jgs78 Posted February 8, 2005 Share Posted February 8, 2005 OK, so I've been reading a lot of the posts here about second chances and I was wondering what anyone thought about the possibility of someone having a second chance if they only dated someone for a month? I have a friend who is really upset and she had been dating someone she had met online for a month and a half. He decided to end it and did it via email. She keeps pining away for him and I feel so bad, I don't know what to tell her when she says, "I just want another chance. You think it might be possible don't you?" Now I am not one to be a skeptic but I just don't think that this guy would ever want to try again, I think that when you leave someone in an email NO MATTER how nice it is, not wanting a relationship means not wanting a relationship. I don't like lying to her and telling her that she DEFINITELY has the chance of him wanting to come back to her at another point in his life but I don't know what else to do. His email to her wasn't mean, it actually sounded like he was really confused about things, he has too much going on in his life(I know this from what she has told me about him) and he has committment issues. I know that if it is the right person, committment issues are thrown out the window but THERE ARE circumstances where a person is just not mentally or emotionally ready to have a relationship(I've been there before). ANYWAY, anybody out there think that people who met through online dating have a second chance? Any advice what I can do to help cheer her up? Link to post Share on other sites
Tiger-Lily Posted February 8, 2005 Share Posted February 8, 2005 Since he was clear in his e.mail to her. He knows what he wants. It is not becoming of a lady to look desperate!!! I am sure she liked him alot but you can not make anyone like you. She should give him time to miss her. He can contact her if he wants too. So tell her to let sleeping dogs lie. She needs to: 1. Go to as many social events and interesting public activities as possible. 2. Be involved in interesting extracurricular activities. 3. Don't lose her cool about him. Get over it. Link to post Share on other sites
Author jgs78 Posted February 9, 2005 Author Share Posted February 9, 2005 Thanks Tigerlily, I really appreciate your help. Except how do you convince someone that is THAT upset about something to leave the house? She is really upset, I have been going over to her place but cannot convince her to go out. She is really clinging on to the hope that he will change his mind. I think what makes her cling on to the thought is the fact that he said that he thought he was ready but realized that he wasn't as in good of a place as he thought he was. On the same note I told her that it wasn't good that he told her that he wasn't as excited about the situation as he should have been and it wasn't fair to her. He said this before the "I thought I was ready for a relationship" part. I told her also that because he ended the relationship the way he did that it seemed pretty final. Another friend of ours said that she is just going through her period of mourning and that she will get over it. BUT I have never seen her like this, I almost feel as if maybe she needs to talk to a professional. Has anyone else had a problem like this before? Link to post Share on other sites
Tiger-Lily Posted February 9, 2005 Share Posted February 9, 2005 You are indeed a very good friend. I support the idea of professional help. She may need it. It would be a good idea also if you can go along with her. Hopefully she goes... Link to post Share on other sites
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