Author Medium.Lumo Posted June 1, 2014 Author Share Posted June 1, 2014 It's big, and it's shaped so the two ends are separate. But yes I agree, it was reckless, and the fact is they were still in the pool with us, they might have come around the corner and seen us, but luckily they didn't. Well she's ignoring me so I don't think she wants to get back together anyway Weren't they in the swimming pool with you when she raped you? How large was this pool that they couldn't see you at all? If they couldn't see you, who was making sure they weren't drowning? It was illegal either way..either they could have seen you and it was exposing yourselves to children, or they couldn't have seen you and it was reckless child endangerment. I guarantee you that if their parents knew what happened, you'd be banned from seeing them for life. Either way, she's a sick pervert. Break ups suck for everyone but you know, deep down, that this girl is not right in the head. Pull it together junior! Link to post Share on other sites
Author Medium.Lumo Posted June 1, 2014 Author Share Posted June 1, 2014 Probably because he dumped her and then kicked her out of his house. If I was her, I know I'd still be pissed about this for a bit. Just my personal opinion. You're right she was the only girl on the planet kind enough to sleep with me and I just messed it up, and now there's nothing I can do because she has gone NC Link to post Share on other sites
Author Medium.Lumo Posted June 1, 2014 Author Share Posted June 1, 2014 I can't even sleep since she went NC. I feel sick and like this was all a huge mistake. Link to post Share on other sites
KaliLove Posted June 1, 2014 Share Posted June 1, 2014 "You're right she was the only girl on the planet kind enough to sleep with me and I just messed it up, and now there's nothing I can do because she has gone NC " This comment is creepy and reminiscent of the attitude of the kid who shot up UCSB recently. Are you just looking for sex or are you looking for a relationship? Stop being such a desperate drama queen. That's step number one in how to attract another (sane) woman. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Medium.Lumo Posted June 1, 2014 Author Share Posted June 1, 2014 I want both. And it's mean of you to say drama queen to someone going through a breakup. "You're right she was the only girl on the planet kind enough to sleep with me and I just messed it up, and now there's nothing I can do because she has gone NC " This comment is creepy and reminiscent of the attitude of the kid who shot up UCSB recently. Are you just looking for sex or are you looking for a relationship? Stop being such a desperate drama queen. That's step number one in how to attract another (sane) woman. Link to post Share on other sites
KaliLove Posted June 1, 2014 Share Posted June 1, 2014 You're right, that was mean. I apologize. I was reading about that kid Elliot Rodger who went insane and shot a bunch of people because nobody would have sex with him and your post sounded eerily reminiscent of some of the things he said right before he did it. But he had NPD and a God complex and I'm assuming you don't..hopefully.. You should stop focusing so much on sex though. Other women will eventually sleep with you. Sex is not a reason to stay in a bad relationship..women are more than just breasts and vaginas. Link to post Share on other sites
veggirl Posted June 1, 2014 Share Posted June 1, 2014 Probably because he dumped her and then kicked her out of his house. If I was her, I know I'd still be pissed about this for a bit. Just my personal opinion. Uh, she deserved both of those things. ML, she's not "no contact" with you. She's playing games and she's thrilled to know she has re-gained control. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
mickleb Posted June 1, 2014 Share Posted June 1, 2014 You're just panicking because for one brief moment you had a little power back. You think you'll be in control if you tell her you've made a mistake and ask for her back? Your dumping her was ballsy and you have gained a huge amount of respect in here because of it. If you want to have control of your life and feelings, take her NC as a gift. Focus on healing from this abusive relationship and becoming a healthy attractive guy for the next lady. P.S. Have you been to the gym today? Link to post Share on other sites
