Need some advice.

[Teraskas]

Hello everyone, me again.

 

Now, this is going to be a long and vague story, so I'll try to keep it both short and sweet.

 

Long story short:

My dad is really into biking to the point where he's a semi-pro.

(I however am not, hence why I wasn't present at this store.)

He buys his clothing from a specific shop which is quite a way's out from where we live.

Last time however, they didn't have the stuff he needed in store, and while waiting, he got talking to the girl who was assisting him.

Turns out she is currently in her final Master's year in communication skills.

And he mentioned that I went there as well, except choosing for the translation / interpreter route with regards to Dutch, English, Russian, Italian, and German. He's seen her several times, mentioned me on practically every encounter and she seemed generally impressed.

Given the similarities between us with regards to our taste in women, I'm more than willing to give it a shot.

 

Now my ultimate question is: How do I determine that she has a boyfriend and subsequently ask her out other than only knowing her first name and the college she attends ?

I was thinking of saying something along the lines of "You've certainly got a wide range of equipment in this store. I was wondering if you go biking with your boyfriend in your spare time ?"

And perhaps after that IF she's interested, give her my card containing my name / number.

The store isn't exactly near my place, so I'd have to take a considerable detour to get there.

 

I mean, I've approached women before, but this was in an environment where I more or less knew a little bit more about them before making a move.

 

Any advice to handle this ?

[Potz4prez]

Small talk... blah, blah, blah... ask her out. If she says "Sorry, I have a boyfriend", there's your answer.

[pteromom]

I would go in there. Observe her for a few minutes and see if you feel attracted to her.

 

Then - be honest!

 

"Hi, my name is ____. My dad is ______. He keeps talking about you and mentioned you go to my school."

 

Take it from there... if there's a spark, ask her out.

 

Or if that is too much,

 

"Hey, my name is ______. My dad comes in here all the time - _______. I am researching possible gift options for some kind of accessory for his bike... any ideas? (blah blah)... Oh he mentioned that the girl in his bike shop goes to my school - is that you? What are you studying? ...(blah, blah)"

[Keenly]

So she works at a bike shop?

 

Tell her you have a bike that you'd like her to test ride. With an exagerrated wink and comical elbow nudge.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Don't actually do that.

[pteromom]

So she works at a bike shop?

 

Tell her you have a bike that you'd like her to test ride. With an exagerrated wink and comical elbow nudge.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Don't actually do that.

 

You scared me there, Keenly. LOL LOL

[Teraskas]

Alas, as I feared...she did have a boyfriend. :/

However, it was good practice to start a conversation and keep it going, so it wasn't a total loss.

[Keenly]

Alas, as I feared...she did have a boyfriend. :/

However, it was good practice to start a conversation and keep it going, so it wasn't a total loss.

 

Well done sir. Proud of you.

[Potz4prez]

Alas, as I feared...she did have a boyfriend. :/

However, it was good practice to start a conversation and keep it going, so it wasn't a total loss.

 

That's the right attitude to have. If a girl turns you down, for whatever reason, don't think it was something wrong with you, it was something to do with her that made you not compatible. Kindly thank her for her time and wish her the best, and start talking to the next girl that strikes your fancy.

 

If it's in public like at a bar, 1) The original girl may start have second thoughts because she saw how nice and confident you were about it, and how good of a chat you're having with the next girl and 2) the next girl may have seen how well you handled yourself and instantly think better of you.

 

Just be nice to everyone and never hurt someone on purpose... that's some life moto ****.

[preraph]

Go to the store. If she's not there, leave. If she's there, tell her you want to buy a present for your dad, who's really into biking and who has mentioned a nice girl usually helps him when he comes here. Ask her what she recommends as a gift for your dad. While doing that, bring up "My dad tells me you have a Master's" whatever -- so do I. Just take her temperature while you're there and see if she acts embarrassed or if she acts really smiley and interested back. If she acts like she's pulling back or it's real awkward, don't ask her out. If she acts interested and locked in some way, then say, "Hey, if you're not attached, I'd love to just sit and talk sometime over coffee." She can come back with "okay" or "I'm seeing someone, but we could have coffee" or "I'm seeing someone, period." Take it from there. Good luck!

[Teraskas]

That's the right attitude to have. If a girl turns you down, for whatever reason, don't think it was something wrong with you, it was something to do with her that made you not compatible. Kindly thank her for her time and wish her the best, and start talking to the next girl that strikes your fancy.

 

If it's in public like at a bar, 1) The original girl may start have second thoughts because she saw how nice and confident you were about it, and how good of a chat you're having with the next girl and 2) the next girl may have seen how well you handled yourself and instantly think better of you.

 

Just be nice to everyone and never hurt someone on purpose... that's some life moto ****.

 

Much appreciated.

In the beginning when I started dating around 2 years ago, I always thought that ultimately I was to blame for being rejected.

For being turned down at every corner, there just HAD to be something wrong with me.

 

Ironically, I have been following that last line of advice from birth. xD

Other people ? Eh, not so much.