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and just about tired


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he answers sometimes only because he may be sleep
This may be true or not. Fact is... you don't know for sure. He may turn the vibe and sound off when he's at home, because he cannot answer, whether he wanted to or not. He might switch the phone off. Or - as you said - he might be sleeping. He might have a wife, or a girlfriend, or children.

 

You'd get a lot of those answers if you got a report on him. Several websites offer that service. They can get information on criminal records, residence changes, family, etc.

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Im 26 and he is 31

 

You shouldn't be giving a stranger your home address. It's not wise. He may pay you an unexpected visit. Just because it's off the internet does not mean you shouldn't practice common sense and protect yourself!

 

I met my bf online a year and 1/2 ago and it took me a while before I gave him my #, let alone my home address. BE SAFE. ALWAYS!

 

He isn't even getting on cam, he isn't being opened with you. That's a red flag. I'm not really a cam type of person but I still got on cam when he requested, we Face Time sometimes and I send pictures often. If he isn't willing to make that measly sacrifice then he's got something to hide. My suspicion is he isn't who he has projected himself to be. You're being fooled.

 

Also, stop accepting money from this man. Pay your own rent. The more money you take from this 'stranger' the more he'll think you 'owe' him. You two aren't serious until you two actually meet face-to-face, otherwise, this is a La La Land 'relationship.' If he's clamming up to you then he isn't being opened. He's hiding something and it would be smart of you to back away, asap!

Edited by ThisGal
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nomadic_butterfly
I think you should have a deadline for meeting and if he still makes excuses then stop contact. Or cut your losses and walk away now.

 

Wishing you the best whatever happens :)

 

This. If you read some of my threads, you will see I met a man online and we also met on a "Christian" site. After months of back and forth and excuses, just like HOH has suggested, I got fed up and requested a deadline for us to meet. This showed him I was serious and it was then he knew he had to put his shoulders to the wheel or his gig was up. A day before the deadline to get a ticket, he came up with some excuse. The amount we had in common seemed to be more than anyone I had ever met; for all I know it was all a facade. Very common with OLD.

 

However, the difference is no way I'd put high expectations, let alone any sort of relationship titles on someone I had never met in person. I usually can tell beforehand if it will translate to real life, but sometimes that translation ends up being just friendship. If he truly is serious about your "relationship" he would make some kind of effort.

 

I'd also be a bit leery of a man who can afford to pay my rent, yet have ad infinitum excuses for a simple meet. Surely that's cheaper than paying rent several times? It just seems suspicious and silly to say, for example, here's $700 for your rent, but I wont spend that same amount to actually meet you. There seems to be holes in this story.

 

Just don't be one of those Christian woman willing to settle for anything just to be married or have a man by a certain age or whatever. Wisdom is a principal thing.

Edited by nomadic_butterfly
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