blind_otter Posted February 7, 2005 Share Posted February 7, 2005 I wasn't aware that excessive masturbation caused sexual difficulties. I masturbate a lot when I'm bored and I could still have satisfying sex. It's not about porn, ok, it's about addiction. Addicts lack the proper coping skills to deal with the stressors of everyday life, so they abuse a substance or repeatedly engage in a behavior that allows them to distance themselves emotionally from the previously mentioned stressors. If not porn, the addict would abuse some other substance/activity. Gosh dern it. And I think his erectile dysfunction was probably affecting his ego, and his performance anxiety affected the quality of the sex. Masturbation was the tool he used to distance himself from dealing with the situation. How did you initially react to his erectile problems? Did you berate him and belittle him and immediately blame porn? Did you try other tactics or encourage him to see a doctor? Link to post Share on other sites
mymojo Posted February 7, 2005 Share Posted February 7, 2005 Originally posted by blind_otter I wasn't aware that excessive masturbation caused sexual difficulties. I masturbate a lot when I'm bored and I could still have satisfying sex. It's not about porn, ok, it's about addiction. Addicts lack the proper coping skills to deal with the stressors of everyday life, so they abuse a substance or repeatedly engage in a behavior that allows them to distance themselves emotionally from the previously mentioned stressors. If not porn, the addict would abuse some other substance/activity. Gosh dern it. And I think his erectile dysfunction was probably affecting his ego, and his performance anxiety affected the quality of the sex. Masturbation was the tool he used to distance himself from dealing with the situation. How did you initially react to his erectile problems? Did you berate him and belittle him and immediately blame porn? Did you try other tactics or encourage him to see a doctor? Any discussion of his issues ends badly, the idea of him seeing a doctor was shot down immediatily and I was told if I wasn't happy with the sex as it is that I was more than free to get it elsewhere. Link to post Share on other sites
blind_otter Posted February 7, 2005 Share Posted February 7, 2005 Originally posted by mymojo Any discussion of his issues ends badly, the idea of him seeing a doctor was shot down immediatily and I was told if I wasn't happy with the sex as it is that I was more than free to get it elsewhere. No offense, but it seems like the main issue is that your dude was an a**h***.... Link to post Share on other sites
Podna Posted February 7, 2005 Share Posted February 7, 2005 I can’t think of any ‘normal’ man who would rather masturbate then be with his girl. That seems ludicrous to me. I would probably just let him go and find someone else who can be with you and not his hand. Porn is not a bad thing and neither is masturbation but he is dysfunctional, so trade him in for a better model. A note about masturbation: I find that sometimes masturbating can make me a better lover. Allow me to explain. I can normally ejaculate twice without too much trouble during the course of lovemaking. The first usually comes (no pun) really quick, maybe the first 10 min or so, but the second can take as long as I want it to because I have complete control over it, and it stays hard so long as the women keeps me excited (which normally isn’t too difficult). Sometimes when I am with a woman for the first time (or first few times) I am embarrassed by how fast I will ejaculate the first time especially if I am really turned on by the girl. At times like that I will take a shower and give myself a little pre-game spanking to get the first blast out of the way. Then I come in and perform at the top of my game because I stay hard and don’t ejaculate until the woman is well taken care of. So masturbation can be good. Or perhaps I am a sick puppy, but I have happy ladies at home. Link to post Share on other sites
Hund1976 Posted February 7, 2005 Share Posted February 7, 2005 At times like that I will take a shower and give myself a little pre-game spanking to get the first blast out of the way. Then I come in and perform at the top of my game because I stay hard and don’t ejaculate until the woman is well taken care of. You gotta do what you gotta do to accomplish the mission. As for the poster if your man says to go get it somewhere else then you should take him up on that offer. No guy who really loved you would ever say that. So kick his ass to the curb and remember, a hard man is good to find! Link to post Share on other sites
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