namastemeow Posted May 20, 2014 Share Posted May 20, 2014 dontgiveuponme, do u still rmb me? I haven't been on LS for awhile and wow your thread has so many posts now! I'm not counting the no. of NC days now, it makes me sick. On the 14th it suddenly hit me that it has been 10 days. AND I GET NOTHING FROM HIM, NOTHING AT ALL! It hurts so bad Doesn't he miss me just a little bit? Why is he so cold now? I know if I contact him he'll reply me, but I don't feel like doing it, he should be the one contacting me right... It's crazy thinking about all these... omg same here. I keep wondering if he misses me after all this time being together. Im so lost Link to post Share on other sites
Author dontgiveuponme Posted May 20, 2014 Author Share Posted May 20, 2014 This2shallpass he leave me a message in fb last friday asking how am i and i replied to him im good which i regret..Those breadcrumbs wont change anything unless u will heard the magic word.I go back to NC and i dont count the days anymore namastemeow everything will gonna be ok..Im feelin better for 4 days now,im still sad but in a different way.Everyone here is right NC is the best thing to do.At first im scared that if i do that he will forget about me but then u cant control thier feelings,u cant change thier mind by pleading and begging w/c i did and its pathetic. Feel free to vent here guys i wont get tired to listen ive been there before and all i need is someone to listen to me but no one did.So i know how it feels. big hugs to all of you 2 Link to post Share on other sites
sybo24 Posted May 20, 2014 Share Posted May 20, 2014 This past week is really hard for me.I hate to wake up in the morning because thats the time it hurts the most its like something died and will never gonna come back , that pain in your heart, the emptiness its really painful and then i miss him so bad. At this time im are so vulnerable and want to reach out my ex and pour my heart out. Its hard to fight it and so i just talk to some of my friends on facebook just to resist the urge but i feel like they are fed up on me for ranting over and over again. I cant remember the good and bad memories we had.What hurts the most is that you feel like you lost your hope and dreams.Your scared of the future because you will face it alone and its so dark and you cant see it. Im scared i cant find someone again that i cant have that deep connection,that chemistry i had with him. Im scared of everything and that hurts me the most.I dont know what to do. i keep myself busy and i go out with friends but even when im with them there are times it feels like someone stab me in the heart and i keep quiet for a few moment even when everyone is laughing at someones joke and i was there holding back my tears i really hate it. Loggon on this morning and your post was the first I read. I could have wrote this, you have described my feelings exactly. I try and take each day as it comes and am trying really hard to focus on the good things in my life. My wonderful healthy children. The fact that I (for now) don't have any money worries. I have a holiday to look forward to. Great friends, although most are in happy relationships and cant understand the feelings I have. Keep strong, time is a healer, or that's what I am hoping for. Your not on your own and there is someone out there who is just waiting for you to heal so that they can come into your life and wash away all the hurt. Sending you big love xx 1 Link to post Share on other sites
sybo24 Posted May 20, 2014 Share Posted May 20, 2014 . Most of the people around me don't have a clue about the inner pain I feel, although I shouldn't feel anything except anger for being used, but I can't really feel that way for some reason. Johnson_j you have summed up exactly what I feel. Why cant I be angry and hate the person who I trusted with everything but hurt me so much. Life would be easier if I felt the angry. Maybe it will come. Sending you a big hug xx Link to post Share on other sites
johnpatric Posted May 20, 2014 Share Posted May 20, 2014 I agree with the 3rd paragraph most. It takes long to build good memories, but only a minute to break them all together. What you have to do is, you have to do what is most important in your life. You have to remain alive, and you have to still care about something that happens around. I agree with this.. And You have your own life so you also have to focus on that.. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author dontgiveuponme Posted May 20, 2014 Author Share Posted May 20, 2014 sybo24 and johnpatric I agree with you guys time heals all wounds im feeling much better for the past few days now still sad but i can control compare before.I saw him adding more girls in my city and liking their pics,before i get really jealous and hurt me but now the more he do it the lesser i care.One day he will regret what he lost,that the grass is not always greener on the other side.That all girls are jealous and moody and i know some girls that are worst than me. he blames me for being too jealous and i accept it and learn from it.but he will never gonna see it because someone out there is more worth it. big hugs to all 1 Link to post Share on other sites
