Haydn Posted May 22, 2014 Share Posted May 22, 2014 Jeans - Women | ZARA United Kingdom They are in the US as well. Link to post Share on other sites
Bittersweetie Posted May 22, 2014 Share Posted May 22, 2014 Mapper, reading this and your other threads...it seems the issues between you and your H are a lot bigger than the clothes you both wear. He makes you feel like crap. You say he looks ridiculous. The after work stuff. Memorial Day weekend. The month of August with the stepdaughter. Have you ever heard of Dr. Gottman's marriage killers, the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse? Just from your brief posts on this site, sounds like they're all in the mix within your marriage. Maybe you should read up on them. Relationship and Marriage Advice | The Gottman Relationship Blog: The Four Horsemen: Recognizing Criticism, Contempt, Defensiveness, and Stonewalling 3 Link to post Share on other sites
Eggplant Posted May 23, 2014 Share Posted May 23, 2014 I'm not plus sized though. I am actually at the weight I should be now. I was way below my right weight until I hit my late 30s. Then you have no excuse. Buy some stretchy jeans with spandex -- those are so comfortable. Forty-two isn't 22, but it's not 62 either. You're still sexy. You don't get to quit yet. Make the most out of life. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Daisy2013 Posted May 23, 2014 Share Posted May 23, 2014 This is a great thread and the jean article was hilarious! Indeed, a good pair of jeans makes a difference. I'm 45 and wore "mom jeans" not knowing. I had a pair that made me look larger than I was and gave me a saggy butt and just kind of hung there. But I didn't think it mattered at my age what I looked like in jeans. One day, I stopped by a new thrift store just to browse as I'd never been in one and was looking at jeans. I found a pair of Ann Taylor Loft skinny jeans and tried them on. They looked great and I looked sizes smaller! I ran with them and received many compliments. Even my teen daughters said they looked good and they were glad I'd gotten new jeans. So, take some time and find the right style for you. After reading the article, I'm off to find another pair and consider it a worthwhile investment. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
PachucaSunrise Posted May 23, 2014 Share Posted May 23, 2014 ...or just wear what you like and don't worry about what he thinks. Obviously HE has no concerns about impressing you with his jeans. Maybe it's time to adopt some of his "attitude" so you too can wear what you want. Now if YOU would rather wear different jeans, we can talk about brands. But if you are happy in your "farmer jeans", then rock on! THIS! This right here!! Okay I am 42, not 22, so I like comfort over style. At 22 I could have pulled off tight things as I was quite skinny, however I am now about 35 pounds heavier than I was then. My jeans are Levi's which apparently, according to him, are "farmer jeans". You know, no fancy design on the pockets and not so tight I can't sit down in them. He told me this same thing about 3 years ago and I threw out 3 perfectly barely worn jeans because they were "farmer jeans". Oh yeah and he looks so good in his torn oil stained jeans and 1 of his 20 different black t-shirts! He just makes me feel like crap telling me that I always need something nicer. Even when I do get something nice there's always something nicer I should get. I mean he wore plaid shorts with a plaid shirt one day and I didn't say a word even though he looked ridiculous! Even when I tell him that he does need to change he says "Oh I've got the attitude to pull this off". UGH! How irritating that he treats you in such a disrespectful manner! I hope that this is something you don't allow on a regular basis, but I'm afraid you may, which is definitely concerning. There are a million and one other ways to suggest that someone 'up' their game style-wise. The way he's approaching the matter is in no way ANY HELP to your overall well-being or self-esteem. In fact, it sounds as though he may even find some sort of enjoyment in rudely letting you know that he's unsatisfied with your appearance, regardless of how hard you try. And that's not your problem - it's his. He is obviously lacking something from within, and so he projects his insecurities onto you in order to feel better about himself. I hope you already know just how unhealthy that is. If you feel as though you need a change, then go for it, but do it for YOU! As others have already mentioned, there are TONS of jean brands that are specifically tailored to fit each and every body type... AND keep you 'in the know' when it comes to style. You can rock whatever you'd like as long as you feel comfortable wearing it. Heck, wear a tutu if it makes you happy! Whatever changes you ultimately decide to make, just make sure that you're making them for YOU and not to please someone else. Best of luck to you! Link to post Share on other sites
pink_sugar Posted May 23, 2014 Share Posted May 23, 2014 Also op like another poster said above me there are some cute plus size clothing options available now a days. You might want to check them out for yourself more so them him! Try lane and Bryant or fashion bug there is also Cathrine's but there stuff tends to again be some times on the matronly side. Jeans are easy to find in the younger styles I use to even like old navy when I was on the smaller side of plus size. So take a friend and make a day of it and treat yourself just cause you gained a little weight doesn't mean you cant still look fab and be comfortable good luck.. I agree. I'm 25 an opting for women's size jeans instead of juniors sizing due to my wide hips. I have the worst time with jeans. I am not overweight. I am about 130 and 5'3", but I have always had wide hips and I find women's sizing to be more accommodating than juniors. I've actually gotten some pretty hip old navy shorts. As for the jeans, I'd recommend a.n.a modern fit for women, they are a bit more stylish than Levi's. However, I think Levi's has a similar modern fit style for women as well. Just google Levi's modern fit jeans. I agree with another poster about American Eagle jeans as well. One of my favorite brands. While you do want to still appeal and look good for your husband, he should still accept you for you. If finances allow, why not suggest you both go shopping and pick out a few nice outfits you'd like to see on one another? Link to post Share on other sites
