SpiralOut Posted May 17, 2014 Share Posted May 17, 2014 I don't tell many people this but I've been slowly working on putting together a writing portfolio. My efforts are sporatic at best, as my confidence levels are low to the point that I'm slightly afraid of what I'm doing. I keep starting things and stopping partway. I switched one of my blogs over to a self-hosted site so I can put up ads and attempt to earn revenue. It looks great. It's all about food, gardening, nutrition, practical advice and recipes and how-to guides. It has potential. My stats last year were really good despite my never updating it so I think I can do something with it. However, since realizing I have something good going, I have become that much more afraid to pursue it. I haven't worked on it all month even though nothing is really stopping me. All I have managed to do is some research, and I have written a rough draft. Actually writing it up for publication scares me for some reason. The fear has kicked in again. Then I joined the OpenOffice site with the intent of volunteering as a technical writer, since they need help with things. I subscribed to the email list but haven't gone any further with the whole DOING something part of it, even though it would be some good experience and provide me with pieces for my portfolio. I joined a writing meetup group, which has great workshops that I am NEVER able to attend due to my work schedule, so that's frustrating. I think being around other writers might help with my confidence and motivation but I can't even do it. I post anonymously on an online writing site, which I feel a bit more comfortable doing, maybe because I don't see it as impacting my life. It is a place to practice and get feedback. I used to write articles for websites like helium.com, until I realized my style of writing isn't really appreciated there. Those sites are basically content farms. I'm sort of glad that I backed away from it, because I read somewhere that google dislikes those sites. Google has tried to crack down on them or I guess limit how often they pop up in search results. My goal for this weekend is to go into my account and save my articles on my computer while deleting what was published. I want to fix them up and reuse them elsewhere. I see this as a way out of my current working situation. I hate my job. I've always dreamed of writing for a living. I've been told by so many people that I have talent. I even had a meeting at the local college to discuss their technical writing course. I haven't followed through with anything since then. WTF is wrong with me? It feels like something is holding me back, which I keep struggling and pushing against until I get tired and give up. But I keep coming back to this, over and over, no matter how many times I have "given up," so it must be my true calling. I've got a general idea of what I need to do: improve my confidence, make myself work on things when I don't want to (I stopped at a coffee shop this week after work so I could write a draft), write reminders in my calender, etc. I guess I'm just posting here because maybe confessing some of this will help? I keep it a secret from most people. I made the mistake of mentioning some of it to my father, which he responded to with silence. He probably thinks I'm being stupid. I have a fear people will think my goals are stupid unless I've already accomplished them. It seems like a lot of people (in my life, anyway) are discouraging when it comes to this. Link to post Share on other sites
Potz4prez Posted May 17, 2014 Share Posted May 17, 2014 You're nervous about making a big change... I usually take that as a sign of good things to come Personally I'm the same way... I'm in grad school, during one of the most important months of my grad career, with buttloads of work to do... and I'm posting here. It's like avoiding all the work will make it go away. It won't. You and I just need to sit down and ****ing do it. Maybe try to surround yourself with other aspiring writers IRL? Success is contagious. I didn't care about chemistry till I was suddenly surrounded by other chemists. Now it's exciting! Oh and take those risks! Break the status quo! That's how you become successful. Best of luck Link to post Share on other sites
learning_slowly Posted May 17, 2014 Share Posted May 17, 2014 I have stacks to do and procrastinate. Eventually you'll get enough desire and realise its worth the effort or you'll slump back into a dead end life. Watch Trainspotting Good luck Link to post Share on other sites
Targetlock Posted May 17, 2014 Share Posted May 17, 2014 well with these sort of things you don't know until you give it a go it is better to try and fail than not try and live with regret. Link to post Share on other sites
newmoon Posted May 18, 2014 Share Posted May 18, 2014 I see this as a way out of my current working situation. I hate my job. I've always dreamed of writing for a living. I've been told by so many people that I have talent. I even had a meeting at the local college to discuss their technical writing course. I haven't followed through with anything since then. hate to be a naysayer, but even writers with tons of books under their belt still hold down a day job because... well, only a very tiny percentage of people can actually make money writing f/t. most do have supplemental income. pursuing a writing course (such as technical writing) would be a great start, because you could actually turn that into some type of day job. you should, imho, just change your day job to something you like more, because it'll get you out of the 'I hate my job' mentality and may wake up creativity and spur you to do more with your writing and not feel like you're not doing anything. you might also take the time to distinguish if writing is a passion for you versus something you can actually make a living at. and remember that writers write, daily, so you can't really call yourself a writer if you're not actively writing. Link to post Share on other sites
