Young single women, who want to date, don't exist

[ltjg45]

I was tried of him ranting at me.

 

At least now he should know not to waste his time writing posts to me anymore.

 

I know he can't see this but I was done with this topic anyway. Either case, I am glad he did it regardless.

 

I really don't have time to deal with stupidity. I spent too much time on this and I am ashamed to admit that much.

[Iguanna]

I know he can't see this but I was done with this topic anyway. Either case, I am glad he did it regardless.

 

I really don't have time to deal with stupidity. I spent too much time on this and I am ashamed to admit that much.

 

We all spent a lot of time. If someone doesn't want to change, they won't. Maybe they will if the hit bottom. I guess this person hasn't yet or is too stubborn to realize it.

[somedude81]

I didn't suggest becoming friends with them and then trying to make it into a relationship after. Chatting someone up every few days for a few weeks or even a month, I would not in anyway consider friends yet. It's just getting to know them and see if you have things in common. If you do, you decide at a point to make a move such as getting a number, asking out on a date, etc.

 

That's exactly what I'm doing.

 

I thought that was the shotgun approach.

 

Why not intentionally pick a girl to try and become friends with who has a BF, that way you should have it in your head prior she is off limits.

I don't try to become friends with girls who have a BF because there are still cute girls left to talk to, that I don't know if they are in a relationship or not.

 

And no, even if I know a girl is in a relationship I still would fall for her if I spent enough time with her. I'm fine being friendly with them, but my time is better spent elsewhere.

[xxoo]

And no, even if I know a girl is in a relationship I still would fall for her if I spent enough time with her. I'm fine being friendly with them, but my time is better spent elsewhere.

 

Being friendly is all you really need to do. Be friendly to women and men, young and old, fat and thin, single and attached. Be the guy people want to be around.

 

You time is best spent studying calc. After that, it's best spent developing your social network. You have no idea how much easier this dating thing would be if you did that.

[shet]

At this point in my life, I'm just not comfortable going up to random girls or groups and trying to start a conversation.

 

It would come off as completely forced and just weird.

 

I need to put myself in more situations where mingling is natural and have plenty of time to do so.

 

But you don't have access to those situations. And have you tried being an anxious, awkward guy at college parties? Not the recipe for learning and success you think, at all.

 

I've been hit on by random people. Rigorously hit on with clear intent. I've never gone for it because it is weird, yes, it is weird for a woman (or a man, had that too) to do that, at least in my world. But what about when they aren't so direct? What about when instead of "cool story, come to my house now" it's "you like X too, great, whats your facebook" or "nice to meet you, see you here again?". Then it isn't so weird. And I've had that too. Desperation can be detected even by a schlemiel like me and it's offputting.

 

If you don't talk to people you'll never meet people. Never meet people, never meet a prospective girlfriend. Duh. You're scared because you're focused laserlike on the concept of a girlfriend and that pressure is riding on your interactions. Nobody can function like that. You have to decouple that pressure from the meeting of people. You think other single men aren't thinking the same thing about every eligible woman they meet? They are, they just aren't letting it cripple them because they maintain a broader outlook that just allows them to enjoy meeting people.

[KathyM]

Put yourself in more situations where you will meet more women. Meetup groups. Interest groups. Volunteer groups. And I would also suggest playing up to your strengths, which in your case, is your dancing skills. A man who can dance well is a rare and attractive feature. You need to play that up by going to dance venues where you can show your strengths. That is how my sister fell in love with her ex husband (2nd ex husband), is because he was such a great dancer. If he hadn't been unfaithful to her, they would still be together. Use every Friday and Saturday night to hit the dance clubs. Learn to dance really well. Maybe even invite a man from your dance class to join you at the clubs so you don't have to go alone. Having a wingman is a useful thing. Ask a guy in your class: "You interested in hitting up the dance clubs this weekend with me, to check out the ladies there, and have some fun with them?" Those men are probably taking the class for the same reason you are: to meet women and to develop dance skills that are attractive to women. And at the club, start by asking the more Plain Janes at the club to dance, so you won't be shot down so easily, but can show your dance skills to the crowd. Then work your way to the ones you are more attracted to. That is what other men do. You have to learn to play up your strengths and develop your interests more.

