Men Who Disappear

[JourneyLady]

yeah, these threads are getting very tiresome and very hard to read. the stupidity of some women really bugs me. but whatever. perhaps it's just an indication of how desperate women really are to hear nice things from a guy and feel like someone actually likes them? when you're taken for granted, dumped, not in a relationship for long periods, of have self-esteem issues you make yourself very easy prey for these guys that sweet-talk you. it's so easy to fall for that when you don't have yourself in the right place. so the blame imo goes to the women for accepting so easily what the guys dish out.

 

Well some of us can't help being a little stupid when we married the first guy that laid us, and then not too far down the road married someone else we slept with early on (and stayed that way for three decades). I mean, those of us with that kind of history that get tossed away later don't get to learn how easily men can fake relationship...

 

We just TRUST because up to NOW, we never had a reason not to. Plus if we're really into the guy, we might miss warning signs if we're not actually looking for them.

 

I've only actually had it happen once that I slept with the guy... *I* bailed because I found his profile still on another site. I've never actually had it happen that they disappear after sleeping with me. Somehow I don't believe he would have just disappeared (since he took me home and intro'd me to his grown son) ... but I didn't want to be with him not trusting him anymore. It might have gone differently if it was a full time relationship though.

[Tayken]

I learnt this after the two instances when a man disappeared.

 

I felt my dignity drop each time:lmao:

 

 

....I mean, they ARE NOT INTO YOU since they disappeared. You present yourself as " looking for answers" and hence "caring" and "thinking" about them, when they sure as hell aren't thinking about you!

 

It looks pathetic and I vow to never do it again.

 

 

Well...you did say this above...

 

Well I was admittedly stupid at one stage. After two guys disappearing I felt the need to ensure that a guy was DEFINATELY into me, for real haha, before spreading my legs for them:sick:

[Smthn_Like_Olivia]

If you have a sensitive heart and think sex means something then by all means don't have sex before the promise of an exclusive relationship.

 

If on the other end, you are a woman that don't equate sex to love then sex on a 1st date or on the 10th date makes no difference.

 

I have sex early. I'm older, I've been around, I know sex is not a commitment, it doesn't even mean the guy likes me. If I don't hear from him after that then *meh*, at least I have not invested any feelings in him. I would never be heart broken over a man I saw twice and had sex with on second date. I guard my heart much more then I guard my.......

 

To me sex compatibility is extremely important, that is why I'm quick to test it. If we don't fit in bed then I am not interested in a relationship with the person. I am sorry, I am not investing 1-2-3 months in a man that will turned out to have a micro-d1ck, doesn't do oral, and has huge hick-ups about sex.

 

The problem with the ladies is they don't respect their own wants and needs. If you know you will get hurt if a guy bails after sex then respect your emotional needs/wants and don't DO IT.

 

Gaeta and I are on the same page damn it!!

[melell]

I say wait.

 

I honestly haven't run into this problem, but I haven't slept with anyone before being in an exclusive relationship- I am talking 3 months+ down the track.

 

Not at all because of any rules or anything, but just because personally I am not highly sexed, and kinda anxious at the idea of sleeping with strangers. I don't at all judge others for being intimate sooner, there have been times where I wished I was able to do so.

 

I have several friends who have dealt with the 'pump and dump' scenario, even after waiting weeks, happens time and time again,I get what you are saying op.

 

My waiting to be in a relationship first does make it a lot less likely to be used. Sexual chemistry is there prior to actually having sex too. I think if being used it a real concern for someone then if possible they should wait for the relationship first.

[Vyliss]

Women need to separate sex from making love. Sex in itself should be enjoyed by BOTH parties. A lot of women make it sound like you're giving up something by having sex with him, when you are also enjoying the act itself.

 

This is what men do. Their bodies drive them to have sex but a lot of women put up this barrier and demand commitment first, so they have to lie to get it.

 

If you just separate the act of sex into an isolated fun activity without feelings attached, you can just enjoy it for what it is (like going bowling or something), just use protection.

