newby Posted February 5, 2005 Share Posted February 5, 2005 how come everyone who walks away from mm seem to walk away a loser? surely theres a way to walk away as a winner. make them pine and make them feel they have lost something. take the power back. Link to post Share on other sites
Mr Spock Posted February 5, 2005 Share Posted February 5, 2005 Yeah. Power is about perception. If you perceive you're losing by walking away then you're not in the right frame of mind to be successful. What you REALLY want to say is "How do I get him to miss me so horribly he publicly comes crawling to me on hands and knees begging for my hand?" Fantasy allows us to continue on as if we were normal. But it's just fantasy. So get it out of your head. He'll miss you alright, the sex, the companionship, the mystery, the verbotenness of it all-but not enought to leave. Link to post Share on other sites
newby Posted February 5, 2005 Share Posted February 5, 2005 well thats quite sharp spocky, but not completely spot on. i dont want him to leave but youre right i do want him to miss me, isnt that just human? Link to post Share on other sites
lynnered Posted February 5, 2005 Share Posted February 5, 2005 what is giving you that impression?is that how you think you're going to feel ? all your hearing alot of is people saying how they're going to miss someone and thats normal youre not hearing the positives if he don't miss you then it wasn't as good for him as for you or he's a selfish loser. my xmm ,i know he misses me I've nc a few other times ,i know how much i mean to him,i can see it, hear it,& feel it from him when we were together, but who cares ,you care right ? another self esteem issue i think and if you keep giving in whenever you nc what chance are you giving him to miss you. inside you should know you're the best and its his loss don't sit around worrying if he misses you ,how attractive is someone who's whole world revolves around him ,and sits around doing nothing but thinking of how to please him how to make him love me analyzing everything ,focus on you and stop baseing your happiness on what someone else thinks of you ,or if you have a man in your life . Link to post Share on other sites
Mr Spock Posted February 5, 2005 Share Posted February 5, 2005 Originally posted by newby well thats quite sharp spocky, but not completely spot on. i dont want him to leave but youre right i do want him to miss me, isnt that just human? How can he miss you if you don't go away? Fantasizing that he's in agony over you is TOTALLY human, but like I said above simply fantasy. What you want is validation, and it's doubtful you'll get it. It's doubtful you'll ever get what you need from this. Link to post Share on other sites
newby Posted February 5, 2005 Share Posted February 5, 2005 yes thanks i know youre right. i dont think i was admitting to myself how much i depend on this. i know its not attractive. i dont know whats become of me. so spocky can i just ask you are you actually involved with somebody and accepted and know your place. or are you an ex o/w? do you think i should just delete him? aaah i feel really pathetic, i know how i must sound Link to post Share on other sites
Mr Spock Posted February 5, 2005 Share Posted February 5, 2005 You can read through my post history if you go to the search page. Haven't been posting much about my situation because simply I"m tired of talking about it. I don't know my place. Never have, never will. What I want is a valid relationship. Will I get it? Probably not. But not quite ready to quit trying yet. Link to post Share on other sites
newby Posted February 5, 2005 Share Posted February 5, 2005 i see, i read lots of your first posts. have you yet revealed your feelings etc? it seems that everybody on here is trying to find THE way if you know what i mean: the perfect attitude, the perfect expectation, the perfect way to make their situation different, the perfect way to end it. it is so sad, what tf is wrong with us? Link to post Share on other sites
Leaf Posted February 5, 2005 Share Posted February 5, 2005 Originally posted by Mr Spock What I want is a valid relationship. Will I get it? Probably not. But not quite ready to quit trying yet. Me too.. and on that note.. I will eat another cookie. Link to post Share on other sites
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