 

 

And I would agree with you that it's not a good use of your time to spend it flirting with women who already have a boyfriend. Don't be that kind of a guy who poaches other men's girlfriends, or is an opportunist that takes advantage of a rough patch that a girl is going through with her partner. There are plenty of women who are single. You just need to put yourself out there more, and expand your interests.

[Shaun-Dro]

I'm 32 years old, got my first girlfriend at 31, and we were only together for six months.

 

Looking at it that way, do you see how long I've been single?

 

Lets say that I didn't want to start dating until 17, so I've been single from 17 to 31. That means I've been single for 14 years. I've had a girlfriend just long enough to really understand what I was missing.

 

 

I see you take women so seriously and I don't know why? I just lost my last girlfriend who finally contacted me via email claiming that she hates herself and wants everyone to leave her alone. I have no idea where this came from, but it is what it is. I'm just glad she replied to me and isn't laying dead in an alley somewhere.

 

 

Other than that, I'm not worrying about it. She clearly has mental issues. I won't bother with it or her for that matter. I'll just move on.

 

 

And this applies to you Somedude. You need to stop showing desperation to these young dames. It's transparent and it's turning them all off, which is why you're getting all these excuses under the sun from them about not wanting to date you.

[whirl3daway]

somedude - could you answer these questions?

 

1) what do you look like? hair color/style, eye color, height, weight, the way you like to dress, do you wear cologne, do you smile much, etc?

 

2) what do you consider to be "obese" in a woman?

 

3) have you considered going to see a therapist? not because of anything bad, but I always get this sense of deep unhappiness from your posts. something about the way you write makes me feel like you are a very depressed person. that is generally not something I find appealing in a man.

[somedude81]

somedude - could you answer these questions?

 

1) what do you look like? hair color/style, eye color, height, weight, the way you like to dress, do you wear cologne, do you smile much, etc?

 

2) what do you consider to be "obese" in a woman?

 

3) have you considered going to see a therapist? not because of anything bad, but I always get this sense of deep unhappiness from your posts. something about the way you write makes me feel like you are a very depressed person. that is generally not something I find appealing in a man.

I'm a white/Cuban mix with skin a little darker than most white guys, but nobody ever guesses my ethnicity. I have brown hair, brown eyes, roughly average in looks. My hair is short and I always wear product. I keep my facial hair to a very fine amount of stubble.

 

I'm 5'6, 155 lbs. I have a little bit of a gut, but the rest of my weight is muscle. Since I live in SoCal, I'm wearing shorts and a t-shirt 99% of the time. Solid print shirt and plaid shorts, or a printed T and solid color shorts. My ex taught me how to dress. I wear cologne whenever I know I'm going to be around women. I smile almost all the time when I'm around people.

 

Obese to me, is when a woman has fat rolls. A bit of gut is fine on a girl. The most important rule I have about weight is that the girl cannot weigh as much as I do. I prefer women up to 5'8. If a woman is 5'3 and 160lbs, she's very overweight.

 

Yes I am very depressed, unhappy and generally lonely. Though if you saw me in person you would have no idea. My ex didn't even know I was depressed. I don't like being alone so much, and I pretty much only post on this forum when I'm sad and alone.

 

As stupid as it sounds I'm energized by women. I love female attention. That's why girls I know in person have no idea that I'm depressed.

[whirl3daway]

Obese to me, is when a woman has fat rolls. A bit of gut is fine on a girl. The most important rule I have about weight is that the girl cannot weigh as much as I do. I prefer women up to 5'8. If a woman is 5'3 and 160lbs, she's very overweight.

 

I'm 5'6 and 165lbs. I don't have fat rolls (what is a fat roll anyway?) but I do have a tummy. I'm out of your dating criteria since I'm above 155lbs, but I'm also moderately attractive, fun to be around, and a strong, independent woman. Your criteria seems a bit... nitpicky, honestly. Do you automatically rule out women who you judge to be "obese"?

 

Although you say you are smiley and engaged around women, most of us are highly skilled at seeing through that sort of thing. I can always tell when dudes are faking being happy and to me, that is what the turn off is. If you're depressed, that's FINE, everyone gets depressed. But why lie about it? Be yourself, dude. Be open and honest about your struggles. Show your humanity. Women like guys that are willing to be emotional. There's nothing wrong with talking about your flaws, as long as you are willing to work on them. I actually find THAT very appealing.

