li'l bunny Posted February 3, 2005 Share Posted February 3, 2005 I have a friend I met through my hubby. We always got on well and used to text each other a lot. In the past year he hasn't returned any of my phone calls or my texts. I managed to ask him at one stage if I did something to upset him but he said no. I sent him a text several months after that asking him why he wasn't answering any of my texts and that I missed his friendship. I really have no idea if I did something or not. It's really weird. He still rings my hubby and asks him to go out for a drink or to play poker but if my hubby says we want to go down and visit him he makes up some excuse so we can't go. We also invited him to dinner on a few occasions, even left the night up to him, and got negative reply each time. I haven't seen him in a year now pretty much. It does sound like I did something to upset him doesn't it? Should I just forget about his friendship? I just don't like thinking I did something to hurt someone. Any advice? Link to post Share on other sites
LucreziaBorgia Posted February 3, 2005 Share Posted February 3, 2005 It doesn't really matter at this point after a year why he isn't receptive to your friendship. There's no telling why - it could be anything from discomfort at being friends with someone else's wife or it could be that he just doesn't like you or enjoy your company. Whatever it is, he is making it as clear as he can that he doesn't want to be your friend and he is not forthcoming as to why so your best bet would be to put it behind you. Link to post Share on other sites
li'l bunny Posted February 3, 2005 Share Posted February 3, 2005 Thank you. But I don't think it's because he doesn't like me, unless he's changed his opinion of me recently. We have been friends for five years and always got on really well. He even said I was the type of girl he'd like to marry. He's still very friendly with my hubby and even if we aren't friends I don't want to feel uncomfortable around him if I bump into him. I don't think he'd be as horrible as ignoring me to my face but I would like to know what I did wrong. I mean, the last time I saw him was at his New Year's Eve party 2003/2004. We got on really well that night too... Link to post Share on other sites
LucreziaBorgia Posted February 3, 2005 Share Posted February 3, 2005 Originally posted by li'l bunny He even said I was the type of girl he'd like to marry. I expect that's your answer right there. It is probably wise that he stays away - maybe he knows that he can't be "just friends" with you. Maybe he feels a friendship with you isn't appropriate? Link to post Share on other sites
Pocky Posted February 3, 2005 Share Posted February 3, 2005 He even said I was the type of girl he'd like to marry. Imagine if you were close with your girlfriend's husband and felt this way towards him. Imagine if you felt so close that you could find yourself falling for him. Now what would you do? The right thing would be to end the friendship. If I were you, I'd make the assumption he was getting to close to me and didn't want to be in that position. I'd assume he decided that the best decision would be to stop being my close friend. Link to post Share on other sites
li'l bunny Posted February 3, 2005 Share Posted February 3, 2005 Maybe you're right but if so then I'll have no friends left. I had another really really close friend who says he feels awkward seeing me now because I'm married. He had the opportunity years before that to kiss me but he didn't because he valued our friendship too much, he obviously doesn't value it now! I always got on better with guys than girls and now I am seriously at a loss. I love male company - I'm not going to do anything with them I just really enjoy hanging out with them. Do men trust themselves so little that they'd be afraid to remain friends? Link to post Share on other sites
Pocky Posted February 3, 2005 Share Posted February 3, 2005 Originally posted by li'l bunny I always got on better with guys than girls and now I am seriously at a loss. I love male company - I'm not going to do anything with them I just really enjoy hanging out with them. Do men trust themselves so little that they'd be afraid to remain friends? Yes. Things can happen. That's the ubiquitous comment when someone has an affair. "It just happened.." Link to post Share on other sites
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