What new tactics is she trying? Breadcrumbs?

[KaliLove]

There's a simple reason why men don't understand chemistry the way women do.

 

Men feel chemistry for almost all attractive women.

 

Women obviously are not the same.

 

Of course that often leads to a situation where a guy feels chemistry with a woman, but she doesn't feel it on her end. This is confusing to men. When there are so many women who claim to not feel chemistry with him, he just starts to believe it doesn't exist.

 

Men don't understand a lot of things the way women do.

 

Attraction and chemistry are not the same thing. Just because a girl gives you a boner doesn't mean you have chemistry with her. Chemistry involves the brain, not just the naughty bits.

[somedude81]

Men don't understand a lot of things the way women do.

 

Attraction and chemistry are not the same thing. Just because a girl gives you a boner doesn't mean you have chemistry with her. Chemistry involves the brain, not just the naughty bits.

 

For a man, the brain is in the naughty bits.

 

LOL, OK they aren't, but there might as well be a direct line.

 

To me, chemistry is the same thing as attraction. Lumo seems to be the same way.

[KaliLove]

So you want to be in a serious relationship with every woman you're physically attracted to? That's nutso crazy talk!

[somedude81]

So you want to be in a serious relationship with every woman you're physically attracted to? That's nutso crazy talk!

 

Until a woman has shown that she is not relationship material, yes.

 

Why do you think men approach so many women?

 

BTW, it's probably a stretch saying "serious relationship."

 

Men get rejected by lots of women in their lives. The primary reason men even want to ask those women out, is because they are attractive. There is only one reason why a guy would approach a woman he doesn't know.

[Medium.Lumo]

Yes I'm kind of obsessed. She was my first relationship and I'm missing her badly.

 

But unfortunately she IS crazy. And she treated me badly. I don't think i need to do any soul searching.

 

You guys laugh, but you're obsessed Medium.Lumo All my exes have been obsessed with me too. If we're so crazy and awful why do you guys keep coming back... over and over and over Looks like I'm not the only one that needs to do some soul-searching.

[Medium.Lumo]

I've been so down today... I think she is finally starting to go NC, no messages or anything. I thought it was what I wanted but I am starting to panic and feel horrible. What if I never actually find another girl??? Should I try to salvage this?

[KaliLove]

CHILL! EVERYBODY thinks they'll never meet anyone else after a break up. Of course you will. Relax!

 

There's nothing to salvage. She's a crazy person and a gold digger. Get through these next couple of days and the panic will start to subside.

 

Keep reminding yourself of all the awful things she did.

[Medium.Lumo]

I am feeling a huge urge to send her a message... I don't know what she's feeling right now but I am feeling regret. I know she did bad things but now that she isn't responding my sense that I made a mistake is stronger than ever. I just want to gauge her feelings.

 

CHILL! EVERYBODY thinks they'll never meet anyone else after a break up. Of course you will. Relax!

 

There's nothing to salvage. She's a crazy person and a gold digger. Get through these next couple of days and the panic will start to subside.

 

Keep reminding yourself of all the awful things she did.

[Greeneyegemini]

So, I'm a noob at this stuff. BUT, when I have an urge to send my ex a message, people on here always tell me NO!!! DON"T DO ITTT!!!!! Firstly, you already contacted her and she didn't reply. Each message you send is just going to push her further and further away. And make you feel worse when she doesn't reply/ send you what you want to hear. You got to keep NC. Trust me, it gets easier each day. Which I know makes you want to punch me in the face for telling you....but it's true. Don't hope for her to come back. Accept it's over. Work on yourself. Stay busy. "if it's meant to be it'll work out in the end".

[Marco Valerio]

Nothing is as it seems. Actions speak louder than words. If she hasn't come pounding down your door, ask yourself why. Why does she "miss you", but not act on it? No, it's NOT FAIR to let her toy with your emotions like that.

 

As for missing the quality time: there are lots of other people who will give you quality time, without ditching you.

 

Stay strong. You can do it.

 

Yeap....100% sure of it. Deeds, not good reasons, are love. If she really loves you...she will do much more than messages ¡¡¡

[KaliLove]

I am feeling a huge urge to send her a message... I don't know what she's feeling right now but I am feeling regret. I know she did bad things but now that she isn't responding my sense that I made a mistake is stronger than ever. I just want to gauge her feelings.

 

Are you thinking with your big head or your little head?

[BC1980]

I am feeling a huge urge to send her a message... I don't know what she's feeling right now but I am feeling regret. I know she did bad things but now that she isn't responding my sense that I made a mistake is stronger than ever. I just want to gauge her feelings.

 

Giving into the urge doesn't get you anywhere. It just piles on more sh*t for you to regret doing. Ask yourself what you honestly hope to gain from contacting her? What can she truly give you?

[somedude81]

I keep saying this over and over.

 

Lumo, what do you want?

 

Right now you are playing games with her by dumping her, then constantly trying to contact her.

 

Make up your mind.

[Medium.Lumo]

Are you thinking with your big head or your little head?

 

Neither.

 

With my heart :(

[Medium.Lumo]

I want her, but with more sweetness and less craziness/selfishness.

