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How much meddling is TOO much meddling??


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What happens when your friend(s) become your parents' friends as well?

 

A 30-something friend of mine (married with children) has, over the past year, developed relations with my father, mainly for professional reasons (they work in the same field). She has also met my mother for coffees once in a while...

 

And after not seeing her since last May, isn't it strange that she calls me continuously to meet up just after the time I moved out my parents' house (a major issue with my father, discussed in a very long thread in here:http://www.loveshack.org/forums/t51540/)? And also recently when it seems my father is at a "dead end" with his personal problems with me, SHE pressures me to meet up for coffee...

 

I ended up meeting her, but also made it clear before AND when we met, that my family problems are personal and that they should remain in the family. Although she used to be a good friend and confidante a couple of years ago, now I just don't feel comfortable telling my personal problems to someone who is also a friend of my parents...

 

I don't intend to meet her again or talk to her again, at least while I have issues with my father. It's just too messy, allowing someone to stick their nose in your personal life, even if (as my father claims) it's done out of good intentions and friendly well-meaning.

 

My fiancee says this is just NOT NORMAL. You can't hang out with your parents' friends, she says. Nor can they hang out with yours. It just blurs the "boundaries".

 

I have to agree, but what does everyone else think?

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Wow, what insight! *grin*

 

That IS a thought that has crossed my mind and even though my father has a -- shall we say SHADY -- history, the particular individual is most likely helping him out in response to the fact that he helped her find a job recently when she was out of work... so it's probably more a "I'll scratch your back, you scratch mine" arrangement...

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