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Should I leave?


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Honeysuckle

Well This past Thursday night, I was working all night and husband was acting strange and kept posting a lot of Facebook statuses about wanting to go riding around and needing someone to go. He had been having a lot of anxiety attacks lately and I got worried about him. So I called him bc he was acting funny through texting or wouldn't text me back at all. Well when I called, he acted fine and just said he was out there by himself. Well when I got home from work and got on Facebook, he was still logged in and he had an unread message. So I did the nosy wife thing and clicked it. And I found several messages he had going on with a girl telling her that he thought he had feelings for her and maybe he didn't need to be married to me anymore and how when he saw her, his heart fluttered. She had wrote back saying she felt the same way blah blah blah. I then checked his text records and saw a number that he texted for three hours that night while ignoring me all night. I immediately confronted him and he lied. I asked him to end all contact with her and he told me no. I ended up leaving Friday afternoon and stayed at a friends. We talked Saturday morning and he still refused to stop talking to her and he was just getting home at 8am when I got there to talk to him. He swears he was out playing cards all night. We talked things out Saturday afternoon and he for some reason wanted me to stay at my friends one more night and come home the next day. I wasn't ready to give up on our marriage after this so I went back the next day. He agreed to not speak to her again and swore that they never saw each other and he only texted her. He also promised me that they had only ever been just friends, nothing physical. Well I've been a mess over this and I checked his phone records again last night. Of course another lie, he texted her all throughout the day on Sunday. So I checked his texts last night, and he had deleted the ones from her even though he swears they are just friends. Well I read some messages between him and his best friend and learned of two more lies #1 he has had sex with her in the past and #2 he did go see her that night and lied to my face about it. He told his friend that they just sat holding hands and talking about moving away to another town together. So I asked him again to tell me everything and he sitll denied it. So of course I check his phone records this evening and he was been texting this girl all day. And the best part is... He blames me for everything bc I told him I wasn't happy a couple months ago. And I told him this bc he was unemployed sleeping on the couch every night and until 3pm during the day. Refused to help with housework and treated me like his slave. Not to mention the fact that he is irresponsible with money and is the reason my house was foreclosed on bc he was always taking money from my accounts.... I now feel bad for wanting to leave bc he went to the doctor about his anxiety and they referred him to counseling. Which I think will help him if he will go. But I can't even see that happening. I just feel like I am leaving when he really needs me. But then I think about me and how I needed him and how much he let me down.

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Save yourself from this dead marriage. He has already left emotionally anyways. The only reason he says he will change his ways is because he still needs a roof over his head and financial support. He is just using you at this point.

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Honeysuckle,

 

I asked him to end all contact with her and he told me no.

 

Refused to help with housework and treated me like his slave. Not to mention the fact that he is irresponsible with money and is the reason my house was foreclosed on bc he was always taking money from my accounts....

 

he did go see her that night and lied to my face about it.

 

He blames me for everything bc I told him I wasn't happy a couple months ago. And I told him this bc he was unemployed sleeping on the couch every night and until 3pm during the day.

 

You are living with a selfish needy child, not a man.

 

Please get out of this before you end up broke, homeless and emotionally wrecked.

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Kick him out today. It's your place; you pay.

 

He looks like he wants to do whatever he wants and have you pay his way - that's no partnership.

 

He's been cheating and lying - not good qualities for any marriage.

 

You have your evidence - act accordingly, in your best interest.

 

He can go live with her - your life will be better off without this cheating mooch.

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Lies lies lies....what an ass. That is disgusting behaviour...he does not need you, care about your feelings, he's hurting you, lies, cheating, blaming you, sleeping on the couch. ..and you are worried he may need you? I rest my case.

 

 

I'm sad for you. This made me so sad.

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