 

But if you can't, then don't do anything below the waist until you're both sure you're going to have an ongoing relationship.

 

A lot of guys assume if you're willing to do oral then you will also have sex. So don't do anything other than kissing if you're not ready for that.

[thefooloftheyear]

Its never nice or polite for a man(or woman) to "pump and dump"...but there are a lot of instances where women become very clingy and needy after this event and wind up scaring the guy off..I guess the one good thing about the disappearing act is that he is at least not going to string you along for months just because he's getting laid..

 

As others have stated, its always best to wait and see where its going before making the move..If you know that you cant handle the potential for it to go south, then just be patient..Most guys who arent pigs will respect that ...

 

TFY

[Emilia]

I have sex early. I'm older, I've been around, I know sex is not a commitment, it doesn't even mean the guy likes me. If I don't hear from him after that then *meh*, at least I have not invested any feelings in him. I would never be heart broken over a man I saw twice and had sex with on second date. I guard my heart much more then I guard my.......

 

To me sex compatibility is extremely important, that is why I'm quick to test it. If we don't fit in bed then I am not interested in a relationship with the person. I am sorry, I am not investing 1-2-3 months in a man that will turned out to have a micro-d1ck, doesn't do oral, and has huge hick-ups about sex.

I could have written this. Don't advocate it as a solution for everyone but once you had 'dated' properly a man for a month, investing in him, only to find out any of those apply.... you won't do it again.

 

Early sex flushes out the issues, those issues can manifest in many ways. Better to find out early before you are invested. Works for me but it doesn't work for everyone.

[Bruce Leigh]

Early sex flushes out the issues, those issues can manifest in many ways. Better to find out early before you are invested. Works for me but it doesn't work for everyone.

 

Could not agree more, had sex with a few women who would just lay there like a dead fish. I have been one of those men who disappears.

[Revolver]

Getting pumped and dumped like that is 9/10 a result of going after men who are out of your league

[thefooloftheyear]

Could not agree more, had sex with a few women who would just lay there like a dead fish. I have been one of those men who disappears.

 

The difference is that if you are a man and dump a woman because she doesnt do anal, her crotch stinks, or you cant bounce a quarter off her belly, then you are a mean and insensitive prick...When women do it, they are just making sure "their needs are met"....

 

TFY

[oldshirt]

I think much of the situations you are talking about is women getting a hormone rush of sexual attraction and so they are hearing what they want to hear and seeing what they want to see to justify to themselves jumping into bed.

 

 

Then after they realize they've been pumped and dumped, then they start seeing the writing on the wall realize they were being told what they wanted to hear.

 

 

The male equivalent of this would be some guy being really sexually attracted to a stripper. He knows she's a stripper and he knows she suppliments her income giving blow jobs in restroom and in the parking lot but she very pretty and very sexy.

 

 

The stripper starts batting her eyes at him and telling him that he is better and nicer than all the other guys that put money down her G-string and that she wants to go straight and live a nice traditional life of a white picket fence and 2.2 kids and a loving husband that comes home at the end of the day and kisses her and asks how her day went.

 

 

The guys wants to believe her and he is so attracted to beauty and sexuality he believes her words and believes her when she says she's going to be all his but she still has a few bills to pay and so she needs to keep going to the club and keep giving BJs in the parking lot for just a little while longer. She tells him she'll be faithful and a good wife to him "some day" and he just needs to trust her and have faith in her.

 

 

.....and he needs to keep paying her rent and maybe help with her car payment and maybe pick up a load of groceries or two to help with her expenses so she can start cutting back on the BJs.

 

 

This is no different from a playa' telling a woman there is something special about her and that he can see himself getting serious with her but he isn't ready to commit to anything yet but if she can keep fcking him and fcking him well enough, then maybe he can get things broke off from his other women in a shorter period of time.

[Smthn_Like_Olivia]

The difference is that if you are a man and dump a woman because she doesnt do anal, her crotch stinks, or you cant bounce a quarter off her belly, then you are a mean and insensitive prick...When women do it, they are just making sure "their needs are met"....