this2shallpass Posted May 20, 2014 Share Posted May 20, 2014 @dontgiveuponme As you know i went completely NC... and I think it was on the 5th day or NC he had written me a bunch of times on skype, that i didnt saw, telling me to answer him, and then he texted me..i answered him, the FOOL i was...i am not sure why he wrote me. He said he became angry with me for reacting the way that i did by not talking to him when i found the instagram stuff, and was imagining the whole day what i was "probably" doing when i wasnt answering him. He said he was sorry and never emotionally or physically cheated on me...and I didnt believe him, and kept "going" at it..and he ignored me again... of course. And I wrote him a heartfelt msg last night, when he suddenly stopped answering, which was my goodbye, and i got to say what i wanted..he didnt answer of course, the cold SOB. Back to NC. I was so much better with that, but of course he had to write me and mess it all up again, and suddenly I was back to square 1. Why did he do that, it feels just to torture me. Be mean to me, honestly. @namastemeow Try NC, I promise you you will feel better, its hard, i know, but you will feel better. Just try it...set yourself a goal, a short term goal, try to go NC to like the weekend..and suddenly you are there, and you feel better, and can go longer. Link to post Share on other sites
Author dontgiveuponme Posted May 20, 2014 Author Share Posted May 20, 2014 This2shallpass Hes keeping you on the sidelines,making sure your just there - a backup plan...Its like my ex told me "we may end our relationship right now but doesnt mean we wont be together anymore in the future" thats a torture for me. And pouring your heart out wont change their mind but an ego boost for them 1 Link to post Share on other sites
this2shallpass Posted May 20, 2014 Share Posted May 20, 2014 @dontgiveuponme I know thats exactlyy how he thinks, he wants to "Keep me there on the sideline" cause i know he thinks about being with me in the future when his life is a little more calm, and work isnt that crazy.. torture. I told him to never contact me again. I dont think I gave him any ego boost, cause I said that i was disappointed in me and in him for thinking he was "all that" and that I really got fooled etc and he turned out to be something completely different.. etc. Ugh..i want to move on and not feeling sad and down and feel like i am losing the love of my life. all though i know in my head that he isnt good for me. Link to post Share on other sites
cenz Posted May 20, 2014 Share Posted May 20, 2014 This is exactly how i feel..having difficulties to eat, constant cold hands and feet, and morning and night are the worse...i used to wake up with his text every morning..this is really hard..why everyone need to go through such awful thing in life.. I agree with the 3rd paragraph most. It takes long to build good memories, but only a minute to break them all together. What you have to do is, you have to do what is most important in your life. You have to remain alive, and you have to still care about something that happens around. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
this2shallpass Posted May 20, 2014 Share Posted May 20, 2014 @cenz i am there with you. its soo hard. and the text every morning.. ugh.. but after some days it will get better, and you wont get that punched feeling in the chest when you see you havent gotten any text when you look at your phone in the mornings. Link to post Share on other sites
namastemeow Posted May 21, 2014 Share Posted May 21, 2014 @namastemeow Try NC, I promise you you will feel better, its hard, i know, but you will feel better. Just try it...set yourself a goal, a short term goal, try to go NC to like the weekend..and suddenly you are there, and you feel better, and can go longer. I know i am trying its day 10 and i feel terrible i feel lost miserable . Getting back to the old routine, just work and gym since i have no friends most of them are married and busy with their own life. On weekends i just sit at home doing nothing now. Some of his bestfriend keep telling its because he is too stressed because hes homesick and he tends to push people away. And i should give him time. I dont know if i can do this.....But i am trying 1 Link to post Share on other sites
namastemeow Posted May 21, 2014 Share Posted May 21, 2014 namastemeow everything will gonna be ok..Im feelin better for 4 days now,im still sad but in a different way.Everyone here is right NC is the best thing to do.At first im scared that if i do that he will forget about me but then u cant control thier feelings,u cant change thier mind by pleading and begging w/c i did and its pathetic. Feel free to vent here guys i wont get tired to listen ive been there before and all i need is someone to listen to me but no one did.So i know how it feels. big hugs to all of you how long have you been NC? Im scared of doing that, scared that he will forget me. I dont want him to forget me 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author dontgiveuponme Posted May 21, 2014 Author Share Posted May 21, 2014 namastemeow ive been trying to do NC since last month but i always break it because im scared if ill do that he will forget about me and thinking he will find another girl is unbearable. Like you im hoping he will come back that he just dont know what he wants at the moment ,that he is just too stressed like what he said but no...The relationship is dead already.We talk 2 weeks ago he blames me for being too jealous.So i said sorry and tried to do strict NC but last friday he leaves me a message asking how am i and i dont want to be rude just for the sake of the relationship we had before i reply casually.Until now i didnt break NC. Aside from fighting the urge to message him im also trying not to fb stalk him coz i know it will just gonna hurt me badly.Right now i. feeling a lot better,NC do wonders.Stop thinking that if you do NC he wil forget you.If he really loves you then he will contact you,you cant change his mind. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