FitChick Posted May 18, 2014 Share Posted May 18, 2014 (edited) hate to be a naysayer, but even writers with tons of books under their belt still hold down a day job because... well, only a very tiny percentage of people can actually make money writing f/t. most do have supplemental income. pursuing a writing course (such as technical writing) would be a great start, because you could actually turn that into some type of day job. you should, imho, just change your day job to something you like more, because it'll get you out of the 'I hate my job' mentality and may wake up creativity and spur you to do more with your writing and not feel like you're not doing anything. you might also take the time to distinguish if writing is a passion for you versus something you can actually make a living at. and remember that writers write, daily, so you can't really call yourself a writer if you're not actively writing. Totally agree with this. Writers are always writing whether they are paid or not. I have three friends who are professional writers and struggling. Both now work in PR as their day job. One has had two novels published with good reviews and had previously worked as a journalist for several big name newspapers here and in the UK as his day jobs. The other has published business books as well as a popular book on humor. Another friend wrote for TV and sold several scripts and was a staff writer for a short period of time. The work dried up and she wrote several children's books which sold. She still writes screenplays as a hobby but makes jewelry now. She is married so doesn't have to support herself. You can use writing as a hobby and a diversion from your dreary life. Or write about your dreary life and job -- look at a show like The Office! Edited May 18, 2014 by FitChick 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author SpiralOut Posted May 18, 2014 Author Share Posted May 18, 2014 pursuing a writing course (such as technical writing) would be a great start, because you could actually turn that into some type of day job. Exactly. Technical writers make more money than fiction writers and there is a greater demand for them, that's why I'm pursuing it. I think it would make a fine day job. Link to post Share on other sites
Author SpiralOut Posted May 18, 2014 Author Share Posted May 18, 2014 (edited) You can use writing as a hobby and a diversion from your dreary life. Or write about your dreary life and job -- look at a show like The Office! Sure I could but that's not what I want. Why divert myself from my dreary life when I could take a chance and try to change it? The odds might not be in my favour but I think it's worth trying for. Edited May 18, 2014 by SpiralOut Link to post Share on other sites
Ruby Slippers Posted May 19, 2014 Share Posted May 19, 2014 I agree that getting training and experience in a lucrative niche writing area, such as technical writing, is a good strategy. Demand for good technical writers is increasing all the time, and a decent to good one can make great money with a company or solo. You can always do the work that you really love on the side - and having a steady day job will give you the freedom to be choosy about those more creative projects, and demand good fees for them. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
FitChick Posted May 19, 2014 Share Posted May 19, 2014 The reason you're stalling is because if you fail, your dream will be gone. Link to post Share on other sites
Author SpiralOut Posted May 19, 2014 Author Share Posted May 19, 2014 The reason you're stalling is because if you fail, your dream will be gone. That sounds about right. I don't know what I would do if it doesn't work out. Link to post Share on other sites
Ruby Slippers Posted May 19, 2014 Share Posted May 19, 2014 That sounds about right. I don't know what I would do if it doesn't work out. I've been working toward my dream life... my whole life. And more and more, I achieve flashes or even long stretches of that dream manifested into reality. Very exciting! It will work out, as long as you don't give up. I've been self-employed for most of my life, and have turned down lucrative corporate job offers because they were meaningless to me. Creative and spiritual fulfillment has always meant so much more to me than material comfort. It takes a lot of tenacity to run your own ship and do something more than just survive in this world. You have to constantly push yourself to keep reaching for your true potential. When you stop pushing, you stop growing. Read books and watch talks by people who have blazed their own trail. Learn from their mistakes. 95% of it is simply doing the work. And it's rarely some big overwhelming task - it comes down to lots of small, easy to medium-difficulty tasks - you just have to DO them, and keep doing them. Be frugal and smart with your money. Create a budget and track your income and expenses. Evaluate whether your spending lines up with your true values and priorities. Guide yourself gradually into the mindset of the person you aspire to be. Link to post Share on other sites
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