 

TFY

 

I am definitely one that recognizes this side of the fence from a man's viewpoint. Mostly because I've talked to a lot of guys that have expressed similar reasons for why they didn't continue pursuing certain women. The problem is that they don't want to tell a woman that she smelled bad, wasn't good in bed, or that the physical connection wasn't there. So they just fall off the map, even though they were in constant communication before having sex, and the woman ends up thinking they were just used for sex. We all have our deal breakers and sexual compatibility is very important to me. Would I be able to tell a man that his penis is just too small or that he couldn't find his way around a vagina with a map? Probably not. But I would tell him that I just didn't think we were a match instead of just disappearing. I think a lot of men just find the avoidance approach easier than having to deal with the conversation that follows.

[oldshirt]

If you have a sensitive heart and think sex means something then by all means don't have sex before the promise of an exclusive relationship.

 

If on the other end, you are a woman that don't equate sex to love then sex on a 1st date or on the 10th date makes no difference.

 

I have sex early. I'm older, I've been around, I know sex is not a commitment, it doesn't even mean the guy likes me. If I don't hear from him after that then *meh*, at least I have not invested any feelings in him. I would never be heart broken over a man I saw twice and had sex with on second date. I guard my heart much more then I guard my.......

 

To me sex compatibility is extremely important, that is why I'm quick to test it. If we don't fit in bed then I am not interested in a relationship with the person. I am sorry, I am not investing 1-2-3 months in a man that will turned out to have a micro-d1ck, doesn't do oral, and has huge hick-ups about sex.

 

The problem with the ladies is they don't respect their own wants and needs. If you know you will get hurt if a guy bails after sex then respect your emotional needs/wants and don't DO IT.

 

 

 

 

 

And I think some of this is taking place on the man's side too. I've had this happen as a guy. I started dating a gal once that I thought was a real catch (and in many ways she was) and that she could be "the one". I was determined not to be a horndog and not to be "that guy" and so we mutually waited to develop the friendship and relationship before going all the way. (we did do other things like heavy makeouts, oral, manual etc)

 

 

When we finally did reach the point of full contact (3 months) it. was. awful. She was warm and cuddly and quite pretty but a total dud in bed :-(

 

 

we were not sexually compatible and sexual compatability is very important to me.

 

 

Now if you are thinking I pumped and dumped her, I did not. We continued dating for over a year as I tried to get things more sexually compatible. After about a year and a half, I met my current wife and in weeks I realized what I had been missing all this time. When I experienced sexual compatability and passion again, I knew I couldn't keep chasing that windmill with my other GF and we split up.

 

 

Within about 9 months of us splitting up, my now wife and I were engaged, and my old GF and her future husband were engaged and living together.

 

 

So what I am saying with my long post, is pump and dumps are not always the result of someone being underhanded and unscrupulous. Sometimes it's just a near miss.

 

 

Some times someone may be sincere in their interest but once they've been there, they just realize the compatibility just isn't there.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Now if

[oldshirt]

I am definitely one that recognizes this side of the fence from a man's viewpoint. Mostly because I've talked to a lot of guys that have expressed similar reasons for why they didn't continue pursuing certain women. The problem is that they don't want to tell a woman that she smelled bad, wasn't good in bed, or that the physical connection wasn't there. So they just fall off the map, even though they were in constant communication before having sex, and the woman ends up thinking they were just used for sex. We all have our deal breakers and sexual compatibility is very important to me. Would I be able to tell a man that his penis is just too small or that he couldn't find his way around a vagina with a map? Probably not. But I would tell him that I just didn't think we were a match instead of just disappearing. I think a lot of men just find the avoidance approach easier than having to deal with the conversation that follows.

 

 

Very good points.

 

 

I can remember many years ago, a teenage girl wrote in to Ann Landers and said that her teenage BF had dropped off the map and asked Ann what happened.

