enchanted771 Posted May 12, 2014 Share Posted May 12, 2014 Posted in wrong forum so sorry if you saw this post already. Long story short...was dating this guy, and Way he was acting/talking thought it was progressing. We Became emotionally close one weekend then he backs off. Was a yoyo after that. Had one bad blowout where he had a temper Tantrum on a date over something I said. We made plans a few weeks later, but he was always " too busy" or working, traveling etc and would run at the thought I was talking about a relationship. Which I never even said. He never introduced me to close friends, any family, etc so I assumed he Just wasn't serious about me and just passing time. He has a bad Dating track record where they had an issue with the lack of attention, him traveling so much, and hardly ever calling them. So I think he's a commitment phobe. I broke things off but then he wants to be platonic friends Even saying that maybe we will be better as friends. Can hang out, go to the beach, etc. What is the point???? We had feelings for each other, went out, spent time together, was intimate, slept at eachothers house, etc. It's not like were going to talk shop. Oh so how is the dating scene? Come on! Lol. We were friends for a few months before we dated, but it all built up to that. Thoughts? Link to post Share on other sites
Michelle ma Belle Posted May 12, 2014 Share Posted May 12, 2014 I'm of the mind that if you want it, you can achieve it. Why not? You said yourself that you started out as friends so why not go back to that IF that's something you want as well. It's NOT impossible you know. Sometimes relationships don't work out romantically for one reason or another. If you like each other and enjoy each other's company then why does the idea of going back to just being friends seem so unreasonable? IF, on the other hand, you still have romantic feelings for him and are secretly hoping you'll get back together again then I can understand wanting some distance from this other option. Self preservation. This return to friendship only works if you're in a space where you've made peace with with the fact that you don't work as a couple and are ready to move forward. Good luck. Link to post Share on other sites
Author enchanted771 Posted May 12, 2014 Author Share Posted May 12, 2014 Thanks. I just wondered if he was being sincere about It or trying to make it easier on him. But I was really the one made the decision to stop seeing him. He doesn't want to make the effort For a relationship. Whether with me or with anyone. But sounds Like he just likes to casually date women although his dating profile says otherwise. Anyways, I think I need some time to make peace with this, and accept The fact that we will never be together as a couple. I'm just Not the type of person who likes to casually date. I don't settle on first guy, but if we have a connection , things in common, spending time together regularly, then I think that it's progressing. Anyways, what you said makes sense. Link to post Share on other sites
TheKook Posted May 14, 2014 Share Posted May 14, 2014 Yeah, it's actually very possible. I'm friends with a few my exes and we still laugh and get along great... Funny thing is, after dating them and having the relief of the relationship being over, and moving past it - the friendship is actually better. Just make sure that neither of you have any feelings left for each other, otherwise it won't do either of you any good. Link to post Share on other sites
Tayla Posted May 15, 2014 Share Posted May 15, 2014 Yeah, it's actually very possible. I'm friends with a few my exes and we still laugh and get along great... Funny thing is, after dating them and having the relief of the relationship being over, and moving past it - the friendship is actually better. Just make sure that neither of you have any feelings left for each other, otherwise it won't do either of you any good. Agree to a point. My former ex's and I have a lovely respectable feeling of admiration and endearment. we also support each other thru careers, relations and community events. Seems like a breath of fresh air to know them both good and bad , yet still go, yup I call them Friend Three of them are re-married and I get along with the wives, its funny actually cuz they ask my advice, I am as clueless as them on why their hubbies act a certain way or such, so there is that... Link to post Share on other sites
Baller25 Posted May 16, 2014 Share Posted May 16, 2014 No, at least not on your end because your the dumped not the dumper. The fact that your talking about him on LS means that on some level, even subconsciously, you want him — is that platonic? I've been friends with an ex for the last 4 years. We boned a couple of times in that time though, but that's still 'platonic' right? Link to post Share on other sites
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