C0nfused1980 Posted April 27, 2014 Share Posted April 27, 2014 Hello! Reading all the posts on this forum has been great and has helped me immensely with my break up which happened early this year. My ex bf and I remained NC for a while so that we could both cool off. We broke up after a lot of fights and arguments and looking back, I wish I had been calmer and not lost my temper but it happened and in the end, we just couldn't take it anymore and I told him I want to end it (out of anger) but he agreed. Initially we remained in touch but that led to us trying to work things out while we were both angry which then resulted in him this time telling me it is over. Fast forward 3 months, we have patched up (only as friends) but he told me he misses me and I told him I miss him. I still have strong feelings for me and I can tell he does too. We have been hanging out and talking quite a bit for the past couple of weeks, but only as friends though I can tell there's still something there for him as well. He has been going out of his way to be very nice and caring and supportive and I have too and besides the fact that we are not doing anything physical, we may as well be in a relationship. Last night, we went to a party together and I got a bit drunk and when he dropped me home, he gave me a hug but I ended up kissing him - probably big mistake!! - it was very brief but he did not pull back either. This morning, I messaged him and he said I have nothing to apologize for and I went ahead and told him that I do have feelings for him and missed him and was drunk which led to this. He said no problem, it happens and we have a day of drinking ahead, haha (we were supposed to hang out today with some other people at the beach). I (again probably a mistake) asked him if he really wants me to let go and move on and just be friends? And he did not reply to that message. I had told him I would meet him at the beach so I went there and he acted normal, as if nothing ever happened. The day went by and in the evening when we were sitting alone for a bit I asked him if he got my message and he said he did. And I asked so...? And he said he is feeling very emotional and literally ran away. He continued acting a little flirtatious for the rest of the evening and was still very nice but I am really not sure what is going on here. Even afterwards, we were still sending messages back and forth. Do you guys think he genuinely just wants to be friends and has moved on and I am just reading too much into everything because I want him back? Or could there be something there? Thank you all!! Link to post Share on other sites
Marco Valerio Posted April 28, 2014 Share Posted April 28, 2014 Hi C0nfused1980: Well…I think his feelings towards you are 70% friendship and 30% romantic feelings. If he really wanted you back as a GF he would be clearer with his words or actions. For sure there are some of those romantic feelings inside his heart…but they are not the majority right now. You should try to move on in that sense, keep the friendship and maybe when he sees you moving on… Lots of luck. Link to post Share on other sites
mangetout Posted April 28, 2014 Share Posted April 28, 2014 I think it's a bad mistake that you are friends with him. He sounds confused and is no longer sure if he wants to be romantically linked to you. I would personally back off as I see you getting hurt from this. Maybe when he misses you it may rekindle the love he felt before? Link to post Share on other sites
Author C0nfused1980 Posted April 29, 2014 Author Share Posted April 29, 2014 Yep, I think the same as you guys. I think it's more friendship but some feelings are there too. Only thing is, why didn't he then tell me to let go and move on? Regardless of this, I would still want him in my life as a close friend and he knows this as he is really a great person. So why not just tell me yeah just let it go? Is it just in case in the future he may want something? Or that he doesn't want to hurt my feelings? Link to post Share on other sites
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