mtnbiker3000 Posted April 25, 2014 Share Posted April 25, 2014 I think you've probably got some growing up to do before you get into another serious RS, creating fake profiles on FB and LS are not the actions of a mature person. Yes. You really need to address some issues before you get into another RS. Please take some time to reflect and grow before starting another. You will only find yourself in a similar situation again and again. Ask me how I know? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author susan1 Posted April 25, 2014 Author Share Posted April 25, 2014 I agree it was not mature but I let the curiosity get the best of me. And he was more honest to the account btw. He always told other ppl stuff but never me. Sorry but he had no balls lol. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted April 25, 2014 Share Posted April 25, 2014 I'll back down I didn't realize you were 19. Lots of people do dumb immature things when they are 19. Heaven knows I did. My point remains but I'll try to soften it. Making a fake profile -- lying -- is a bad idea. Closure is also a myth. Often times people can't articulate why they want to break up. Even if they know, they rarely want to be straight with the other person because they don't want to hurt them even more. Hence, the saying "It's cruel to be kind". In trying to protect you, they hurt you more by leaving you wondering. In this wonderful cyber age you have all sorts of more tools available to keep tabs on a EX because for whatever reason you just can't let go. Most of that is because you are trying to figure out what you did wrong (even when you didn't do anything) or what you could change to fix the relationship when you can't. When I was 19 about all we had was the old drive by. You'd get some friends together & use a car the EX wouldn't recognize to drive past the EX's house in the hopes of finding clues to what went wrong. It's not healthy but most people have done it & it's so much "easier" now with things like fake FB profiles. Just recognize that it's a bad, unhealthy thing. Link to post Share on other sites
Simon Phoenix Posted April 25, 2014 Share Posted April 25, 2014 What you did was immature and dumb, but I was immature and dumb when I was 19 so I'm not going to clown you too hard for this. Anything I would have said besides that has already been covered. Just never do something like that again -- never lower yourself. By intentionally deceiving him, you lowered yourself to his level. And honestly, you'll realize that the "why" doesn't really matter. Instead, focus on the result. You were dumped -- it's not like knowing the exact reason will make you undumped. In fact, a lot of times knowing the reason is worse than not knowing and moving on. I believe you when you say you don't want to be with him again, but to really grow and evolve and move forward, you need to forget the why. It's colored bubbles at this point. And sunny-eyes, take some laps. Talk about bringing nothing to the table. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Author susan1 Posted April 26, 2014 Author Share Posted April 26, 2014 And I'm not as immature as it seems on here. I did screw up n I feel bad. I had the opportunity at my finger tips so I thought why not ask. Wish I hadn't and I feel pathetic. What's worse tho is that he'll talk to random girls online about his private life, but not even look at me in person and fix the awkwardness we both hate. I'm perfectly happy being single right now cause I have a ton of goals I want to reach. I have no time and I want to focus on me right now. God will time it out n bring the guy in the picture when I'm ready/have time. And no way am I gonna settle for less than I deserve this time. I want a MAN not a boy. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Simon Phoenix Posted April 26, 2014 Share Posted April 26, 2014 And I'm not as immature as it seems on here. I did screw up n I feel bad. I had the opportunity at my finger tips so I thought why not ask. Wish I hadn't and I feel pathetic. What's worse tho is that he'll talk to random girls online about his private life, but not even look at me in person and fix the awkwardness we both hate. I'm perfectly happy being single right now cause I have a ton of goals I want to reach. I have no time and I want to focus on me right now. God will time it out n bring the guy in the picture when I'm ready/have time. And no way am I gonna settle for less than I deserve this time. I want a MAN not a boy. No, what you did was worse than him not talking to you. Stop trying to spin it. You screwed up, it's over, don't do it again. But don't come on here with the "yeah but" defense. The "yeah but" defense sucks. You can only control what you do, not what he does. Stop comparing. Live your life to be the best you, not to try to be a "slightly better" him. Link to post Share on other sites
Author susan1 Posted April 26, 2014 Author Share Posted April 26, 2014 Ok I shouldn't have said worse. My point is that it's not even worth trying to figure out anymore. All I can do is live my life n forget all those unanswered questions. Maybe one day we can be by each other and it'll be normal. If not, oh well I guess. I've tried to act nice n what not and he just remains the same. Too bad. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
KaliLove Posted April 26, 2014 Share Posted April 26, 2014 Ok I shouldn't have said worse. My point is that it's not even worth trying to figure out anymore. All I can do is live my life n forget all those unanswered questions. Maybe one day we can be by each other and it'll be normal. If not, oh well I guess. I've tried to act nice n what not and he just remains the same. Too bad. By jove I think she's got it! Excellent Susan..this is exactly what we've been trying to tell you. I'm so glad you listened and took our advice in. A lot of other, much older posters don't and they end up getting hurt again and again and again. Good for you. Link to post Share on other sites
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