Did he just break "No Contact"?

[Cheerbabe93]

My boyfriend and I met in April 2012 and started dating the week after we met, We had like this instant connection thing going on thats why I kinda thought we would last. I live in Germany and he is in the military and he was stationed here. We had a pretty good time, he took me on little vacations to Disneyland Paris and to the beach in Nice, France. Anyways… In March 2013 he had to move back to the States, saying goodbye to him was the hardest thing and I felt as if my life was over, I felt so lost. About 4 weeks after he had left I booked a flight ticket and flew to Colorado to see him (crazy I know) After I spent three weeks with him I had to go back home. But I spent my entire summer break being with him in Colorado again. It was perfect. Then for his 28th birthday in October I went to see him again. We even bought a puppy together (he's the same breed as bentley) I went back for Christmas and New Years. So I flew 4 times to Colorado to visit him. I now realise how crazy that was because I spent so much money and I am really mad now that I put so much time, effort and money into this. My birthday was a few days after Valentines day and we skyped on my birthday. He told me he got me something for both holidays and that he would mail them out soon (I am still waiting…meaning he never sent them out) When we skyped everything seemed perfect, he even told me to go visit him in April for our 2 year anniversary and that he would take me camping before he gets deployed. 4 days after we skyped I woke up to a text from him, it said "I have someone else now" thats all he texted me. I replied asking "what" but he never texted me back. That was the last time we "talked" even though I wouldn't call that talking. I don't understand how he could go from wanting me to visit him in April to replacing me within only four days? How is that even possible?

He has been talking a lot of **** about me to his friends and my best friend, he even sent around some of the pictures he has of me and he is telling dirty lies about me, making it look like I was the bad guy. I was so crazy about him though, I spoilt him so much, for his birthday I got him VIP concert tickets to see Chris Brown (his favourite singer) they cost me like 400 bucks. And I didn't even get a card for my birthday.

A few days ago he posted a picture on Instagram of him with his new girl and the caption said "Friday Night Crush"

He always uses Instagram only for the filters and then uploads the pictures on Facebook but he didn't do it this time. Do you think he did that because he knew I would see the picture? I got so upset because he looks so happy. Not like fake happy, he looks genuinely happy with that new girl. How can he forget me so fast? Also why doesn't he seem to care that I am not trying to talk to him?

Another problem I have is that I still have things of mine at his apartment in Colorado, like some clothes, a superintend, xbox and a hello kitty toaster and the matching microwave. I bought all these things with my money and I kind of want them back but I don't know how since he is not talking to me and I don't want to seem desperate by trying to talk to him.

I am still not over him, I truly loved him with all of my heart even though he didn't do much for me, I was the one putting all the effort in and I know I have to forget him and move on but I just don't understand how he can move on so fast and not even care about me anymore. I am 21 by the way so he is a little older than me.

 

Sorry this got so long

[legion113]

I don't think he's moving too fast..I think he checked out of the relationship awhile ago. Once he got confirmation that this new girl was really interested, he bailed on you. If she had declined being his girlfriend, believe me, you would have gotten your presents (she probably got them by the way for valentine's since he seems like a cheap douchebag) and he would have expected you to show up April.

[Cheerbabe93]

Boyfriend dumped me via text three weeks ago. He left me for someone else and the last thing I heard from him was his text saying "I have someone else now" I didn't try to contact him at all.

I've been doing so good

 

About an hour ago I changed my profile picture on Facebook and now I just got a notification saying that he "liked" it.

Why did he do that?

He has been acting like I don't even exist, like I'm a stranger and nothing ever happened between us. We were together for almost 2 years

 

Am I overthinking this? But why did he like my picture after NC for three weeks?

 

Needles to say I'm a total mess now and I'm back to crying my eyes out. I feel like I'm right back at day one. Ugh :|

[somecamel]

Boyfriend dumped me via text three weeks ago. He left me for someone else and the last thing I heard from him was his text saying "I have someone else now" I didn't try to contact him at all.

I've been doing so good

 

About an hour ago I changed my profile picture on Facebook and now I just got a notification saying that he "liked" it.

Why did he do that?

He has been acting like I don't even exist, like I'm a stranger and nothing ever happened between us. We were together for almost 2 years

 

Am I overthinking this? But why did he like my picture after NC for three weeks?

 

Needles to say I'm a total mess now and I'm back to crying my eyes out. I feel like I'm right back at day one. Ugh :|

 

 

Why is he still a friend on your Facebook and why haven't you blocked him?

[Cheerbabe93]

Why is he still a friend on your Facebook and why haven't you blocked him?

 

I want him back. That's why I didn't delete him.

[somecamel]

I want him back. That's why I didn't delete him.

 

After what he done?

[ConfusedHumanBeing]

Boyfriend dumped me via text three weeks ago. He left me for someone else and the last thing I heard from him was his text saying "I have someone else now" I didn't try to contact him at all.

I've been doing so good

 

About an hour ago I changed my profile picture on Facebook and now I just got a notification saying that he "liked" it.

Why did he do that?

He has been acting like I don't even exist, like I'm a stranger and nothing ever happened between us. We were together for almost 2 years

 

Am I overthinking this? But why did he like my picture after NC for three weeks?

 

Needles to say I'm a total mess now and I'm back to crying my eyes out. I feel like I'm right back at day one. Ugh :|

 

If there is a definition for overthinking, this would be it.

 

He liked a picture. Thats it. You shouldnt be friends with him on there in the first place. I can only imagine you check his page every ten minutes.

 

He's been acting like that because he doesnt want to be apart of the relationship anymore. He broke up with you through a text...thats awful. THEN told you that he has someone else. AND you still want him back??? Thats awful.

 

Block him, go no contact, and keep moving forward. This means nothing.

[Cheerbabe93]

Also, he didn't break NC if he never started NC. He dumped you for someone else so why would he need to go NC? A like is not breaking contact, it's just a like.

 

I understand your feelings about this but really you are going to be disappointed regardless because a) your ex is a bonafide jerk and b) if it means anything it means he has regrets about dumping you for current gf and is thinking someday he can win you back and hopefully you love yourself more than that.

 

No I think he is doing NC too. Because when he texted me three weeks ago to say he has someone else I replied asking "what?" And he never texted me back. After that I just let it go. But isn't that kind of NC too?

[KaliLove]

Breadcrumbs. He wants to make sure you're still pining for him while he's banging his new girlfriend. It's an ego trip. Block him.

[Cheerbabe93]

If there is a definition for overthinking, this would be it.

 

He liked a picture. Thats it. You shouldnt be friends with him on there in the first place. I can only imagine you check his page every ten minutes.

 

He's been acting like that because he doesnt want to be apart of the relationship anymore. He broke up with you through a text...thats awful. THEN told you that he has someone else. AND you still want him back??? Thats awful.

 

Block him, go no contact, and keep moving forward. This means nothing.

 

Well I started NC after he sent me that break up text and I am still doing NC. I actually have no intention to break it any time soon. I think I will do it for more than 30 days cause I still feel too emotional about the situation to talk to him and I don't even think I would have much to say to him right now other than yelling at him out of anger and frustration.

 

But I am not gonna delete him from my friendslist because I read online that you should not unfriend your ex because you should show them that you are doing good without them and that they will eventually want you back.

 

I got it from this site called exboyfriendrecovery.com

[thinkingofhim]

I think a better way of showing him what he's missing is to block him and cut him out of your life. He has your number, he can contact you if he wants to. He doesn't need to be getting a window into your life on Facebook.

[organizedchaos]

Well I started NC after he sent me that break up text and I am still doing NC. I actually have no intention to break it any time soon. I think I will do it for more than 30 days cause I still feel too emotional about the situation to talk to him and I don't even think I would have much to say to him right now other than yelling at him out of anger and frustration.

