Is there any hope?

[Mx10]

Hi,

 

I'm a guy in my late 20's who happens to have a question regarding a woman in her early 40's who I've been in contact with for months. I've known for a long time, and she's a colleague but not in the same office, we sms:ed frequently and dated but only once, it went well that time and we continued with intimate/romantic messages but I hesitated to go for a second date so the whole thing just went downwards, fewer messages but the real problem was my negative view on one of her pictures that she sent me, she said "here's a sexy girl for you" and on the photo was a ugly man, I asked her why she was posting this, she sent another one saying "don't be so picky, choose one", my reaction was unfortunately negative, I found it to be quite disturbing even though she wrote "don't you understand it's a joke, do you really think that I'd like to offend you?" I replied that she had some kind of an intention and that it was low of her doing so, after that our conversations became even fewer, I congratulated her on her birthday and lately I also wrote a poem to her explaining my affection and asked her out through email, however, her reply was "I don't know, I just don't want to start something which I'm very insecure about" I didn't reply to that, 2 days later she sent me another mail asking how I am, I replied "thanks, how about yourself, listen about seeing each other, I just want to talk about us and your insecurity which is important to me", after that the whole thing reached to a point where she hasn't answered in 5 days, I have drowned in such a emotional pain and suffers a lot, I constantly check my phone at work and I just don't know how to cope with this, I'm constantly blaming myself for y chances with her in the past. I'm madly in love with her and if there was anything I could do to reverse this I'd do it, now with this story in mind I'd like to ask your point of view on this matter and how much of a possibility there is to start a relationship with this woman, I really appreciate it.

 

Best,

M