namastemeow Posted May 21, 2014 Share Posted May 21, 2014 namastemeow ive been trying to do NC since last month but i always break it because im scared if ill do that he will forget about me and thinking he will find another girl is unbearable. Like you im hoping he will come back that he just dont know what he wants at the moment ,that he is just too stressed like what he said but no...The relationship is dead already.We talk 2 weeks ago he blames me for being too jealous.So i said sorry and tried to do strict NC but last friday he leaves me a message asking how am i and i dont want to be rude just for the sake of the relationship we had before i reply casually.Until now i didnt break NC. Aside from fighting the urge to message him im also trying not to fb stalk him coz i know it will just gonna hurt me badly.Right now i. feeling a lot better,NC do wonders.Stop thinking that if you do NC he wil forget you.If he really loves you then he will contact you,you cant change his mind. His friends said its what have always happen, when he got too stressed he push people away and take time to be sure about everything. today he message me and i said it kills me to see couples around me knowing that i am alone. he replies "same" few days ago he asked me to give him time. his friend said if i care for him i should keep fighting because he's fragile so we have to understand that. but i dont know. im trying to nc but he message me. Link to post Share on other sites
this2shallpass Posted May 21, 2014 Share Posted May 21, 2014 namastemeow ive been trying to do NC since last month but i always break it because im scared if ill do that he will forget about me and thinking he will find another girl is unbearable. Like you im hoping he will come back that he just dont know what he wants at the moment ,that he is just too stressed like what he said but no...The relationship is dead already.We talk 2 weeks ago he blames me for being too jealous.So i said sorry and tried to do strict NC but last friday he leaves me a message asking how am i and i dont want to be rude just for the sake of the relationship we had before i reply casually.Until now i didnt break NC. Aside from fighting the urge to message him im also trying not to fb stalk him coz i know it will just gonna hurt me badly.Right now i. feeling a lot better,NC do wonders.Stop thinking that if you do NC he wil forget you.If he really loves you then he will contact you,you cant change his mind. I feel exactly the same, I want to do full NC, but I am scared that he will then forget about me completely..and find a new girl etc.. ugh. I know I stressed him out, and that he needs "his space" sometimes, and he has a lot going on in his life, and then pushed mee out. Which is really unfair. He isn't nice to me at all now though, its clearly, or at least it seems like it, that he doesnt give one f*** about my feelings. Because of that I have to have a strict NC. I wish I was where you are, that I could let the relationship "go"..and come to terms with that its dead. I haven't unfortunately. I am just waiting for it to happen "naturally" after some time when I start feeling better and forgetting him because of NC.. Link to post Share on other sites
Author dontgiveuponme Posted May 21, 2014 Author Share Posted May 21, 2014 This2shallpass At first i cant let go,deep inside im still hoping that we will be back together,that he still loves me.But im stalking him on fb last week and i saw he's crazy over this girl from my city.Keep liking her status and pics and she also do it to him so i guess thats it.Whether shes a rebound or not the fact is he's done with us. I actually cry for a half an hour today because im missing him so much but i feel a lot better after. Your not alone.You cant bring back the past we got no choice but to move forward.Waiting for him wont do you any good. Before i dont know how to let go when other people said i need to.Its hard but one day you'll wake up and you just let go and you kill that little hope in your mind.When you know enough is enough.Im preparing my mind bout the possibility of me finding out he will gonna have a new gf soon its hard but i need to. Link to post Share on other sites
this2shallpass Posted May 21, 2014 Share Posted May 21, 2014 @dontgiveuponme Yea, cause I have that hope...that we will be back together, that he really and still loves me. Luckily he doesnt have a facebook, but an instagram thats private. Thankfully. I try my best to not go on and see if he started following someone else, cause I know it will only be girls. Thats what we always fought about. Good that you stopped doing that, it does you no good..only pain. No matter what. sorry that you cried, I did that yesterday too, and i tear up randomly during a day, and when you really get to cry you do feel a lot better afterwards actually. To let all of your feelings out. I cant baare the thought of him being with someone else now. The warning signs of what he is, and could act, be so cold, was always there, i ignored it, and thought he could change etc... oh well, when you know better you do better. i need to do better next time. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
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