 

But I am not gonna delete him from my friendslist because I read online that you should not unfriend your ex because you should show them that you are doing good without them and that they will eventually want you back.

 

I got it from this site called exboyfriendrecovery.com

 

Don't pay any attention to those sites and what they say.

[Zahara]

Well I started NC after he sent me that break up text and I am still doing NC. I actually have no intention to break it any time soon. I think I will do it for more than 30 days cause I still feel too emotional about the situation to talk to him and I don't even think I would have much to say to him right now other than yelling at him out of anger and frustration.

 

But I am not gonna delete him from my friendslist because I read online that you should not unfriend your ex because you should show them that you are doing good without them and that they will eventually want you back.

I got it from this site called exboyfriendrecovery.com

 

That's the dumbest thing I've ever heard. Either FB has magical powers that I have no clue about or there are people out there blogging nonsense. And sadly, people that are hurt and especially hopeful will lap it all up.

[Zahara]

http://www.loveshack.org/forums/breaking-up-reconciliation-coping/breaks-breaking-up/465802-he-dumped-me-out-blue

 

You need to wake up. After reading that, it's very apparent that he checked out a long while ago. You gave him no reason to put in any effort into you. You did everything. He got the perks you offered hin and then he dumped you for someone else. And all he said was he found someone else. That's how much he valued you.

 

Move on from this. He's with someone else and he treated you like crap.

[sleeplessinslc]

I want him back. That's why I didn't delete him.

 

Where's your self respect? He dumped you.

 

Moving on would be so so so much harder if you don't block him.

[sleeplessinslc]

I am 21 by the way so he is a little older than me.

 

 

How'd you get all the money at your age?

 

So many wrong things you did in the relationship. You did most of the work. You did most of the investing- that's why it was so easy for him to bail out of the relationship.

 

It may sound old fashioned but if you want the relationship to last- let the guy do the pursuing.

[Cheerbabe93]

I am 21 by the way so he is a little older than me.

 

 

How'd you get all the money at your age?

 

So many wrong things you did in the relationship. You did most of the work. You did most of the investing- that's why it was so easy for him to bail out of the relationship.

 

It may sound old fashioned but if you want the relationship to last- let the guy do the pursuing.

 

I took the money out of my savings. I am a fulltime college student so I dont have time to get a job. I still owe money to my parents too

[sleeplessinslc]

 

But I am not gonna delete him from my friendslist because I read online that you should not unfriend your ex because you should show them that you are doing good without them and that they will eventually want you back.

 

I got it from this site called exboyfriendrecovery.com

 

I too thought that the mature thing to do is to keep an ex on FB- but, lo and behold, it is not.

 

Please please please do yourself a favor and block him. The best way to let him know how you're doing is TO NOT LET HIM KNOW HOW YOU'RE DOING.

 

Good luck. Be strong. You can do it.

[sleeplessinslc]

I took the money out of my savings. I am a fulltime college student so I dont have time to get a job. I still owe money to my parents too

 

Gah! You did the right thing- for the wrong guy. It sucks. Do yourself a favor and move on. It will take time to fully recover , it will take time to forgive yourself but believe me- you will find someone who will love you and treasure you.

 

And such is love. Sometimes we lose. Sometimes we make mistakes. The man who deserves your love is out there somewhere. Don't waste any more of your time on a man who rejected you. You deserve better. Please forget him.

[Cheerbabe93]

I too thought that the mature thing to do is to keep an ex on FB- but, lo and behold, it is not.

 

Please please please do yourself a favor and block him. The best way to let him know how you're doing is TO NOT LET HIM KNOW HOW YOU'RE DOING.

 

Good luck. Be strong. You can do it.

 

I am really scared to unfriend him though. Part of me feels like I should do it and it would give me the chance to slightly turn this breakup around and "dump" him as well but the other part of me is scared that he will forget about me completely. I mean I know he did not treat me right but I love him and I want him back.