 

 

Ann Landers told her that boys do not typically break up with girls in the formal sense but just stop calling and stop coming around.....unless they want "something" (this was the early '80s and we all just kind of knew what that "something" was)

 

 

So this is nothing new. and while just disappearing may the norm for teenage boys, it is something that a lot of men don't outgrow in adulthood either.

 

 

Men just simply don't break up with women like women do with men. Men just kind of stop pursuing and stop courting and stop wooing. But since there was never any formal declaration of break up, they still consider it an option and may show up at midnight a month later with a six pack of beer and a hard on.

[thefooloftheyear]

I am definitely one that recognizes this side of the fence from a man's viewpoint. Mostly because I've talked to a lot of guys that have expressed similar reasons for why they didn't continue pursuing certain women. The problem is that they don't want to tell a woman that she smelled bad, wasn't good in bed, or that the physical connection wasn't there. So they just fall off the map, even though they were in constant communication before having sex, and the woman ends up thinking they were just used for sex. We all have our deal breakers and sexual compatibility is very important to me. Would I be able to tell a man that his penis is just too small or that he couldn't find his way around a vagina with a map? Probably not. But I would tell him that I just didn't think we were a match instead of just disappearing. I think a lot of men just find the avoidance approach easier than having to deal with the conversation that follows.

 

Well said.....

 

I can also add that if a woman gives in early, a lot of guys are probably going to think she's gotten handed around like a Thanksgiving turkey...So, in reality many women think that they are doing themselves a favor by being more sexually ready and approachable-thinking thats what most guys want..But in reality it winds up giving a bad impression and they sabotage themselves...If they are just in it for "fun" then none of this applies..

 

It might not be fair...But in reality most of this ritualistic stuff is ever considered fair or reasonable(from either side)..It must be VERY frustrating if a guy drops off the map...But then again, is it better to disappear or just get used up until something better comes up.?

 

 

TFY

[Emilia]

Well said.....

 

I can also add that if a woman gives in early, a lot of guys are probably going to think she's gotten handed around like a Thanksgiving turkey...So, in reality many women think that they are doing themselves a favor by being more sexually ready and approachable-thinking thats what most guys want..But in reality it winds up giving a bad impression and they sabotage themselves...If they are just in it for "fun" then none of this applies..

 

It might not be fair...But in reality most of this ritualistic stuff is ever considered fair or reasonable(from either side)..It must be VERY frustrating if a guy drops off the map...But then again, is it better to disappear or just get used up until something better comes up.?

 

TFY

This is one of the reasons why I don't date strangers (ie the men I end up 'sleeping early with' I have known for months or years) and also why I have sex early. I weed out those that have incompatible values with me. After all, it's the same thought process for me. If a guy sleeps with me early on, I also have to decide whether I should take him seriously. Maybe he is a male slut, who knows? This is where getting to know him through traditional ways (friends' circle, etc) comes in handy. We are aware of each other's character already.

 

I rejected a very very good looking man once because he was basically a man whore sleeping with anything and anyone. He is the best looking man to date I have had the opportunity to sleep with but I knew through friends' circles what he was like. Apparently he wasn't used to 'no' so I explained to him the 'actions have consequences' part and he was offended.

 

It is what it is.

[edgygirl]

If you have a sensitive heart and think sex means something then by all means don't have sex before the promise of an exclusive relationship.

 

If on the other end, you are a woman that don't equate sex to love then sex on a 1st date or on the 10th date makes no difference.

 

I have sex early. I'm older, I've been around, I know sex is not a commitment, it doesn't even mean the guy likes me. If I don't hear from him after that then *meh*, at least I have not invested any feelings in him. I would never be heart broken over a man I saw twice and had sex with on second date. I guard my heart much more then I guard my.......

 

To me sex compatibility is extremely important, that is why I'm quick to test it. If we don't fit in bed then I am not interested in a relationship with the person. I am sorry, I am not investing 1-2-3 months in a man that will turned out to have a micro-d1ck, doesn't do oral, and has huge hick-ups about sex.

