Simon Phoenix Posted April 15, 2014 Share Posted April 15, 2014 Him having a new girlfriend isn't the issue. It just made me uncomfortable. Oh well, that's part of the territory when it comes to breakups. Link to post Share on other sites
Author TrishWick Posted April 19, 2014 Author Share Posted April 19, 2014 To keep things simple and short this is what happened. In late January I broke it off with my now ex-boyfriend of nearly 2 years. My interest level just started to drop off and I failed to communicate with him. A coworker of mine and I started talking normally and I just gravitated towards him. I realize now that I emotionally cheated. I didn't have it in me to do it in person so I called him to end things. Please, believe that I realize that it was a cold hearted and a b*tch move. At the time, I had to do what was right for me, for I wasn't happy. After a few days and weeks, I was happy. I did what I wanted and was with a guy that I genuinely liked. Now... call it guilt or whatever you like, I'm constantly thinking about my ex. He drives by my work on his commute to his school and work, and when I see his car it absolutely hits me. I wish to not feel this way. Parts of me want to go back to him, but I KNOW FOR A FACT it would be a huge fat no on his end. I'm not looking for pity, just advice on why I might feel this way and how I can get over it. Link to post Share on other sites
sooshi Posted April 19, 2014 Share Posted April 19, 2014 It probably is because you've been feeling guilty over the emotional cheating. Have you apologized for what happened? Part of you might want to go back to him to try to redeem what happened in the first place. I think you'll overcome this by forgiving yourself. You weren't completely aware/completely honest with yourself that you were emotionally cheating on him during the relationship. Now you are. Recognize that the world you make the mistakes is not the same world in which you've realized your mistakes and one in which you can practice forgiveness. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
AlphaC Posted April 19, 2014 Share Posted April 19, 2014 To keep things simple and short this is what happened. In late January I broke it off with my now ex-boyfriend of nearly 2 years. My interest level just started to drop off and I failed to communicate with him. A coworker of mine and I started talking normally and I just gravitated towards him. Parts of me want to go back to him, but I KNOW FOR A FACT it would be a huge fat no on his end. I'm not looking for pity, just advice on why I might feel this way and how I can get over it. So.... you drop your bf of 2 years because you were selfish and wanted to be with some other guy, you couldn't handle being in a relationship and did the selfish deed of breaking your ex's heart. Not only did you break his heart but you jumped into bed with another guy right away. How do you think your ex felt? He invested two years of his life and then while he is mourning the relationship you are moaning with a new guy in bed? Now, a couple of months later, the new guy is not all that and you realize what a prize your ex was. You, like most women, don't appreciate what you have until it's gone... You shouldn't contact him, you need to leave him alone. He sounds like a man of respect (fat NO in taking you back), I too would feel the same way. My advice is to accept your situation and take some time to work on your issues. By now your ex has probably healed (partially) and started to date (3 months is a long time to be waiting around for someone who dumped you). You should probably give it a couple of years and when you see him, his wife, kids and two dogs rolling up the block, tell him that you and your coworker have "broken up." 3 Link to post Share on other sites
Author TrishWick Posted April 19, 2014 Author Share Posted April 19, 2014 So.... you drop your bf of 2 years because you were selfish and wanted to be with some other guy, you couldn't handle being in a relationship and did the selfish deed of breaking your ex's heart. Not only did you break his heart but you jumped into bed with another guy right away. Trust me this coworker of mine wasn't the main reason why I left. Probably 4-5 months before the BU, I started to loose that "feeling." I tried my hardest to find it again. At one point I saw myself getting married to this guy. I was madly in love with him and would've given up ANYTHING for the relationship. Somewhere down the line things just changed. I guess I had a bette connection with my coworker. Things started to develop I guess. One thing during my previous RS was that my ex lived a more... social lifestyle. I'm not talking about going out a getting hammered, but he was more socially known than me. Everyone knew who he was, he was very outgoing, could start a conversation with a random stranger if he wanted. My family had a bit of resentment towards him that he didn't go to church. I guess I felt like I couldn't keep up and that my family was more important. My current bf is more reserved. Big into church which would be great with my family, not as out there as my ex, etc. Basically a 180. Don't get me wrong I'm not downing my RS right, now. It's just that I'm still getting used to it. I deserve the criticism I get for how I ended things. For the past few days, I just couldn't get him off my mind. Link to post Share on other sites
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