 

He is in the military and he is getting deployed pretty soon and they will stop here in germany and part of me is hoping that he will call me up and ask me to come meet him. Part of me would want to turn him down, half of me would want to go see him. But I dont even know if thats gonna happen.

 

I am just scared of losing him forever and not having him in my life, we used to talk every day and this is really hard for me. Maybe because it was my first serious and longterm relationship.

[KaliLove]

Well I started NC after he sent me that break up text and I am still doing NC. I actually have no intention to break it any time soon. I think I will do it for more than 30 days cause I still feel too emotional about the situation to talk to him and I don't even think I would have much to say to him right now other than yelling at him out of anger and frustration.

 

But I am not gonna delete him from my friendslist because I read online that you should not unfriend your ex because you should show them that you are doing good without them and that they will eventually want you back.

 

I got it from this site called exboyfriendrecovery.com

 

You know those sites are a crock of *****, right? Your ex will only come back if he actually wants to come back, whether you follow all the rules or not, and nobody's ex will come back if they don't get over them and make some serious changes to themselves.

 

Your ex is an ex for a reason.

[KaliLove]

I am really scared to unfriend him though. Part of me feels like I should do it and it would give me the chance to slightly turn this breakup around and "dump" him as well but the other part of me is scared that he will forget about me completely. I mean I know he did not treat me right but I love him and I want him back.

 

He is in the military and he is getting deployed pretty soon and they will stop here in germany and part of me is hoping that he will call me up and ask me to come meet him. Part of me would want to turn him down, half of me would want to go see him. But I dont even know if thats gonna happen.

 

I am just scared of losing him forever and not having him in my life, we used to talk every day and this is really hard for me. Maybe because it was my first serious and longterm relationship.

 

Doesn't he have a girlfriend? Why would you want to help him cheat on her?

[Cheerbabe93]

Doesn't he have a girlfriend? Why would you want to help him cheat on her?

 

I don't think they are official. Maybe not even close to being boyfriend and girlfriend. And I know this is gonna sound bad but I do not care about his new crush at all. And one thing that really bothers me is that he posted a picture of them together online and I saw it and I got so upset because he always told me I put too much eyeliner on even though I never did and then I see this picture and her entire eyes are covered in black. And she has blonde hair. He made me dye my hair black from brown and now he has a blonde girl?

 

Ugh

[somecamel]

I am really scared to unfriend him though. Part of me feels like I should do it and it would give me the chance to slightly turn this breakup around and "dump" him as well but the other part of me is scared that he will forget about me completely. I mean I know he did not treat me right but I love him and I want him back.

 

He is in the military and he is getting deployed pretty soon and they will stop here in germany and part of me is hoping that he will call me up and ask me to come meet him. Part of me would want to turn him down, half of me would want to go see him. But I dont even know if thats gonna happen.

 

I am just scared of losing him forever and not having him in my life, we used to talk every day and this is really hard for me. Maybe because it was my first serious and longterm relationship.

 

Please wake up and smell the coffee, turn that unrequited love into some anger and have a real think about what he done to you.

 

You didn't deserve that, no one does.

 

If he does come back through Germany are you going to let him call you up, get some sex and then **** off again?

 

You need to try some NC, it's for you to heal from this. You've already lost him and things will never be the same after what he done.

 

Why can't you see this?

[Cheerbabe93]

Please wake up and smell the coffee, turn that unrequited love into some anger and have a real think about what he done to you.

 

You didn't deserve that, no one does.

 

If he does come back through Germany are you going to let him call you up, get some sex and then **** off again?

 

You need to try some NC, it's for you to heal from this. You've already lost him and things will never be the same after what he done.

 

Why can't you see this?

 

I am currently doing NC. This is the third week. I didnt say I would go hook up with him if he did call me once he is back in germany for the night. Maybe I wouldnt pick up, maybe i would just to say hell no. But like I said I might not even get the chance.