"My way or the high way"

[EverLastluv]

Follow up on my fiance home back with his mommy. There was so much drama going on since I stop taking his phone call. I finally decide to take his call yesterday and agree to see hime to have a discusion.

 

I told him I try my BEST to make it work with us but there was too much of drama with his mom NOT alowing him to have a life of his own. He finally said his mom said he can go back to my house "that means he had to choose between me and her" ( the mom would not marry him) I told him NO WAY! I would never make a man chose between his mom and me. Without his mom/father hands in his marriage there would never be us living together.

 

My fiance has lots of issue with him self besides from his mom. I simply told him he needs to work on HIM. He clames he loves me sooo much and miss me, I feel he do and the truth is I love him with all my heart BUT he has to learn to adjust himself its not always on his terms. I explain to him in details about all that was the problem between our relationship. I hope he would understand and adjust him self. I am not in a rush for another relationship, in my heart if he ever changes his ways and his mom ready to marry him to ME ... I would gladly gave him another chance.

Edited May 21, 2014 by EverLastluv

[EverLastluv]

Question: Do you think a person can change if they truly love their woman? Can a mother stop taking money from ther son? any one ever been in such situtation?

Edited May 21, 2014 by EverLastluv

[Taramere]

I think they can really, really want to change if they love you...but I'm also reminded of the old "scorpion hitching a lift across the river on a frog's back" fable. Just in case you haven't heard of it...

 

The Scorpion and the Frog

 

Just because they want to change in order to make a relationship work with you, it doesn't mean they'll succeed. Which is the pessimistic way of looking at it - but on the positive side, it also means that you shouldn't take their failure to change too personally.

 

It sounds as though your guy's relationship with his mother is always going to be problematic to your relationship - and, most likely, any relationship he has with any other woman. It's something he would have to work on to have a chance of a lasting relationship with you or anybody else. If at present he's taking the "I won't compromise" attitude and doesn't even want to try to minimise the ill effects (on your relationship) of a situation that he and a family member bear responsibility for, then he doesn't sound like promising relationship material at all.

[EverLastluv]

I think they can really, really want to change if they love you...but I'm also reminded of the old "scorpion hitching a lift across the river on a frog's back" fable. Just in case you haven't heard of it...

 

The Scorpion and the Frog

 

Just because they want to change in order to make a relationship work with you, it doesn't mean they'll succeed. Which is the pessimistic way of looking at it - but on the positive side, it also means that you shouldn't take their failure to change too personally.

 

It sounds as though your guy's relationship with his mother is always going to be problematic to your relationship - and, most likely, any relationship he has with any other woman. It's something he would have to work on to have a chance of a lasting relationship with you or anybody else. If at present he's taking the "I won't compromise" attitude and doesn't even want to try to minimise the ill effects (on your relationship) of a situation that he and a family member bear responsibility for, then he doesn't sound like promising relationship material at all.

 

This is very true what you're saying. I already bring it to his attention the reason why we are seperated today. In due time he would realize ... thants when he would accept " it is what it is".

 

Thnaks