractive mid 30s woman - She got over 2000 different guys contacting her the first month. Lots of horny cheating men on there. Probably a **** M-F ratio on there for the guys but great for the women. I thought there would be a mixed bag of guys on there, and am a little surprised with what the OP found.

 

AM was advertising on tv where I live for a while which I thought was really tacky promoting infidelity into people's lounge-rooms via the mass media. It would be great if the wives or son in laws of the network bosses decided to support that particular sponsor.

 

 

There IS a mixed bag of guys, but if you compare it to other, traditional, regular dating sites, the average guy on AM has a much higher income, is more sophisticated, educated and classy (sorry). That was a surprise to me as well. Didn't expect that. I've found university professors, company owners, executives, pilots, doctors, lawyers, ...... The list goes on. Of course you find your average loser on there, tattooed all over and with poor spelling, who sends what's up and how R U messages, and **** pics, but those are almost outweighed by the more sophisticated ones. That never happens to me on traditional dating sites! The percentage of "desirable" men on Match/okc/pof is maybe 15%, on AM these guys are way more frequent. And by desirable I mean status-wise. I know they're cheaters and hence not to be categorized as "desirable" in the first place. It's just odd. Successful men are maybe more entitled? Or can't get enough of anything, including women?

Posted
You are correct: People WILL ALWAYS cheat. However, sites like AM make it easier. Individuals on the fence with this issue, due to marriage problems, may take the infidelity leap because these sites make it less difficult. It's glorifying betrayal and tempting people who might have put the work into repairing their partnership to stray. Isn't AM's tagline: Life's too short NOT to have an affair? I don't think as a society we should be encouraging this.

 

The issue is not temptation. The issue is that people give in to temptation so easily these days. It reflects our the superficiality and need for instant gratification of our declining society.

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Posted

Hang on, this site runs adverts on tv?

I assume in the US as i have never seen anything like that advertised on UK tv.

 

Is the state of marriage that bad in the US?

Posted
Hang on, this site runs adverts on tv?

I assume in the US as i have never seen anything like that advertised on UK tv.

 

Is the state of marriage that bad in the US?

 

The state of MORALITY is that bad in the US

 

But as long as we all FEEEEEEL good that's what counts

Posted
Hang on, this site runs adverts on tv?

I assume in the US as i have never seen anything like that advertised on UK tv.

 

Is the state of marriage that bad in the US?

 

 

 

 

Not to my knowledge Kenneth, the man and woman who set up the site were interviewed on TV here quite some time ago.

 

 

It was all so surreal!

Posted

When I said I saw them on TV it was in Australia. (not during prime/family time). Someone coming out of hibernation from a 100 yrs ago would be gob smacked at what they see on tv and the www today. lol

  • Like 1
Posted
People are going to cheat whether ashley madison is around or not. If two consenting adults want to have sex who are they to judge.

 

I think a lot of guys actually are looking for some sort of connection with a woman. With a prostitute there's nothing real whatsoever which isn't sexy at all, no matter how good she looks.

 

This^^^

 

 

TFY

  • Like 1
Posted
People are going to cheat whether ashley madison is around or not. If two consenting adults want to have sex who are they to judge.

 

I think a lot of guys actually are looking for some sort of connection with a woman. With a prostitute there's nothing real whatsoever which isn't sexy at all, no matter how good she looks.

 

Who is they?

 

People will always do anything they want: murder, rape, cheat, lie, you name it...we can ALL judge them lol, we also needn't make it easier.

 

I don't care to patrol people's cheating but I wouldn't try to make money off of it. John and Jane can cheat if they want, I'm not standing in their way but I sure won't roll out the red carpet and get them to pay me to help them.:rolleyes:

  • Like 1
Posted

Minnie, can I ask, why are you on Ash…Mad?

Posted
What I don't understand is this: there are so many guys on there who are super-successful businessmen. Why wouldn't they date / pay for an escort?

 

Compared to buying a prostitute, this is exciting. Stimulating. A bit dangerous. Some guys like that.

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