Author Medium.Lumo Posted June 1, 2014 Author Share Posted June 1, 2014 Apology accepted and with thanks. I'm not like that kid. I went through high school with no girlfriend and was the only one on the football team to not have a girlfriend. I also went through college with no girlfriend but lots of female friends. I never thought of hurting anyone because of it at all. The only girl I have asked for a date besides my now ex friend zoned me. So I have had terrible luck and I hope you can forgive me for worrying about a sex less rest of my life ! You're right, that was mean. I apologize. I was reading about that kid Elliot Rodger who went insane and shot a bunch of people because nobody would have sex with him and your post sounded eerily reminiscent of some of the things he said right before he did it. But he had NPD and a God complex and I'm assuming you don't..hopefully.. You should stop focusing so much on sex though. Other women will eventually sleep with you. Sex is not a reason to stay in a bad relationship..women are more than just breasts and vaginas. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Medium.Lumo Posted June 1, 2014 Author Share Posted June 1, 2014 It was more like a moment of madness! I just couldn't stand the way she was acting, thought of all the comments about her on here and reacted. Impulsive. Perhaps stupid. One day I had a girlfriend, now I just have an ex who's ignoring me. Maybe I just need to get through it and it was the right thing to do. Right now it feels terrible. Yes I do go to gym. Not today though. You're just panicking because for one brief moment you had a little power back. You think you'll be in control if you tell her you've made a mistake and ask for her back? Your dumping her was ballsy and you have gained a huge amount of respect in here because of it. If you want to have control of your life and feelings, take her NC as a gift. Focus on healing from this abusive relationship and becoming a healthy attractive guy for the next lady. P.S. Have you been to the gym today? Link to post Share on other sites
mickleb Posted June 1, 2014 Share Posted June 1, 2014 It was more like a moment of madness! I just couldn't stand the way she was acting, thought of all the comments about her on here and reacted. Impulsive. Perhaps stupid. One day I had a girlfriend, now I just have an ex who's ignoring me. Maybe I just need to get through it and it was the right thing to do. Right now it feels terrible. Yes I do go to gym. Not today though. No-one is surprised that it feels terrible but those who have experienced it before KNOW it will pass, and you will be stronger for not being a crazy lady's doormat. You will feel proud of yourself but you will have to experience this loss, fully, first. It is really hard. The pain is often physical, as well as emotional and mental. You will need to do your very best to keep yourself as healthy as possible, especially in the first month. But most people find that, after just three months, the worst is over. It's a rollercoaster but you will be better for riding it. Try to imagine it like giving up cigarettes. I don't smoke but I am aware that the cravings for the unhealthy habit, that quitters finally get the guts to kick, peaks in the first few days and weeks. After a few months, the cravings do start to subside. Yes, a whiff of a fag can set someone off a touch, but their logical brain begins to override that obsessive feeling, and they can overcome it. This woman, as tempting as she may seem, was a cancer stick for you. Dramatic, I know, but she was capable of causing you great harm. You have done something amazing and decided to quit. Congratulations! We know it won't be easy but we're here for you and you can get through this, one day at a time. And the addiction you're experiencing is actually easier to handle than a nicotine habit. Get in the gym 3 times a week, if you can. Eat some healthy and tasty food. Surround yourself with decent people as often as you can and do as many nice things for yourself as possible. Knuckle down and you will survive triumphant. You're now on a good path. Don't stray from it. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Medium.Lumo Posted June 2, 2014 Author Share Posted June 2, 2014 Thanks man. I felt a bit better for a while after reading your post, but now I'm pissed off... what if as has been suggested, she is playing games by ignoring me? I know the right thing to do is respond with my own NC, but this silence is really pushing my buttons! I want to start an OLD profile but I'm worried that in my current state of mind I will come off as desperate... No-one is surprised that it feels terrible but those who have experienced it before KNOW it will pass, and you will be stronger for not being a crazy lady's doormat. You will feel proud of yourself but you will have to experience this loss, fully, first. It is really hard. The pain is often physical, as well as emotional and mental. You will need to do your very best to keep yourself as healthy as possible, especially in the first month. But most people find that, after just three months, the worst is over. It's a rollercoaster but you will be better for riding it. Try to imagine it like giving up cigarettes. I don't smoke but I am aware that the cravings for the unhealthy habit, that quitters finally get the guts to kick, peaks in the first few days and weeks. After a few months, the cravings do start to subside. Yes, a whiff of a fag can set someone off a touch, but their logical brain begins to override that obsessive feeling, and they can overcome it. This woman, as tempting as she may seem, was a cancer stick for you. Dramatic, I know, but she was capable of causing you great harm. You have done something amazing and decided to quit. Congratulations! We know it won't be easy but we're here for you and you can get through this, one day at a time. And the addiction you're experiencing is actually easier to handle than a nicotine habit. Get in the gym 3 times a week, if you can. Eat some healthy and tasty food. Surround yourself with decent people as often as you can and do as many nice things for yourself as possible. Knuckle down and you will survive triumphant. You're now on a good path. Don't stray from it. Link to post Share on other sites
