Ex partner of a sex addicted

[Gillan88]

Hello everyone, I'm here to tell you my story . I've already made ​​my decision , I have drawn my conclusions ... my desire is only a comparison (it's almost impossible to talk about this topic with friends or acquaintances , they'll tell you all : "It is the dream of every man a nymphomaniac girlfriend " or burst out laughing. ) , relief and consolation search .

I think it also has a mild histrionic personality disorder , but I will not hazard a diagnosis risky .

My first girl , the one I lost my virginity , proved to be sexually dependent.

Our whole relationship was characterized by endless red flags from the first day in which he insisted earnestly in sex ( I refused saying that I wanted more and I wanted to deepen the relationship but she , heedless of these words, he is just irritated ) , in ' be straight out of a romance and was immediately thrown on me, in total confidentiality of his past, of all that concern and his actions ( I thought I had a kind of retroactive jealousy , however I did not trust and that's it ) in which he was ashamed to be seen with , concerns and reactions without any sense , mood swings , lack of intimacy , conception of sex as " anti-stress " inability to come in the sex act as a play with the rules and what making , lack of hobbies, interests , personal tastes, what to do during the day, as total solitude without friends and especially friends since moving away because they defined a whore , a total lack of self-esteem, tendency to absorb the personality of the person with which has a report , a total lack of empathy , intimacy , selfishness total sex ... until the end, when his sexual desire has been gradually to fade away for no apparent reason .

It was my first relationship -many do not understand or do not want to understand.

It ' was my first woman in spite of my age (21). I 've also had problems with my self-esteem : I was overweight and , because of my shyness , I have always refused any contact female .

I thought so much about being the wrong one and instead ... I do not know if I 've ever cheated , I have no idea but I'm not surprised .

 

She , instill , had nothing ... It 's very attractive , yes, but he had nothing . It ' was among us a one-sided relationship where I just gave . She could not ( or for want , do you want for your trouble ) to give me nothing. Our relationship progressed only because of me . She was totally passive in everything.

I was probably more taken by the idea of ​​having a girlfriend , from pampering and from what little affection he gave me .

I think I have lived and have received less than half of the attention , the pleasures of intimacy that you feel in a healthy relationship .

Infuse I do not miss her, I miss her attentions , being appreciated and to be wanted .

 

Attention than they have ever received. I loved her, or her role ?

I do not know what was running through your head: it's almost as if on the one hand he knew that I was the one "right" for her, the other wanted to have sex with someone else.

The situation for me was getting pià comunuqe heartbreaking . After five months, I decided to leave it : I was wrong , I know, to insult and hurt her heavily in its weak points.

I have a kind of emotional ping pong : Sometimes I love her , sometimes contempt.

 

From the day that I insulted her totally ignores me and avoids me in all ways. I think shame ( try this ? ) . Sometimes I write to say that I miss you and I'll be there for anything , other times just insults . Should I stop to look totally .

I do not know what makes me suffer or why the try .

Perhaps, lack of self-esteem definitely , I would just after I try to tell me "you're important to me , I miss you " or maybe I resent that a person whom I love you bestow upon everyone and everything without pleasure but only for need. Infuse she has never lived an experience with friends, travel, anything ... just home and have sex with people who respected her and even used it and that's it .

Do not think I want her so well are injured , I just want some sort of sop to my self-esteem , feeling her say that are important to his life.

 

Would not go back for anything in the whole world would just suffering.

I think everything is amplified by the hiatus that exists in life ever since I am not working or studying, and the days I practically empty these days.

Thank you for those who have read to the end: do not judge me as a bad person.

I wish I had some testimony of someone who is no past or even , tips and tricks .

Thanks to all of you , thank you.

[Gillan88]

In fact, I think the problem is mostly my own.

 

Although I have no problem with self-esteem , time, or with peers, or with the elderly, or people with "established " in society ( I do a job of "prestige" ) some things that almost intimidating.

 

For me, inexperienced in terms of sex, a liberated woman causes me quite a few "problems" .

 

I have no prejudices , for charity : she still did horrible things , it is obviously exaggerated.

 

It 's almost as if he were searching for his attention / approval that , if he had these sexual orientation I do not think I've ever tried .

 

It ' a long time since I do not need to have "attention" from someone , because it's a long, long time since I've suffered from a lack of self-esteem.

 

Almost feel the need to be convinced at all costs to be better than her ( he never tried anything , he was just at home or had sex , no real relationship with people. Has never experienced anything , nor an output with friends, or a journey of sex and nothing ... just stay at home alone) and almost the need to " recover " everything that I've given everything I've taught you everything I have done in real time, all the time I spent .

 

I never had any female attention nor female nor close friends have never gotten up close or far away in the world of women , and it is perhaps this that led me to be with her .

 

I have no respect for her , but ... I never thought to be intelligent or self-confident , or temperamentally pleases me so much. There I found no quality unfounded . Nothing at all, total emptiness ...

 

I'm not disregarding what I did : in fact , I find it still very attractive .

 

Why then are searching for his attention? Because I want to help her, when instill little I care? I think it's just looking for his " Thank you, only you understand me , I love you so much sweetness ."

 

Despite this , I feel really happy and I think that each of us is the best psychologist himself

[Gillan88]

I'm so sorry for his poor life...

[Gillan88]

Up please