[pickflicker]

I'm 5'6 and 165lbs. I don't have fat rolls (what is a fat roll anyway?) but I do have a tummy. I'm out of your dating criteria since I'm above 155lbs, but I'm also moderately attractive, fun to be around, and a strong, independent woman. Your criteria seems a bit... nitpicky, honestly. Do you automatically rule out women who you judge to be "obese"?

 

Although you say you are smiley and engaged around women, most of us are highly skilled at seeing through that sort of thing. I can always tell when dudes are faking being happy and to me, that is what the turn off is. If you're depressed, that's FINE, everyone gets depressed. But why lie about it? Be yourself, dude. Be open and honest about your struggles. Show your humanity. Women like guys that are willing to be emotional. There's nothing wrong with talking about your flaws, as long as you are willing to work on them. I actually find THAT very appealing.

 

Good post, but you're flogging a dead horse. I've told him girls can tell, but he didn't listen.

[somedude81]

I'm 5'6 and 165lbs. I don't have fat rolls (what is a fat roll anyway?) but I do have a tummy. I'm out of your dating criteria since I'm above 155lbs, but I'm also moderately attractive, fun to be around, and a strong, independent woman. Your criteria seems a bit... nitpicky, honestly. Do you automatically rule out women who you judge to be "obese"?

I'd have to see you in person to see how the weight looks on you. Fat rolls are when the fat bunches up and folds in areas that it should not. Here's a good example.

 

Yes I do automatically rule out women I judge to be obese. I obviously don't know how much people weigh when I look at them. But if a woman has fat arms and fat rolls she gets ruled out, no matter how great her personality is.

 

I don't believe I'm being nitpicky at all. There are plenty of women out there who meet my bare minimum criteria. Just that the main problems is that the vast majority of men are interested in the same women that I am.

 

 

Although you say you are smiley and engaged around women, most of us are highly skilled at seeing through that sort of thing. I can always tell when dudes are faking being happy and to me, that is what the turn off is.

That's the thing, I'm not faking it. I truly am happy when I'm interacting with women. I'm not putting on a brave face. I'm too busy having fun to worry about my depression.

 

If you're depressed, that's FINE, everyone gets depressed. But why lie about it? Be yourself, dude. Be open and honest about your struggles. Show your humanity. Women like guys that are willing to be emotional. There's nothing wrong with talking about your flaws, as long as you are willing to work on them. I actually find THAT very appealing.

I have no problem talking about my flaws when a woman has earned my trust. I share lots of things, but not everything.

 

My ex knew I had some issues with anger and that I had some issues with motivation in doing homework, my dishes and cleaning. Stuff like that. But I never actually told her that I was depressed, how much she meant to me, or that I've ever contemplated suicide. Perhaps if we had been together for at least a year I would have told her the deeper things. For now I'm glad that I did not.

[organizedchaos]

Good post, but you're flogging a dead horse. I've told him girls can tell, but he didn't listen.

 

Yep, because for a guy who got his first gf at 31, which lasted only for 6 months, he knows better than all of us who have vastly more experience with relationships and have been trying to give him advice.

 

OP, if you think we're not being helpful, it's only because we're frustrated at your stubbornness and willingness to ignore everything we've told you.

[whirl3daway]

I'd have to see you in person to see how the weight looks on you. Fat rolls are when the fat bunches up and folds in areas that it should not. Here's a good example.

 

Yes I do automatically rule out women I judge to be obese. I obviously don't know how much people weigh when I look at them. But if a woman has fat arms and fat rolls she gets ruled out, no matter how great her personality is.

 

I don't believe I'm being nitpicky at all. There are plenty of women out there who meet my bare minimum criteria. Just that the main problems is that the vast majority of men are interested in the same women that I am.

 

 

 

That's the thing, I'm not faking it. I truly am happy when I'm interacting with women. I'm not putting on a brave face. I'm too busy having fun to worry about my depression.

 

 

I have no problem talking about my flaws when a woman has earned my trust. I share lots of things, but not everything.

 

My ex knew I had some issues with anger and that I had some issues with motivation in doing homework, my dishes and cleaning. Stuff like that. But I never actually told her that I was depressed, how much she meant to me, or that I've ever contemplated suicide. Perhaps if we had been together for at least a year I would have told her the deeper things. For now I'm glad that I did not.

 

 

Well, the picture you linked me is a woman who definitely is obese. But I don't have rolls like that on my body. I'm 5'6 and 165lbs and this is what I look like clothed: . I show you this only to show you that I think your idea of "obese" and weight is a little skewed. I'm a perfectly normal looking woman, and you would rule me out because of some idea in your head that isn't even true.