 

The problem with the ladies is they don't respect their own wants and needs. If you know you will get hurt if a guy bails after sex then respect your emotional needs/wants and don't DO IT.

 

One of the best posts I've seen on LS to counter attack all the puritanical posts that a woman should wait months to sleep with someone. I'm with Gaeta, I can wait a few dates to see if I am not with a complete jerk but I'm not wasting my time to then find out about the microthing, the bad sex, the no oral. Lol. Thank you so much for this post, I should save it somewhere.

 

As for the OP, you apparently don't live in a city like NY for example. I've seen more than one post blaming woman for trying to find a nice guy and getting screwed... come on. As if it was the women fault for being naive. If you lived here, you'd see how hard it is to find someone who is not a jerk.

[Smthn_Like_Olivia]

I was this way even in my early 20s. I remember one guy that was pretty hot, great body. I'd known him a couple months on friendly terms, and we got along real well. At some point we decided to consummate the relationship. I was not impressed. He was one of those that makes you wonder if it was in yet and he was done in less than 2 minutes. When we parted ways he asked if I was going to call him, and then before I could answer, he mumbled, "Yea, you're gonna call." HA!

 

Needless to say, I didn't call and four days later he was leaving me messages wondering what happened to me. I never told him why, but I made it clear we were not a relationship match. He was quite the player, and was taken aback by my nonchalant attitude about the whole thing. We became really good friends afterwards and kept in touch for many years until he got married.

[thefooloftheyear]

One of the best posts I've seen on LS to counter attack all the puritanical posts that a woman should wait months to sleep with someone. I'm with Gaeta, I can wait a few dates to see if I am not with a complete jerk but I'm not wasting my time to then find out about the microthing, the bad sex, the no oral. Lol. Thank you so much for this post, I should save it somewhere.

 

As for the OP, you apparently don't live in a city like NY for example. I've seen more than one post blaming woman for trying to find a nice guy and getting screwed... come on. As if it was the women fault for being naive. If you lived here, you'd see how hard it is to find someone who is not a jerk.

 

Hmmmm....Please correect me if I am wrong ladies, Im not a woman, but I would think ANY woman is going to have a pretty good idea what a guy is packing on the first passionate close kiss without getting undressed and getting the ruler out..Or suffering the indignity of outright asking..And so what if a guy is endowed and is good in bed, then dumps her after a month because she gave in too early and he lost respect for her..? It happens..

 

 

I would think there is a better potential for a letdown for the guy, quite frankly...You have no clue what she is capable of or what is going on down there..And women have devised all types of methods with trick undergarments to hide whats reality once the curtain falls..

 

Not referring to anyone in particular, just saying ...People have every right to do what they want and use any method they need in the vetting process .I wouldnt never judge anyone there..

 

TFY

[Smthn_Like_Olivia]

Hmmmm....Please correct me if I am wrong ladies, Im not a woman, but I would think ANY woman is going to have a pretty good idea what a guy is packing on the first passionate close kiss without getting undressed and getting the ruler out..Or suffering the indignity of outright asking..And so what if a guy is endowed and is good in bed, then dumps her after a month because she gave in too early and he lost respect for her..? It happens..

TFY

 

You are thinking WRONG. How the heck would we know what a guy is packing from a close passionate kiss?? I'm 38 years old and I've never been able to determine a man's length and girth while soft with clothes on. Just not possible. And the whole thing about knowing whether or not you're sexually compatible is not just about size. It's also about preferences, what you're comfortable with, and whether or not there is mutual satisfaction. I've been with well-endowed men who thought their penis was God's gift to women when in reality they didn't have the first clue on how to satisfy a woman. My ex was well-endowed and I could only tolerate sex with him once every 2 months or so. It was not pleasurable nor satisfying. My guy now is less endowed and the sex is incredible. We'll go 2-3 times in a single night and then again in the morning. He KNOWS what he's doing.