CaliGypsy Posted May 24, 2014 Share Posted May 24, 2014 My bf ( who is 55 FYI) hated my boot cut lucky jeans. ( loose and comfortable) He bought me some skinny jeans from old navy. ( the above mentioned flirt cut) They are figure flattering. He loves me in clothes that fit better and even though the other jeans are more comfortable ( however,so are sweatpants and pajamas) I will admit I enjoy that he thinks I look hot in the form fitting jeans. . He also enjoys and appreciates jewelry and accessories. I wear my new jeans to work every day and they are definitely comfortable enough for that. I can bend and stoop and stretch with no problems . ( I'm not sedentary at work for sure) Someone mentioned him taking you shopping for some pants that he thinks will look good on you and that will enhance your assets not just cover them up. He does need to be willing to reciprocate and wear things you like and perhaps ditch the dual plaids. (Lol on that one) Life is filled with compromise when we are with a partner. Are they compromises that you can live with and feel comfortable about? Link to post Share on other sites
SJS Posted May 29, 2014 Share Posted May 29, 2014 I don't know why he's considered such a bad guy for saying he doesn't like how she looks in jeans that he doesn't consider flattering. From how the OP explained it, it doesn't sound so bad...to me anyway. If you like Levi's, go for Silvers that have lots of embellishment on the back. Sounds like that's the look he's going for. Wear them around him, then wear your other jeans when he's not around. Link to post Share on other sites
crederer Posted May 31, 2014 Share Posted May 31, 2014 jeeze this is the third thread in a row I read by you. It sounds you really resent your husband. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Mapper71 Posted June 11, 2014 Author Share Posted June 11, 2014 He tells me I need hipper jeans yet I walk into the optomotrist yesterday for an appt (we had our appts at the same time and I met him there) and I walk in and he's standing at the desk with his back to me filing out a form and I think to myself "Is he really wearing that?" He has got on a pair of his red white and blue plaid shorts which have visible stains on them and there is a tear in the front part on the leg, a white Ralph Lauren short sleeved polo shirt which he continually tells me is so awesome and he paid like $100 for it....back in the early 90s and it LOOKS like it's from the early 90s plus it has yellow sweat stains inside the collar that never come out, hiking boots and white mid calf socks pulled all the way up. He looked absolutely ridiculous but as he has told me he knows he looks good! Yeah maybe for 1995! Link to post Share on other sites
stillafool Posted June 11, 2014 Share Posted June 11, 2014 Mapper why don't you both go shopping. It will be fun. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
SJS Posted June 11, 2014 Share Posted June 11, 2014 He tells me I need hipper jeans yet I walk into the optomotrist yesterday for an appt (we had our appts at the same time and I met him there) and I walk in and he's standing at the desk with his back to me filing out a form and I think to myself "Is he really wearing that?" He has got on a pair of his red white and blue plaid shorts which have visible stains on them and there is a tear in the front part on the leg, a white Ralph Lauren short sleeved polo shirt which he continually tells me is so awesome and he paid like $100 for it....back in the early 90s and it LOOKS like it's from the early 90s plus it has yellow sweat stains inside the collar that never come out, hiking boots and white mid calf socks pulled all the way up. He looked absolutely ridiculous but as he has told me he knows he looks good! Yeah maybe for 1995! Maybe you should learn how to get stains out better... Link to post Share on other sites
Author Mapper71 Posted June 11, 2014 Author Share Posted June 11, 2014 Maybe you should learn how to get stains out better... Ooh slam! Kind of hard to get out oil stains! 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Poppygoodwill Posted June 13, 2014 Share Posted June 13, 2014 If I were you I would say: "I'll happily go and buy new jeans if you come along and buy new XXXXX (fill in the blank with his most hideous clothes) because I'm sorry to tell you this, but honestly honey, they don't flatter you at all." 1 Link to post Share on other sites
nofeelings22 Posted June 13, 2014 Share Posted June 13, 2014 This doesn't sound like a problem. This sounds like fun! Look at the bright side. A lot of husbands, after years of marriage don't care what their wives wear because they don't see them as sex objects in any way. You have a healthy situation here where your husband still thinks you are hot and wants to see you looking hot in a good pair of jeans. Why? Because he will think about you in those jeans throughout the day when you aren't even around. Fantasize. Take more interest in general. He'll listen to what you say more. You really can't go wrong here.You'll feel a little better about yourself too. Link to post Share on other sites
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