just broke up

[nick]

my boyfriend just broke up with me over the phone on saturday. despite his insensitive way of doing this i love him and know that i want to spend the rest of my life with him. this is not going to happen right now but i want him to know that i still want to be with him when the time is right. this is one of my first relationships and i am not sure how to go about telling him this or if i should even do so.

 

i am really afraid of rejection and that he no longer wants anything to do with me. one of the last things that he told me was that he loved me so i hope that he meant it. that gives me some hope.

 

does anyone have experience with this or have any advice?

[Nic]

Hi Nick, this is Nic!!

 

I know exactly how it feels to have the person you love so much leave you. And it is always hard when they are one of your first loves. As the old saying goes, "the first love is always the hardest".

 

It hasn't been that long since my boyfriend broke up with me. I loved him very much, and it hurt like crazy, and it still does sometimes.

 

But at the moment, you are still at the stage where it is very raw, and the painful feelings are very intense. You will want to call him and beg and plead, and you will feel a certain desperation to let him know how you feel, but I would strongly advise against it. He broke up with you for a reason. It may only make things worse.

 

The best way to get him to come back to you (if he does), is to try your hardest to get on with your life. Do things with friends and do things for yourself. Resist the urge to contact him. If he doesn't hear from you, he may have the urge to call you. It may make him wonder....

 

I'm sure your boyfriend knows how much you love him. But sometimes, even the most loving relationships come to an end. Another cliche for you: "All good things must come to an end".

 

I would strongly advise you read Tony's post in response to "Confuse and Sad" (Sunday, 4 Feb).

 

Try to understand that the pain you are feeling is totally normal, and something that we all go through at some stage in our lives. But it does go away, and you will be happy again. It takes time, but you will get there.

 

Good luck to you :-)

 

my boyfriend just broke up with me over the phone on saturday. despite his insensitive way of doing this i love him and know that i want to spend the rest of my life with him. this is not going to happen right now but i want him to know that i still want to be with him when the time is right. this is one of my first relationships and i am not sure how to go about telling him this or if i should even do so. i am really afraid of rejection and that he no longer wants anything to do with me. one of the last things that he told me was that he loved me so i hope that he meant it. that gives me some hope. does anyone have experience with this or have any advice?