 

If a man loses respect for you for having sex with him too soon, then he is a hypocrite, plain and simple. How could you push for and participate in a sexual act and then condemn someone for it?? In my 38 years I've had MANY close male friends that have shared MANY stories about their sexual encounters. Not a SINGLE ONE has ever told me that he dropped a girl because she gave in too soon. There were various other reasons, but never that.

[thefooloftheyear]

You are thinking WRONG. How the heck would we know what a guy is packing from a close passionate kiss?? I'm 38 years old and I've never been able to determine a man's length and girth while soft with clothes on. Just not possible. And the whole thing about knowing whether or not you're sexually compatible is not just about size. It's also about preferences, what you're comfortable with, and whether or not there is mutual satisfaction. I've been with well-endowed men who thought their penis was God's gift to women when in reality they didn't have the first clue on how to satisfy a woman. My ex was well-endowed and I could only tolerate sex with him once every 2 months or so. It was not pleasurable nor satisfying. My guy now is less endowed and the sex is incredible. We'll go 2-3 times in a single night and then again in the morning. He KNOWS what he's doing.

 

If a man loses respect for you for having sex with him too soon, then he is a hypocrite, plain and simple. How could you push for and participate in a sexual act and then condemn someone for it?? In my 38 years I've had MANY close male friends that have shared MANY stories about their sexual encounters. Not a SINGLE ONE has ever told me that he dropped a girl because she gave in too soon. There were various other reasons, but never that.

 

So I guess you've never said "is that a gun in your pocket, or are you just happy to see me?":laugh:

 

Without getting too blunt...You're wrong...MANY men are going to be full out, long before the clothes come off..You'd know for 100% , but ill give you the benefit of the doubt, and accept the fact that you just didnt have that experience in your life or you werent perceptive enough -whatever ...But yes, its absolutely possible and quite likely, if you just took a glance or brushed up against it- for many guys..

 

With all due respect, you're also not quite correct on the second point..You might be surprised at this, but many men, would NEVER push for something like that...Quite frankly, its inappropriate under any circumstances for a guy to push for that early on-especially if the woman was a stranger before they met..For guys with self respect and common courtesy, that type of stuff usually happens organically, without being coerced or pushed..So how does that make them a hypocrite, if they didnt push -but she did because she was on a fact finding mission...?? And yes, believe it or you dont, Im telling you as a guy(and many guys will agree), that a woman that initiates and pushes sex early on is going to look unfavorable in a lot of instances..Why? Because the simple fact is that if they are that forthcoming with them, then its a pretty safe bet that they were that forthcoming with everyone else...No one thinks they are that special.

 

Im older than you, and not really sure which type of guys you talk to, but one thing is consistent with men...They NEVER share their past sexual exploits with women...be it friends, family, whatever..A douchebag type of guy might puff his chest out and share with another sex partner, but thats a ridiculously dumb move. Not the guys in my circle, anyway...Theyll talk about it with their male friends, but women on the street? never....

 

TFY

Edited March 10, 2014 by thefooloftheyear

[rosedl]

Well, one never does know.

 

I slept with my ex partner of 12 years on the first date.

 

I slept with my ex boyfriend of a year and a half after over a year of friendship and he was a severe commitment phobe and left me twice. He was the type that fit the line...men can fake entire relationships.

 

I have also slept with a couple of guys just because I wanted to sleep with them, and I didn't care there wasn't a long term relationship.

 

And, if a guy likes the sex with you, he may play the into you card until he gets bored or wants a new flavor. So, a woman can withhold sex and just get dumped.

[Smthn_Like_Olivia]

So I guess you've never said "is that a gun in your pocket, or are you just happy to see me?":laugh:

 

Without getting too blunt...You're wrong...MANY men are going to be full out, long before the clothes come off..You'd know for 100% , but ill give you the benefit of the doubt, and accept the fact that you just didnt have that experience in your life or you werent perceptive enough -whatever ...But yes, its absolutely possible and quite likely, if you just took a glance or brushed up against it- for many guys..

