JUDGEMENTLE PEOPLE/ RE AFFAIRS

[CONFUSED]

HI EVERYONE I HAVE JUST STARTED READING SOME OF THESE PROBLEMS. I WAS INTERESTED IN THE REPLIES TO TWO PEOPLE WHO WAS HAVING AFFAIRS WITH MARRIAD MEN. THESE TWO PEOPLE HAVE LEFT MESSAGES BECAUSE THEY ARE UNHAPPY CONFUSED THEY KNOW WHAT THEY ARE DOING IS WRONG BUT THEY KNOW THEY CAN'T STOP IT. ANY WAY ALL THEY GOT WAS ABUSE ABOUT BEING HOME WREACKERS AND HOW THEY HAVE NO MORALS. THESE AFFAIRS ARE NEVER PLANNED IF YOU ARE GOING TO GIVE ADVICE GIVE JUST THAT AND NOT ABUSE FOR YOU NEVER KNOW WHEN YOU COULD BE IN THE SAME POSITION AS THEM . NEVER SAY NEVER !!

[Tony T]

In at least one of the posts you are referring to, the person who posted was actually grateful for the advice, or judgements as you consider them. I have not seen a lot of posts here where people were judgemental of the person, mostly judgements are placed on the behavior. That is simply the nature of this forum.

 

If, in the opinion of those giving advice, a person is going about something the wrong way, then judgement is going to be placed on the behavior and rightly so. If advising a change in strategy, that is actually an implied judgement that what they are currently doing is wrong. I have rarely seen personal bashing and, when done, it is usually not meant to be that way. Those who come to a forum like this are basically good people. With the exception of one or two people who have popped in and out of this part of the web, people here do not believe in or condone personal bashing.

 

In one of the posts you mentioned, I was the first to reply and respected the person's wishes that she not be cut down for what she was doing. I stuck to giving the advice she requested...I was a good little boy. Subsequent posters lit into her butt...and those are the people she was most grateful to.

 

So, while I absolutely respect your post here, I do not think it was justified in the light of the fact that making judgements about behavior is part of why we are here...and the posters actually were appreciative.

 

You had no involvement in any of this and yet you seem to be the one who is actually most judgemental about things. I think that says more about you than about this forum or the advice people give here. I'm not cutting you down or judging you, just making a point. We are all growing, learning, and sometimes all of us need to look in a mirror.

 

Very best to you!!!

[STOP JUDGING]

I WAS ONE OF THE PERSON'S WHO CAME IN FOR ADVICE ABOUT A FRIENDSHIP WITH A MARRIED MAN . AND YOUR REPLY TONY WAS IF I REMEMBER RIGHT HAHAAHA GOOD ON !! excellent advice i thought at a time i was hurt and confused keep up the good work .

In at least one of the posts you are referring to, the person who posted was actually grateful for the advice, or judgements as you consider them. I have not seen a lot of posts here where people were judgemental of the person, mostly judgements are placed on the behavior. That is simply the nature of this forum. If, in the opinion of those giving advice, a person is going about something the wrong way, then judgement is going to be placed on the behavior and rightly so. If advising a change in strategy, that is actually an implied judgement that what they are currently doing is wrong. I have rarely seen personal bashing and, when done, it is usually not meant to be that way. Those who come to a forum like this are basically good people. With the exception of one or two people who have popped in and out of this part of the web, people here do not believe in or condone personal bashing.

 

In one of the posts you mentioned, I was the first to reply and respected the person's wishes that she not be cut down for what she was doing. I stuck to giving the advice she requested...I was a good little boy. Subsequent posters lit into her butt...and those are the people she was most grateful to. So, while I absolutely respect your post here, I do not think it was justified in the light of the fact that making judgements about behavior is part of why we are here...and the posters actually were appreciative. You had no involvement in any of this and yet you seem to be the one who is actually most judgemental about things. I think that says more about you than about this forum or the advice people give here. I'm not cutting you down or judging you, just making a point. We are all growing, learning, and sometimes all of us need to look in a mirror. Very best to you!!!