Mr Spock Posted January 26, 2005 Share Posted January 26, 2005 I had planned to go to my close friend's party she had planned tonight, I said I'd cancel my plans with a guy and move them to another day. I didn't, and called to tell her I wouldn't make it. She's pissed, not just at me-another friend cancelled as well but there were still people planning on going. She cancelled the whole party, and I feel really bad. It's the very first time I've ever said I was going to do something and not done it-we both hate it when people do that. I offered to cancel when I saw how upset she was (I didn't WANT to really, I just told her she was more important to me and I would) she said no. She did say it wasn't just because of me. She wasn't throwing it for me, but a friend had wanted to get together and so she'd asked people. There isn't really any way of making up for ditching your friend for a guy. I think to show her how badly I feel I'm going to throw her a suprise party next week on the same day. Link to post Share on other sites
InsideOut Posted January 26, 2005 Share Posted January 26, 2005 Hi Mr. Spock... You did the right thing by letting her know that you weren't going to go. I got the sense that she was mad as she really wanted you to be at the party... but she didn't tell you that directly (she said that it was a party for many people). I understand how you'd feel sorry for her... and I believe that you shouldn't feel guilty as her intentions (that she wanted you to be there) weren't made clear at the beginning. What do you think? (But please let me know if I'm way off on my assumption!) I believe that it would be a really kind gesture to throw a party for her... whether it be a surprise or not... and I'd be sure to tell her that you'd REALLY like for her to be there. Or IMO you can ask her to join you in doing something fun. (i.e. just two of you spending some quality fun time together.) I hope this helped! Link to post Share on other sites
Author Mr Spock Posted January 26, 2005 Author Share Posted January 26, 2005 We talk every day. I think the thing that bothered her is that no one was really confirming if they'd be there-everyone was stopping by 'later' as they all had things to do before, and me going back on my word was the straw that broke the camel's back. And there isn't anything you can do to make it up either, except just be patient and supportive. Link to post Share on other sites
Stone Posted January 26, 2005 Share Posted January 26, 2005 I can see why she is upset, throwing parties is very stressful although she did overreact a bit It was good that you we're completely honest with her.. I think in a few days she will be cooled off. It's nothing a batch of flowers won't fix Link to post Share on other sites
Author Mr Spock Posted January 26, 2005 Author Share Posted January 26, 2005 Still mad. Things still aren't right. What to do? Just leave her alone? Told her to call me later, ball in her court. Link to post Share on other sites
tiki Posted January 26, 2005 Share Posted January 26, 2005 Tell her you're truly sorry. Then offer up a girl's night out...or girl's night in. Everything your treat. Link to post Share on other sites
Stone Posted January 26, 2005 Share Posted January 26, 2005 Originally posted by Mr Spock Still mad. Things still aren't right. What to do? Just leave her alone? Told her to call me later, ball in her court. Spock this is so off topic but you strike me as the Samantha Jones type..( sex in the city) who I adore by the way seems like you have the same type of relationship with your friends as her charater. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Mr Spock Posted January 27, 2005 Author Share Posted January 27, 2005 I bought her hot pink roses and apologised for being selfish in a card and stressed how important her friendship is to me. She left a msg on my machine thanking me and said she'd call later. So that's that. I just feel bad because it's like I am the one person that she can count on and I didn't keep my word. Hate that feeling. Link to post Share on other sites
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