 

With all due respect, you're also not quite correct on the second point..You might be surprised at this, but many men, would NEVER push for something like that...Quite frankly, its inappropriate under any circumstances for a guy to push for that early on-especially if the woman was a stranger before they met..For guys with self respect and common courtesy, that type of stuff usually happens organically, without being coerced or pushed..So how does that make them a hypocrite, if they didnt push -but she did because she was on a fact finding mission...?? And yes, believe it or you dont, Im telling you as a guy(and many guys will agree), that a woman that initiates and pushes sex early on is going to look unfavorable in a lot of instances..Why? Because the simple fact is that if they are that forthcoming with them, then its a pretty safe bet that they were that forthcoming with everyone else...No one thinks they are that special.

 

Im older than you, and not really sure which type of guys you talk to, but one thing is consistent with men...They NEVER share their past sexual exploits with women...be it friends, family, whatever..A douchebag type of guy might puff his chest out and share with another sex partner, but thats a ridiculously dumb move. Not the guys in my circle, anyway...Theyll talk about it with their male friends, but women on the street? never....

 

TFY

With all due respect, you must live in a completely separate world than I live. Since you seem to KNOW this as fact, then I'm going to assume you've brushed up against a man before and was fully able to determine his penis size?? I still call bull**** on this one, unless he was wearing spandex or tights. The majority of my dates wear jeans or slacks and they're not tight and it's not possible. I also don't know that many men that are gonna be fully erect from a KISS unless they haven't had any in awhile and their mind has already been preoccupied with sex.

 

Again, many men would never push for sex?? Really?? Do you actually read the threads on this forum?? And the discussion was not a woman "pushing" for sex, stop twisting it, it was about women having sex early on. If a man has sex with a women early on and then has the audacity to look down on her, then YES, he IS a hypocrite. You can't participate in an act that requires two parties as a grown consenting adult and then try to act like you are completely faultless. It doesn't matter who initiates, sex doesn't happen unless both parties agree. If you go along with a friend and participate in a murder, are you not guilty because it wasn't your idea?? I think not.

 

And AGAIN, men would NEVER share their sexual exploits with a woman?? Lol. I don't know what planet you live on, but I speak from experience and not some unfounded opinion. Your circle of friends does not represent the male gender. I don't care how old you are. Who said anything about women on the street?? I said my MANY male friends over the years, not Joe Schmoe I met at the corner store.

[Emilia]

Hmmmm....Please correect me if I am wrong ladies, Im not a woman, but I would think ANY woman is going to have a pretty good idea what a guy is packing on the first passionate close kiss without getting undressed and getting the ruler out..Or suffering the indignity of outright asking..And so what if a guy is endowed and is good in bed, then dumps her after a month because she gave in too early and he lost respect for her..? It happens..

What kind of women do you hang out with?

[Emilia]

With all due respect, you're also not quite correct on the second point..You might be surprised at this, but many men, would NEVER push for something like that...Quite frankly, its inappropriate under any circumstances for a guy to push for that early on-especially if the woman was a stranger before they met..For guys with self respect and common courtesy, that type of stuff usually happens organically, without being coerced or pushed..So how does that make them a hypocrite, if they didnt push -but she did because she was on a fact finding mission...?? And yes, believe it or you dont, Im telling you as a guy(and many guys will agree), that a woman that initiates and pushes sex early on is going to look unfavorable in a lot of instances..Why? Because the simple fact is that if they are that forthcoming with them, then its a pretty safe bet that they were that forthcoming with everyone else...No one thinks they are that special.

 

Im older than you, and not really sure which type of guys you talk to, but one thing is consistent with men...They NEVER share their past sexual exploits with women...be it friends, family, whatever..A douchebag type of guy might puff his chest out and share with another sex partner, but thats a ridiculously dumb move. Not the guys in my circle, anyway...Theyll talk about it with their male friends, but women on the street? never....

 

TFY

I find older men often have this view yes, I agree. This is why I don't date them

 

Younger men are way less conservative and much more relaxed. More on my wavelength for sure.