 

Your posts always come off so defensive and touchy. It's like you don't want to hear what people are telling you because you don't want to destroy this image of yourself that you have. Do you LIKE being a victim? I see a lot of that in your posts. You are the only one who has the ability to change your life. A decent looking man of 5'6 should not have this much trouble picking up women - I'd date a 5'6 man no problem and have done so before. Attitude and a nice smile are what attract me.

 

There is no way I could date someone for 4 months+ without wanting to know more about them, especially if I could tell that they were depressed. You seem closed off. You seem like you have a bit of the Madonna/Whore thing going on... you WANT a woman, but you sort of dislike them at the same time.

 

Again, I hope you're going to therapy. That would probably help. Have you tried speed dating?

[Iguanna]

@whirl3daway: You look really cute and you are the kind of girl I would like immediately (and note that I rarely like girls ) - in a friendly way of course!

[somedude81]

Well, the picture you linked me is a woman who definitely is obese. But I don't have rolls like that on my body. I'm 5'6 and 165lbs and this is what I look like clothed: . I show you this only to show you that I think your idea of "obese" and weight is a little skewed. I'm a perfectly normal looking woman, and you would rule me out because of some idea in your head that isn't even true.

You look fine in that picture and I would never guess your weight to be 165. Though it might be more obvious in more reveling clothes. Though as I said before, I don't really know the weights of the people I see. All I know is that young women 5'4 or under, are usually around 120 or less.

 

Also, I'm only 155 because of the muscle I have. Most likely a woman my height wouldn't have nearly as much muscle mass as I do, so the extra weight is because of fat.

Your posts always come off so defensive and touchy. It's like you don't want to hear what people are telling you because you don't want to destroy this image of yourself that you have. Do you LIKE being a victim? I see a lot of that in your posts.

I come off as defensive because many people are being hostile.

 

Do you see how accusatory the part I quoted is? Many people on this forum talk to me like that, so I defend myself.

 

You are the only one who has the ability to change your life. A decent looking man of 5'6 should not have this much trouble picking up women - I'd date a 5'6 man no problem and have done so before. Attitude and a nice smile are what attract me.

There are a few reasons why I've had so much trouble with women. Now that I've gotten a girlfriend, those reasons really don't apply to me anymore, and now my main trouble is finding women that are actually single and want to date. That's why I made this thread.

 

BTW, a lot more than attitude and a nice small goes into whether you want to date a guy or not.

 

There is no way I could date someone for 4 months+ without wanting to know more about them, especially if I could tell that they were depressed.

That's if you could tell they were depressed.

 

Anyways, my ex knew many things about me. I mentioned a couple of them in my previous post.

 

You seem closed off. You seem like you have a bit of the Madonna/Whore thing going on... you WANT a woman, but you sort of dislike them at the same time.

I've been hurt by a lot of women in my life. I've only had one positive experience with a woman, and she ended up hurting me more than anybody ever has. She was the only person I was really starting to open myself up to, and look what happened.

 

My feelings for women are strong and confused.

 

I'm carrying around too much anger, hurt and sadness.

Again, I hope you're going to therapy. That would probably help

I've been in therapy for several years but it didn't help me at all. Basically the main reason for all my issues, is that girls haven't liked me, and I never felt loved.

 

The only time in my life that I ever felt happy was when I was in my too short relationship.

 

I'm really tempted to post a picture of my ex and I but I'm not over her yet and I can't handle seeing any pictures of her.

Have you tried speed dating?

Once, and zero matches. I may try again. Though the very nature of speed dating goes against me. I like to take time to get to know a woman, and have several conversations with her.

[Phoe]

I know that a big part of your personal problems come down to motivation.

 

Getting the overall motivation together, so that you're motivated to do more general things rather than just find a gf, you will have an overall more pleasant life.

 

 

Yes, finding a gf is #1 for you, and many of us don't think that's a good decision, but that's the way it is for you and we know that won't change.

 

 

A lot of my own issues with motivation comes from feeling like there are SO many things that should be done, and I don't even know where to start. Even if it's simple things like "I have to get groceries, clean the fishtank, and do laundry today" rather than larger goals like "Be in a relationship, graduate school, start a career".