 

I keep saying this over and over.

 

Lumo, what do you want?

 

Right now you are playing games with her by dumping her, then constantly trying to contact her.

 

Make up your mind.

[somedude81]

I want her, but with more sweetness and less craziness/selfishness.

 

And what are you willing to do about it?

 

What action can you take?

[Medium.Lumo]

And what are you willing to do about it?

 

What action can you take?

 

Message her or call her and tell her? Thing is she is completely ignoring me now. I f'd up big time

[gaius]

Lol... I feel like this is something my ex would say... and while I'm a fellow Love-Shacker and "on your side"... I have to say something about this. I am definitely a sweet girl. I bake for people, I volunteer, I am ALWAYS told I'm super sweet. My ex said that this is why he was attracted to me. But I do have a fiesty side... which makes the sex amazing, but stirs my passions and intensity within a dating relationship... which means other things are intense as well... and well, I almost always end up being called "crazy", but really I'm just passionate.

 

I'm not excusing your ex, but I had to stick up for my fellow "lady in the streets, but a freak in the sheets" girls

 

As for her breadcrumbs... Everyone is different, meaning her breadcrumbs could be her way of reaching out to you, her way of wanting to have sex, or her way easing her guilt. No one really knows except her. But if you are really interested in meeting the sweet-to-the-core girl of your dreams, I would say just ignore the ex and move on... because the more that you continue anything with this ex-girlfriend... well, the more it will continue, ya know?

 

Good luck!

That combined with your taste in movies makes you sound perfect. =/ Girls with a touch of passion in their blood stay in your system for a long time.

 

Medium, I don't know why but for some reason girls don't seem to forget easily when you dump them. I guess they take it personally or something. I just hope you still decide to stick around here after all contact finally fizzles out with this one.

[somedude81]

BTW, has it dawned on anybody that Medium.Lumo is actually the one giving her breadcrumbs, and not the other way around as the title seems to suggest?

[KaliLove]

I want her, but with more sweetness and less craziness/selfishness.

 

Sorry, but you're out of luck on that. She's obviously not going to change, so you can either deal with her craziness/selfishness/nastiness/rapist tendencies (but for f*cks sake please do NOT allow her to touch your penis in front of children EVER again..I don't give a crap if you do bruise her when you push her off of you..that episode was SICK, not to mention illegal)/gold digging/and general inappropriateness, or you can find someone else who's not insane.

 

She was your first love. She's gonna stick in your head for a while. But that doesn't mean she's the right girl for you. Everyone needs to get their heart broken at least once before they settle down..and you're very young. You'll meet plenty of other women if you give yourself the chance.

 

Either way though, you have to quit whining about her. Either you want her, warts and all, or you don't. You CANNOT change her. You just can't. She doesn't want to change.

[Medium.Lumo]

While it was a horrible incident it wasn't actually "in front" of children, we were completely out of sight, what worried me was that we were supposed to be looking after them.

 

 

As for the rest of your post you're probably right but I can't think of it that way yet.

 

Sorry, but you're out of luck on that. She's obviously not going to change, so you can either deal with her craziness/selfishness/nastiness/rapist tendencies (but for f*cks sake please do NOT allow her to touch your penis in front of children EVER again..I don't give a crap if you do bruise her when you push her off of you..that episode was SICK, not to mention illegal)/gold digging/and general inappropriateness, or you can find someone else who's not insane.

 

She was your first love. She's gonna stick in your head for a while. But that doesn't mean she's the right girl for you. Everyone needs to get their heart broken at least once before they settle down..and you're very young. You'll meet plenty of other women if you give yourself the chance.

 

Either way though, you have to quit whining about her. Either you want her, warts and all, or you don't. You CANNOT change her. You just can't. She doesn't want to change.

[Medium.Lumo]

Seems like she's pissed. Complete NC

 

 

That combined with your taste in movies makes you sound perfect. =/ Girls with a touch of passion in their blood stay in your system for a long time.

 

Medium, I don't know why but for some reason girls don't seem to forget easily when you dump them. I guess they take it personally or something. I just hope you still decide to stick around here after all contact finally fizzles out with this one.

[somedude81]

Why do you think she's mad at you?

[whatdreamsmaycome]

Why do you think she's mad at you?

 

Probably because he dumped her and then kicked her out of his house. If I was her, I know I'd still be pissed about this for a bit. Just my personal opinion.

[KaliLove]

While it was a horrible incident it wasn't actually "in front" of children, we were completely out of sight, what worried me was that we were supposed to be looking after them.

 

 

As for the rest of your post you're probably right but I can't think of it that way yet.

 

Weren't they in the swimming pool with you when she raped you? How large was this pool that they couldn't see you at all?

 

If they couldn't see you, who was making sure they weren't drowning?

 

It was illegal either way..either they could have seen you and it was exposing yourselves to children, or they couldn't have seen you and it was reckless child endangerment. I guarantee you that if their parents knew what happened, you'd be banned from seeing them for life.

 

Either way, she's a sick pervert. Break ups suck for everyone but you know, deep down, that this girl is not right in the head. Pull it together junior!