Mr Spock Posted February 5, 2005 Share Posted February 5, 2005 I don't think she was a "skank" I think she's an insecure person who gets off on heavy flirtation and male attention. Your husband hates her because instead of quietly going away she messed up his life. But he messed it up first. Dipping the wick in the company ink, so to speak. I personally don't feel that allowing him to indulge HIMSELF in blaming her is healthy for either of you. You blame her, you need that to remain with your husband fine. As long as you know you're doing it. But he doesn't get to blame her anymore stillhurting, otherwise he won't ever truly accept responsibility for his actions. Link to post Share on other sites
KellyBean18 Posted February 5, 2005 Share Posted February 5, 2005 Originally posted by StillHurtin LMBO KellyBean!!! Thank you for the laugh!!! If I were to do that I would know exactly who's name I would use, lol!!! But I wont do that b/c H wont find it too funny. You have enough to deal with girlfriend , so you give me "Zuke Boys" name ... Link to post Share on other sites
Author StillHurtin Posted February 5, 2005 Author Share Posted February 5, 2005 Originally posted by Mr Spock You should know that people who accuse their spouse of cheating all the time when they've got no grounds often are compensating for their own guilt. If he was doing this before he even met her I'd be worried about the true depth of his infidelity. Not to give you any more of a complex!! I'm just saying you need to forgive but not forget. Your husband found her attractive. Plain and simple. Attractive enough to sleep with even though he knew it would hurt you. The next time your husband says something derogatory about the OW simply say "Yes, and you had an affair with her so what does that say about you?" and leave it at that. I have been told that a lot Spock, about the accussing me of messing around was his own guilt. Years b4 the A even happened I finally got sick and tired of hearing 50 questions so I asked him why he thought I was cheating on him. He said that w/ my past (a lot of lovers) and that I was attractive he thought I would find someone better than him and leave him. He has his own insecurities w/ that. He is a good looking guy, and he does say things conceited about himself yet when it comes right down to it, he thinks he isn't good enough for me and he has said that on several occassions. Whether it's true or not I don't know. I hope he wouldn't lie about it. She isn't a skank b/c she gets off heavy on flirtation, she is a skank b/c of the way she looks and dresses. She is just nasty. Nothing about her is sexy. But I guess it didn't matter to H at the time, something about her turned him on. I know it wasn't her looks b/c he has never said she thought she was attractive. When I asked him why he would sleep w/ someone who is ugly he told me she wasn't ugly but not as attractive as I am. I don't think he blames her for the A so much, but he does blame her for getting him fired. Which by the way was just plain a$$ stupid on her part for turning him in compared to the crap she does. As for him sleeping w/ her, I use to give him s*** about it a lot. I have told him he must of been out of his mind. He agrees and tells me how ashamed he is for what he has done. Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts