Does online dating work? What has been your experience?

[Smthn_Like_Olivia]

I did online dating for about 8 months before I met my guy. He was on it for a day. I went on a lot of dates, and it the beginning, it was more for fun than finding a serious relationship. I found that I got better results when I initiated contact with those I was interested in, instead of the other way around. When it got tedious or disappointing, I would hide my profile and take a break for a few weeks.

 

My guy and I have been together 6 months now and I couldn't be happier.

[Keenly]

If you're getting to that stage on the OLD saite then you're doing it wrong.

Why haven't you met all 8 of these girls already?

Go for the MEET... make it real ASAP. That is why they are fizzling out... that's not "how it works", that's the obvious result of your lack of action to transform the OLD chatting into a real life meeting.

 

I'm not the type of person that's going to ask for a meet up after one or two volleys of messages. I need to make sure I have some actual interest in some one before I even consider doing that.

[Targetlock]

Very mixed results, a year and an half of trying resulting in a couple of 'almosts' where I thought where I was a getting somewhere only for it to full apart, and one slightly strange date. Can feel like a lottery sometimes.

[SoonMyFriend]

I didn't like OLD. I tried it two different times and had success in that I went on dates, none of them were BAD dates, they were just with guys I didn't click with.

 

I find OLD very tiring. All the constant messaging, and LONG messages, and writing long profiles where the tiniest detail can sometime turn a person off, and I also hated getting bombarded with messages from people I had no interest in talking to. It takes like a MONTH of this crap to set up a single date.

 

That's why Tinder is where it's at. Quick messages, only mutual interests can contact you, and you set up dates quickly. No wasting my time.

 

I've been on 3 Tinder dates already, and will probably have at least 3more next week. I would have had dates this week but I have been swamped at work putting in overtime so I couldn't fit it into my schedule.

 

Tinder FTW! OLD you suck.

[MissBee]

I been doing online dating on and off for a couple years now and haven't had much luck. I only met very few men online and I'm at the point where I don't want to return to online dating ever again and trying to meet people in real life. The hard part about that I don't how to approach men with confidence.

 

I signed up for OLD this year after swearing off it.

 

Within a month or so I met my guy and before him I had one date that was cool.

 

I had joined two sites and one of them, I got messages but besides two that I remember, and a couple people I messaged, I never got much out of that site.

 

The other site, I had more promising people, went on two dates, the latter of which became my bf.

 

4 years before I also tried OLD and met my then bf after about 6 months of being on the site and as I was ready to give up, literally, I go to delete my page, he messages me.

 

OLD isn't magic. I think it's a good way to have access to people you could potentially date, more so than real life IMO. In theory many women and men who are single exist but when you're at school, work, getting on with life it is often unclear how to date these people or find them, even though they are "around." OLD removes the guess work and lets you know who is looking and open. It's not a magic product though. In real life, let's say the past two years, I've had dates about 3 times with men I've met out and about and I've exchanged numbers maybe a dozen or so times with men whom I ultimately never ended up going out with as either further convo found them lacking or they flaked, then I get hit on often by men who are in no way worth my time. I find online comparable, esp if you have standards. I get hit on often, most aren't worth my time. I will have a few successful dates, this time, 1 date who was decent, it was fun but no chemistry, the second, my bf. Then exchanged numbers with a few people who seemed promising but they flaked or after talking a bit more it fell apart.

 

I knew exactly what I was looking for and knew it wouldn't be common....so I went into OLD with that mentality. I also was giving it a try reluctantly so gave myself 3 months, luckily I ended up meeting my guy after 1 month or so and he had rejoined for a week or so before he met me (lucky bastard lol ). But I was fully prepared for the chance that I wasn't going to immediately find a suitable partner. But it worked in the sense that I was actively meeting men I'd not have met otherwise...but just like real life, not because you meet a lot of men means most are people you'll date. You have to realistic and use it for what it's worth. Some patience is required and also finding sites which seem more suitable for you.

[PegNosePete]

I'm not the type of person that's going to ask for a meet up after one or two volleys of messages. I need to make sure I have some actual interest in some one before I even consider doing that.

Well if you carry on doing what you've been doing, you'll keep getting the results you've been getting

Up to you bro.

[Valen]

I didn't like OLD. I tried it two different times and had success in that I went on dates, none of them were BAD dates, they were just with guys I didn't click with.

 

I find OLD very tiring. All the constant messaging, and LONG messages, and writing long profiles where the tiniest detail can sometime turn a person off, and I also hated getting bombarded with messages from people I had no interest in talking to. It takes like a MONTH of this crap to set up a single date.

 

That's why Tinder is where it's at. Quick messages, only mutual interests can contact you, and you set up dates quickly. No wasting my time.

 

I've been on 3 Tinder dates already, and will probably have at least 3more next week. I would have had dates this week but I have been swamped at work putting in overtime so I couldn't fit it into my schedule.

 

Tinder FTW! OLD you suck.

 

I was looking up Tinder a few days ago because I wasn't sure what it was like. From what I gather, I think it makes a lot more sense than OLD. It sounds a lot closer to real life interaction. You see someone you like psychically (their pic) and if they also like your pic, then Tinder allows you to contact each other. That's clever in a way that it cuts away the unnecessary trash messages from people you aren't interested in. You two get to know each other through txting instead of reading each other manufactured dating profile. A lot like how real life you approach someone you are interested in and start chatting. Profiles does not accurately demonstrate a person's personality but chatting with them you get a better feel. So I agree with you, Tinder is definitely a better alternative to OLD in meeting people locally.

[Keenly]

Well if you carry on doing what you've been doing, you'll keep getting the results you've been getting

Up to you bro.

 

Its alright with me. Take me as I come or not at all.

[HappyLove]

I've noticed a pattern on here with women who have found success with OLDing the guys who became their boyfriend were only on for a very short time like a day or week. Maybe you lucked out with a guy who was new to the OLDing world and hasn't had time to establish GIGS. Very interesting.

[Keenly]

I've noticed a pattern on here with women who have found success with OLDing the guys who became their boyfriend were only on for a very short time like a day or week. Maybe you lucked out with a guy who was new to the OLDing world and hasn't had time to establish GIGS. Very interesting.

 

Are you subtly Implying that OLD causes GIGS ? Cause I've been trying at OLD for a year and a half, and I can tell you right now the last thing I would ever be thinking about is the color of the grass some where else.

[Sunfire73]

I had success too. Met my now 9 months bf OLD at Match. We were both on there less than 2 months. Favorited him and he messaged me and it's been great so far. I think yes, the good ones (guys), get taken quickly.

[mammasita]

I met my BF on line. He was on for maybe a month or so and had gone on a few dates before me. I had done OLD on and off for a while. I was doing the on-line thing before my ex-fiance with no luck (I didn't meet him thru OLD).

 

I'm very happy right now. We've been inseparable (so to speak, you know - work, kids etc) since the day we met in September. Any issues we have are all in my head LOL.

[d0nnivain]

I tried OLD several years ago because "everybody" said I should. I can't shop on line because it looses something for me so I have no idea why I thought it would work but I tried.

 

I found it painful. When I'd reach out to someone & they didn't respond, that always bothered me, probably more than it should have but it felt like a lot of rejection. I only did it for 3 months. I got past messaging to phone calls with about 7 guys. I met 3 in person. "On paper" they were great; IRL there was no spark.

 

As a woman I always found it easier to meet men IRL. Even if you want the guy to make the 1st move -- which I submit to you is an old fashioned sexist notion -- you still need to make it super clear that you are open to it. I recommend a more forward approach: Smile & Say hi. You rarely have to do much more to get the ball rolling. Most people are shy & are happy when somebody else breaks the ice. If you can manage to start a conversation -- even about the old standby, the weather -- polite people will keep talking to you & really keep talking if they are interested.

 

OLD is a tool. It shouldn't be the only way you approach meeting new people but for some it opens up a whole world that would not otherwise be available.

[mammasita]

I tried OLD several years ago because "everybody" said I should. I can't shop on line because it looses something for me so I have no idea why I thought it would work but I tried.

 

OLD is a tool. It shouldn't be the only way you approach meeting new people but for some it opens up a whole world that would not otherwise be available.

Very interesting point. I LOVE on line shopping and find it painful to go to malls/stores and try things on.

 

This is just an example that one way is not the only way. Find what works for YOU and go with it.

 

So yes on line dating works, but it may not work for everyone.

[Dallers]

I found Tinder very superficial. It is a vanity app not a dating app. 95% of the time nobody talks, they just like to nose at local people they might know but rarely does it lead to anything. One nights stands are what this app is good for.

 

I highly recommend Plenty of Fish. A guy at work who is now married with a baby on the way met his true love in his first week on the app. It is simple and very effective without all the rubbish that most come with. You do not need to pay a penny.

[Targetlock]

Yeah not sure about those really expensive dating sites, its probably going to be the same experience as POF or one of the others.

[d0nnivain]

Yeah not sure about those really expensive dating sites, its probably going to be the same experience as POF or one of the others.

 

 

From a consumer perspective, I actually didn't hate my e-harmony experience which at the time was the most expensive one out there.

 

My friend was a bartender & it creeped me out when people would mention to her that they saw her on match or POF.

