Jump to content

FWB, is he up for it?


Recommended Posts

Have a friend that is single. She wants NSA sex. Wants to with male friend (has gf,but is actually just keeping her so he us not alone, in our opinion) because she only wants sex. She had a couple drinks and text him that she was coming to town and he should come by her hotel and "have some wine and me". He replied with a short answer asking if she was eluding to sex. She didn't know how to read into it & was embarrassed. Said, yes, but he has gf and sorry that she said anything & felt like an idiot. He said "not an idiot"... She text back, but would you want to & he just "smiley face". Nothing else has been said.

 

I said:

A) he thinks he is being set up to see if he will cheat since she knows his gf (not friends, but they small talk & have discussed his cheating before)

B) he is weighing his options, but doesn't want to commit to it ^^

C) she should drop it unless he brings it up

 

Guys????

Link to post
Share on other sites

First why are you in the middle of this?

 

Second, I have no problem with FWB between consenting SINGLE adults. Since he has a GF this is a bad idea.

  • Like 3
Link to post
Share on other sites
  • Author

I'm in the middle because she is my BFF and asked my opinion. She us justifying because she says he only keeps gf to keep his bed warm. He is a bit of a player and I think that is why she chose him.

Link to post
Share on other sites
I'm in the middle because she is my BFF and asked my opinion. She us justifying because she says he only keeps gf to keep his bed warm. He is a bit of a player and I think that is why she chose him.

 

I think the obvious answer is that they should respect the wishes of the "placeholder GF" and break it off with her. Obviously, I feel that everyone could agree that is the moral way. It's downright mean to put someone through the pain of infidelity like that, unless you're some evil incarnate that is hellbent on revenge, and even then, its arguable.

 

Obviously, the choice lies with them and whether or not they can live with themselves doing such a thing to an innocent party.

 

If you remove the fact that he has a girlfriend.....I don't see how this would even be a problem.

 

Just saying...

Link to post
Share on other sites
  • Author

I agree about the gf. He is a player and she stays knowing he has cheated. It's a bad situation. They are all adults. My question is from a guy perspective, am I right about what I told her about the response from him. My friend is being selfish about her needs, and I know that, so does she. I think she is, again, buying off her conscience that he will continue to cheat on his gf and if she wants to he a doormat, then so be it. Cold & cruel, I know...

Link to post
Share on other sites
thinkingofhim

If she wants NSA sex I don't know why she's hung up on a guy with a gf. I'm sure there are 1000s of guys she could pick from that won't wind up in a drama bomb when the angry gf finds out.

Link to post
Share on other sites

To be honest, I'm just saying what would be morally right.

 

What would I do myself in that situation? Well, you didn't ask that!

  • Like 1
Link to post
Share on other sites

If he is a player, then he's absolutely up for NSA.

 

 

If she is truly your BFF, ask her what it says about her character that she's willing to be the OW? If that doesn't persuade her, ask her to imagine she had a daughter & ask what she would tell her imaginary daughter if the daughter asked about the advisability of having NSA with a taken man.

Link to post
Share on other sites
  • Author

That is brilliant! I still think she is gonna try and justify that it's an unhappy relationship, blah, blah...

Hopefully, she sees the light.

Link to post
Share on other sites
That is brilliant! I still think she is gonna try and justify that it's an unhappy relationship, blah, blah...

Hopefully, she sees the light.

 

To be fair, it seems she's already made up her mind.

 

Good luck!

Link to post
Share on other sites
×
×
  • Create New...