So most people think one night stands are okay?

[jay1983]

It seems ASG and I were seperated at birth...

 

Sometimes I think y'all radio each other on walkie talkie "girl I need back up, ONS page 7, roger" lol

[ASG]

Sometimes I think y'all radio each other a walkie talkie "girl I need back up, ONS page 7, roger that" lol

 

We just feel strongly about the same issues. So it makes sense that we end up backing each other up on some subjects, since we agree!

[GoreSP]

Sometimes I think y'all radio each other on walkie talkie "girl I need back up, ONS page 7, roger" lol

 

Crap!

Our cover is blown...

[dragon_fly_7]

Did you see the posts I was replying to when I said that?

 

Basically they were like "no way, I wouldn't have never done that" "she probably looked like the Sanford and Son lady." I got defensive, I was like "I have a pic if y'all want to see" to give the guys a better understanding of what she looked like. Then they would have been like "oh s**t, okay, I can see how this happened" Just to show them real quick, then take the pic off, not to make fun of her.

I didn't read the whole entire thread. Just saying there is a lot of female shaming that it's hard to believe most men's intention nowadays.

[SoonMyFriend]

Can't speak for everyone, but for me? No. I don't prefer sleeping around at all.

 

But I also will not settle into a relationship just for the sake of being in one. And I don't fall in love easily. It takes time and effort and it's not something that happens overnight. For ME! I'm honestly always baffled when people jump from relationship to relationship. That, to me, is unthinkable! I don't judge, I just actually, honestly, do not understand how it works.

 

Anyway, I have been single for 3 years now. I have dated a couple of guys, but mostly I have maintained FWB or had ONS.

Do bear in mind, though, that when I say ONS, I don't mean going to a bar to pick up someone to have sex with. I am too afraid of complete strangers being axe murderers to do that, so the people I sleep with I usually know, either through work or through friends. Some I've known for years.

 

But I do want to find that person. Heck, I wanna get married and have kids! The whole 9 yards!

 

I just don't think I need to go without sex in the meantime!

 

THIS X A MILLION

 

My backstory? I'm 29 and have had four ONS. None of them were with complete strangers. Like ASG, I am terrified of being chopped into tiny pieces. That, and I tend to think most men at bars at total creeps.

 

My four ONS all happened with people I knew prior, with the exception of the most recent but we met through friends and the same night had sex. He works out of town three weeks out of the month, so it was a bit of fun for a night. Two happened while on vacation. Another happened after a Christmas party LOL.

 

I spent most of my twenties in a relationship. ONE relationship. He was my first sexual partner for EVERYTHING. Then I broke up with him, and shortly after started dating someone else. We broke up after eight months this past summer. Incidentally, I didn't have sex with that boyfriend (I had issues with vaginismus in my LTR and I was terrified those issues would follow me and so I dealt with a fear of sex if you will in my new relationship).

 

 

After that breakup, I went on vacation, and reconnected with an old friend. We had a ONS at the end of the trip and it was the most liberating thing I have experienced sexually. To know I COULD have sex, and that I could ENJOY it was so eye opening.

 

 

I've been single since the summer, going out on dates here & there, but nothing to write home about. Haven't had sex since February. Don't see more sex on the horizon anytime soon.

 

 

Call me whatever you want, say I have no self respect or class or dignity, but my ONS actually gave me confidence and a whole new belief in myself I didn't think I would ever have. And that confidence will actually help me in my next relationship because I won't be terrified that I won't be able to please my partner in the ways I know he will want.

[Leigh 87]

Personally, I tried a few one nighters and I learnt that for me they were " not okay". They made ME feel awful and I didn't enjoy them, so I chose to not repeat behaviour that wasn't right TO ME.

 

However, I don't judge other people who have them. They are no less worthy than I am.

 

Having a ONS doesn't say much about a persons overall character.

[Eclypse]

My girlfriend had a one night stand while overseas last year (before dating me!). She said she wanted to see what it was like, and ended up not liking it. She said it didn't feel romantic or sexy or anything but she figured once you're halfway through having sex and committed to it you may as well see it though to the end!

 

I could never have a one night stand. I need an emotional connection to enjoy sex. I won't lie, it took me a little bit to accept that she just gave up sex like that to some guy she randomly met while drunk. In the end I just did and am not judging her for it. It happened before she began dating me after all.