My ex might be cheating - but I found out in a wrong way - what do I do?

[gordon12]

Hi.

 

This is my first post here. I didn't know where else to go w/ this question.

 

Regrettably, or maybe not so much, I've read my girlfriend's e-mail - an account that she doesn't really use - and I found some emails from another WOMAN of a sexual nature.

 

So...my question is...do I admit I broke her trust by looking at her e-mail and confront her, or do I have to sit on this and pretend I don't know anything about it?

 

Thanks for any advice you can offer.

 

Mike

[KANSAN]

If it's your ex whats the problem? you're not togather.

[Barby]

Okay I think it's kinda hard to say...if they were just "talk" and these two had never met or been physical, maybe she was just "bi-curious" and fullfilling a desire through emails and cyber-space? Not saying that it's right but maybe it was harmless?! And if this is the case I say keep it to yourself and refrain from looking further or you may continue to find things you don't like and end up losing your relationship (but if she's doing things to hurt you, maybe that would be the best thing for ya)?!?!

 

 

Now if she has "been with" this woman, well then I say yes fess up and comfront her.....go ahead and tell her what you did and WHY you did it, then get her explanation! If she has been intimate with another then why are you worried about losing her trust (she violated your's IF she cheated). Best thing to do is come clean in this scenario (IMHO).

[gordon12]

Originally posted by KANSAN

If it's your ex whats the problem? you're not togather.

 

OOPS!!! Not my Ex...not sure why I wrote that...freudian slip maybe? :-)

[gordon12]

Originally posted by Barby

Okay I think it's kinda hard to say...if they were just "talk" and these two had never met or been physical, maybe she was just "bi-curious" and fullfilling a desire through emails and cyber-space? Not saying that it's right but maybe it was harmless?! And if this is the case I say keep it to yourself and refrain from looking further or you may continue to find things you don't like and end up losing your relationship (but if she's doing things to hurt you, maybe that would be the best thing for ya)?!?!

 

 

Now if she has "been with" this woman, well then I say yes fess up and comfront her.....go ahead and tell her what you did and WHY you did it, then get her explanation! If she has been intimate with another then why are you worried about losing her trust (she violated your's IF she cheated). Best thing to do is come clean in this scenario (IMHO).

 

 

 

DIDN'T realize it was an ex...in that case...yes why are you in her account and what business is it of your's unless she is telling you that you two are getting back together and it's only you and her?!?!?!

 

 

 

 

Thanks for the advice. No, I don't think they've been physical - but I know that she's been with women in the past so it's not just something for her to be "curious" about. She's an out and out bisexual.

 

Maybe the best thing is to just forget about it.

 

Sorry about the "ex" in the title mix-up. She's my current girlfriend of a year who I live with.

[Barby]

Oh well then...I dunno if you can let it go, then do so...if not and you think it might eat away at you...then maybe telling her what you know would be the best thing so you can resolve things one way or another?!

[Bryanp]

I think the question is how do you feel about the possibility of cheating?

You and your girlfriend are living together and are in a committed relationship.

How would she feel if you were talking sexually with another person? I think you need a discussion with her unless you don't mind her being emotionally or physically involved with another person while she is living with you. You need to deal with this now.

[Hund1976]

Are the emails recent? Or are they older? If they are old I wouldn't worry about it as much. If she is still talking like this then you have a problem.