 

I also thought that anybody who would pay that much money and spend like 4 hours taking their personality profile test was serious. I could get a casual fling in any corner bar. I wanted a relationship.

 

Again, I didn't find the love of my life OL but the guys I was paired with were "as advertised": quality, intelligent, stable men looking for a LTR / marriage so I can't say that I didn't get what I paid for: introductions to suitable partners.

[Dallers]

 

Again, I didn't find the love of my life OL but the guys I was paired with were "as advertised": quality, intelligent, stable men looking for a LTR / marriage so I can't say that I didn't get what I paid for: introductions to suitable partners.

 

This is one of the biggest problems with dating these days.

 

If you do not meet the criteria then you do not get the women. Love is a word that has no meaning anymore, guys are selling themselves just like they do in a job interview.

[KatZee]

Honestly, in my experience, online dating has been good for when I'm bored and need something to do. I've been at it for a little while and I haven't met anyone of substance, or anyone who's been honest with me.

 

I've had a ton of first and only dates. That's fine. Then I've had:

 

1. The guy who proclaimed to be 6 feet tall and showed up and was my height exactly and didn't look like his pics.

 

2. The guy who turned out to be an alcoholic.

 

3. The guy who turned out to be an extreme pantyhose fetishist.

 

4. The guy who did a complete mind-f.uck manipulation thing to me and led me on only to poof.

 

5. The guy who only wanted to be text buddies.

 

6. The guy who only texted me emoticons.

 

7. The guy who threatened to kill me.

 

So yeah. It's been a mixed bag.

 

 

OF TRASH.

[Targetlock]

Its the losers like that put the rest of us good ones who actually want a real relationship and meet someone look bad it can frustrating sometimes just too get a response.

[Leigh 87]

I've met quality men online.

 

My ex is good looking, tall and makes good money. Plays the drums and loves to travel. Cheated on me but I had fun with him for over 2 years.

 

current bf is tall and good looking. Very decent person. Never been happier.

 

I met a couple of decent guys in between. One was in college and was confident with a goodppersonality.

 

One guy disappeared on me. But I had crazy chemistry with him and felt very lucky at the time I was with him.

[KatZee]

I've met quality men online.

 

My ex is good looking, tall and makes good money. Plays the drums and loves to travel. Cheated on me but I had fun with him for over 2 years.

 

One guy disappeared on me. But I had crazy chemistry with him and felt very lucky at the time I was with him.

 

These are not the qualities of "quality" men. Not even remotely.

[Armegoggon]

I'm only 18, 19 soon but attempting dating sites since last September.

 

I have not gotten a single real life meeting. The closest I ever got was a phone number exchange by a 26 year old woman.

[Leigh 87]

These are not the qualities of "quality" men. Not even remotely.

 

 

 

Haha haha

 

I guess I phrased that wrong:o

 

My ex is good looking and tall AND he is super loyal with the right woman. He has a really good personality. Aside from the cheating part a lot of hot girls in real life consider him a good catch. He does earn a lot.

 

Cheaters can be good people if the cheating was a one time thing. I highly doubt he'd cheat on the new girl.

 

My current bf is as good as they come. He's an absolutely wonderful person. I can't even believe I found someone like him.

 

I suppose my current bf and the other guy who DID NOT cheat or dissappear are the only "quality" men.

[OhThatGirl]

OLD is definitely worthwhile. It doesn't give you a huge number of entirely acceptable candidates. Rather in real life you're likely to have a decent connection with maybe 1 in 30 similarly aged people. Now you have a pool of 1000+ people... Soooo... Yes, there will be a LOT of frogs. Some princes will think you're a frog. Once in a while you'll find a prince and he thinks you're a princess. It's just a numbers game.

 

I've used OLD in the past. Met around 10 people for dates. One progressed to a 2 year relationship (though admittedly it shouldn't have lasted that long, we were not right for each other though we tried.) And now... I'm moving along quite well with a GREAT guy I wouldn't have otherwise met. He lives 10 minutes away. Our paths never crossed before OLD, we had entirely different circles, and yet here we are.

 

OLD is particularly useful if you want to expand your horizons. Guy I'm dating is an executive chef. He got into OLD trying to get away from dating people in the same field as him as he had some bad experiences dating "food service girls" that at our age weren't taking life seriously. I'm in healthcare. It worked. Is he going to be the super intellectual, rich husband that provides a living so I can quit working and do charity events? No. Thank God. That would drive me nuts. But he's smart, he's great at what he does, he's incredibly thoughtful, attentive, romantic, and feels like he won the OLD lottery.

 

Oddly enough, I kinda do too.

 

So yes, OLD is worthwhile.