 

 

Keeping organized with my goals helps me. I create checklists. I have lists for things I need to do today. I have lists for things I want to do this month. I can put tasks in order from most important to least important, or easiest to tackle to hardest to tackle, or anything in between.

 

 

Creating lists, breaking things down, ticking things off the list as I get them done, helps keep me motivated and helps me from feeling overwhelmed.

 

 

You can even get a little silly with your list. Allocate an hour or 2 to play a video game. I remember you mentioning you didn't even have the motivation to play a game. So on days like that, make it a point on your to-do list, that you're gonna do something like that.

[pickflicker]

You think because you've managed to get a f2f, they're are no more issues for you to conquer?

 

Oh my Lord....

[somedude81]

I know that a big part of your personal problems come down to motivation.

 

Getting the overall motivation together, so that you're motivated to do more general things rather than just find a gf, you will have an overall more pleasant life.

 

 

Yes, finding a gf is #1 for you, and many of us don't think that's a good decision, but that's the way it is for you and we know that won't change.

 

 

A lot of my own issues with motivation comes from feeling like there are SO many things that should be done, and I don't even know where to start. Even if it's simple things like "I have to get groceries, clean the fishtank, and do laundry today" rather than larger goals like "Be in a relationship, graduate school, start a career".

 

 

Keeping organized with my goals helps me. I create checklists. I have lists for things I need to do today. I have lists for things I want to do this month. I can put tasks in order from most important to least important, or easiest to tackle to hardest to tackle, or anything in between.

 

 

Creating lists, breaking things down, ticking things off the list as I get them done, helps keep me motivated and helps me from feeling overwhelmed.

 

 

You can even get a little silly with your list. Allocate an hour or 2 to play a video game. I remember you mentioning you didn't even have the motivation to play a game. So on days like that, make it a point on your to-do list, that you're gonna do something like that.

Yeah, you and I have pretty different reasons when it comes to having trouble getting started.

 

I was thinking about making a thread on this subject.

 

The main reason for my lack of motivation, after my ex dumped me, is that I'm always feeling really tired. While I do get plenty of sleep, it's not quality and I frequently wake up in the middle of the night.

 

Then there is nothing I actually want to do. I woke up today at 7, realized that it's the first day of spring break, that I'm not going to go to class, and have nothing at all to look forward to today so I went back to sleep for an hour.

 

Ever since I woke up I have a persistent headache and just feel sluggish. I would spend the whole day in bed if I could. There just isn't anything that excites me right now.

 

Spring Break actually feels like some sort of punishment because I don't get to interact with any women. The only thing I actually enjoy right now is my dance classes. Everything else just kills time.

[somedude81]

You think because you've managed to get a f2f, they're are no more issues for you to conquer?

 

Oh my Lord....

What's a f2f?

[lollipopspot]

I wear cologne whenever I know I'm going to be around women.

 

I personally would recommend losing the cologne. I do not like artificial smells. But maybe that's just me.

 

Is it possible also that it's too strong? That WILL put off a lot of women, but no one will want to tell you. I think overall cologne is a net negative more than positive, unless you have one specific lady who likes it.

 

Spring Break actually feels like some sort of punishment because I don't get to interact with any women. The only thing I actually enjoy right now is my dance classes. Everything else just kills time.

 

There must be community dance classes and studios where you are. Sign up for more classes! Your skill is dancing, and it is also a skill which will be attractive to women who like to dance. You could probably be going to a dance class almost every day, for not much money.

 

Consider going on-line right now and seeing what you can find. Dancing seems like a way you can stay engaged with people.

[rester]

Yeah, you and I have pretty different reasons when it comes to having trouble getting started.

 

I was thinking about making a thread on this subject.

 

The main reason for my lack of motivation, after my ex dumped me, is that I'm always feeling really tired. While I do get plenty of sleep, it's not quality and I frequently wake up in the middle of the night.

 

Then there is nothing I actually want to do. I woke up today at 7, realized that it's the first day of spring break, that I'm not going to go to class, and have nothing at all to look forward to today so I went back to sleep for an hour.

 

Ever since I woke up I have a persistent headache and just feel sluggish. I would spend the whole day in bed if I could. There just isn't anything that excites me right now.

 

Spring Break actually feels like some sort of punishment because I don't get to interact with any women. The only thing I actually enjoy right now is my dance classes. Everything else just kills time.

