Conversation with friend always turns to relationships

[Geek Down]

I hang out with a friend of mine alot. She and I hang out about 3-5 times a week. I have previously told her that I love her and we didn't really talk for a few months after that. She then texts me out of the blue and we start talking again.

 

Now, in the past I've spent alot of time with her when she was between boyfriends. She finds a new one, and I don't see her for a while. This time though, we are seeing each other alot more and she is not looking to date anyone. She recently made a huge mistake and got introuble with the law. Her boyfriend dumped her the same day.

 

I started hanging out with her alot more. We started doing things together that we never used to do and the conversations turn to relationships, future desires and sex alot now. All my friends tell me that we are both into each other and I see it too. They all say the same thing..'you guys sit too close, laugh too loud with each other." I haven't brought it up to her, for fear of pushing her away when she's not quite ready to talk about if there is more for us.

 

She's started texting me good morning or good night, or sending a random text in the day to say hi. Her language is changing too.. She keeps talking about stuff we NEED to do together...places we should go and things we should do.

 

Last night we spoke again about relationships. She says shes waiting for that 'feeling' that will tell her its right. That she never has had that feeling with anyone. We both agree on alot and get along very, very well. We've never been physical, but we have both been naked together a few times.

 

I've been hinting that she should sleep over and I've implied that we could sleep in different rooms. She seems open to it, but apprehensive. I can understand why too! I know she's scared of being hurt and I know she's scared to mess up our relationship as it is..

 

The questions on my mind are... Why did she contact me again, when I told her that I wanted a romantic relationship with her? When we started hanging out again, she was single. A few weeks later she met a guy, but said even then it wouldn't last. I get the feeling that she's trying to say something without saying it.

 

Why does she now talk about relationships when we are alone? She's confessed to me about a few sexual encounters that she's had and what she likes in bed and that kinda thing.. She had a night with a lesbian friend of hers awhile ago and told me about it. I told her how hot it was and that I was getting alittle excited..She didn't stop telling me about it. When we were younger and both were in relationships before, all four of us did get naked on a few occations and fool around with our partners infront of each other. It all stopped when my partner caught her staring at my package. She has also told me that she liked playing stripping games with me when she's drunk.