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Hi,

 

I was in love, long term relationship, then we broke up because of misunderstanding. 2 years during the breakup, she was dating and used me 5 times as an emotional support whenever there is a dispute with her mate- throwing all blame to me making me feel guilty while I try to get her back. I failed as she was fishing and put me as backup. Now, I want to revenge, curse her for everything she did to me putting me in this misery, but every time I heard about her, my rage will drop as I feel the pity in her. I am not a bad guy...

 

Now, I just realize that I am the one that cause all this mess and expelled her away from me. I am not asking for a 2nd chance. My mistake- I have to afford it.

 

Being selective, I have no goal, I am a loner for over 2 years now and I do not know what to do in life... I feel exhausted everyday. After work, I fall down in bed. I try to motivate myself by going out with friends playing sports, but whenever I am back alone, the feeling will come back and whatever she told me in stuck in my mind like a curse. Nothing can make me happy as the problem is from me, from my inside- really insecure.

 

When I was with her or with people, her/their happiness is my happiness > this is wrong. My happiness should be in priority. Where can I find it and how?

 

What should I do to live a normal life as before dating with this girl?

 

She or myself is ruining my life...

 

I apologize for the poor grammar...

Edited by organyx
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Just let time pass. Time can heal most of us, and eventually we emotionally move on, and meet other people. You may want to get a medical check-up since you indicated you are exhausted. Anemia can make people fatigued. You sound great, and I think in time things will get better.

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learning_slowly

Look at what interests you and join a club where others do it.

You don't know what interests you. Then choose anything, once you start doing it will teach you what you do like & you'll meet new people and ideas. It won't be easy, but that's why it'll be worth it. Good luck

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