 

A trick I use to motivate myself is to think about how I will feel after I do whatever it is that I don't want to do. If you can't motivate yourself to clean, think about how great it will feel once it's done. If you can't motivate yourself to exercise, think about how great you will feel when it's over.

 

It's these little things that build up confidence in yourself and make you feel good. Designate 30 minutes twice a week to your guitar. It's not much but it will help. When you get better at it, you will be more motivated to work on it more often. If you don't like it, find something else that interests you.

 

On another subject, have you ever considered becoming friends with a girl with a boyfriend and then hanging out with both of them? If you click with them, they in turn will introduce you to more people. What about the girl you mentioned that ran over to you to hug you? Girls don't do that if they don't like you. Become her friend and don't be afraid to be the third wheel with her and her boyfriend, as long as they welcome you.

 

Most of the time finding single women works out indirectly. The more people you know, the more people they will introduce you to. Weddings, parties, sports activities. Things that friends introduce you to.

 

Get out of your comfort zone. You mentioned that you've never been to a sit-down restaurant before. Try it! Go alone. Flirt with the waitress...not because you are trying to get a date, but because it is good for your confidence. You don't even have to put pressure on yourself to flirt...just go and see what happens. Maybe the server will be a grumpy old man. Maybe the food will suck. Who cares? That's life.

 

I once went to the movies by myself and a girl that was also by herself followed me in and sat down next to me. Nothing came of it, but we had a nice conversation. Build your social skills by practicing in real life.

 

Other posters here are only getting somewhat hostile because they spend a lot of time reading your threads and responding and you always have an excuse for why their advice is no good. You never seem to be appreciative of all the time people spend trying to help you.

 

I'm rooting for you, somedude. As crazy as this sounds, I've read every one of your threads (that took me MONTHS, by the way), and can relate to a lot of your problems.

[xxoo]

Spring Break actually feels like some sort of punishment because I don't get to interact with any women. The only thing I actually enjoy right now is my dance classes. Everything else just kills time.

 

You should know what I'm going to say about that by now.

 

You need friends! You'd have people to see over spring break. You'd enjoy yourself. You'd get out and maybe meet some new people, possibly some of them would be single women.

 

Have you tried a meet up group? A cooking class? Toast masters?

 

You should go to ONE event this week. What do you have to lose?

[topaMAXX]

I'd have to see you in person to see how the weight looks on you. Fat rolls are when the fat bunches up and folds in areas that it should not. Here's a good example.

 

Yes I do automatically rule out women I judge to be obese. I obviously don't know how much people weigh when I look at them. But if a woman has fat arms and fat rolls she gets ruled out, no matter how great her personality is.

 

I don't believe I'm being nitpicky at all. There are plenty of women out there who meet my bare minimum criteria. Just that the main problems is that the vast majority of men are interested in the same women that I am.

 

 

 

That's the thing, I'm not faking it. I truly am happy when I'm interacting with women. I'm not putting on a brave face. I'm too busy having fun to worry about my depression.

 

 

I have no problem talking about my flaws when a woman has earned my trust. I share lots of things, but not everything.

 

My ex knew I had some issues with anger and that I had some issues with motivation in doing homework, my dishes and cleaning. Stuff like that. But I never actually told her that I was depressed, how much she meant to me, or that I've ever contemplated suicide. Perhaps if we had been together for at least a year I would have told her the deeper things. For now I'm glad that I did not.

 

Honestly, dude, I think you should get away from the looks so much. As I'm getting older, I'm starting to realize that personality and character matter way more in a long term partner.

 

And I'm 5 years younger than you lol.

[somedude81]

I personally would recommend losing the cologne. I do not like artificial smells. But maybe that's just me.

 

Is it possible also that it's too strong? That WILL put off a lot of women, but no one will want to tell you. I think overall cologne is a net negative more than positive, unless you have one specific lady who likes it.

I don't wear a lot of cologne, I don't even know if anybody else can smell it.

 

There must be community dance classes and studios where you are. Sign up for more classes! Your skill is dancing, and it is also a skill which will be attractive to women who like to dance. You could probably be going to a dance class almost every day, for not much money.

 

Consider going on-line right now and seeing what you can find. Dancing seems like a way you can stay engaged with people.

I found a place that does swing dancing and I'm going to do that this week. That should be fun. Though they are a bit expensive at $15 per class. I hope there's people under 40 there.

 

There's a salsa club in my area and I'll be going there as well later on.