whatdreamsmaycome Posted June 2, 2014 Share Posted June 2, 2014 I think it's easy to feel like an ex is playing games, after all, we don't want to be tricked... it's self-preservation. But considering your scenario, I personally feel that she's trying to move on, too. She was dumped and then "pushed away"... I would feel some hesitancy too, even it was in between moments where my feelings came back. I don't know her, so I can't say exactly what she's thinking, but hopefully you will use this time to gain some confidence, because I would put money on it that you WILL indeed have another girlfriend and have sex again! But you have to take the first step... and unfortunately it's in the opposite direction of your ex. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Medium.Lumo Posted June 3, 2014 Author Share Posted June 3, 2014 She's killing me now... still NC I just feel like we have to at least meet up and talk about this. Link to post Share on other sites
smuggy95 Posted June 3, 2014 Share Posted June 3, 2014 the fact that you said she was 'kind enough to have sex with you' makes me think it must have been a horrible horrible love life, if all it was was 'charity sex'. This also makes me bet that you were afraid to upset her ever, because she held all the power to the only sex you'll ever have (not really, but this was the pedestal you put her on). If you treat girls that way, they will know you aren't being a full honest to god 100% human. You're just like a dog, waiting at the table, for crumbs of sex. So forget her. She doesn't hold the key to everything. You do. But you need to work on that confidence and do not put anyone on a pedestal like that. Read No more Mr Nice Guy. Link to post Share on other sites
somedude81 Posted June 3, 2014 Share Posted June 3, 2014 She's killing me now... still NC Dude, you dumped her. Why do you keep trying to talk to her? Link to post Share on other sites
Author Medium.Lumo Posted June 3, 2014 Author Share Posted June 3, 2014 Dude, you dumped her. Why do you keep trying to talk to her? Because I'm worried I made a huge mistake. Also, why are you taking her side over a fellow Loveshacker? Just curious... Link to post Share on other sites
somedude81 Posted June 3, 2014 Share Posted June 3, 2014 Because I'm worried I made a huge mistake. Also, why are you taking her side over a fellow Loveshacker? Just curious... Because my fellow Loveshacker has no flipping clue about what he wants. Right now, by continuing to try to talk to her after YOU dumped her, is giving her breadcrumbs and is completely rude. You are being a jerk to her. Dude, you need to figure out what you want. Until then, just leave her alone. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Medium.Lumo Posted June 3, 2014 Author Share Posted June 3, 2014 When you put it like that it does sound pathetic the fact that you said she was 'kind enough to have sex with you' makes me think it must have been a horrible horrible love life, if all it was was 'charity sex'. This also makes me bet that you were afraid to upset her ever, because she held all the power to the only sex you'll ever have (not really, but this was the pedestal you put her on). If you treat girls that way, they will know you aren't being a full honest to god 100% human. You're just like a dog, waiting at the table, for crumbs of sex. So forget her. She doesn't hold the key to everything. You do. But you need to work on that confidence and do not put anyone on a pedestal like that. Read No more Mr Nice Guy. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Medium.Lumo Posted June 3, 2014 Author Share Posted June 3, 2014 I didn't know it would be this difficult it's torture. Because my fellow Loveshacker has no flipping clue about what he wants. Right now, by continuing to try to talk to her after YOU dumped her, is giving her breadcrumbs and is completely rude. You are being a jerk to her. Dude, you need to figure out what you want. Until then, just leave her alone. Link to post Share on other sites
somedude81 Posted June 3, 2014 Share Posted June 3, 2014 I didn't know it would be this difficult it's torture. Try imagining how she is feeling. Most likely it's much worse than what you're dealing with. Link to post Share on other sites
KaliLove Posted June 3, 2014 Share Posted June 3, 2014 Yep..break ups suck. That doesn't mean it wasn't the right thing to do. Deep down you know that. Look back at all your own threads about this chick. You know she's crazy..you really do. You're just missing having a warm body next to you. As soon as you meet another girl, you'll realize how lucky you were to get out of this toxic relationship with your bank account and most of your dignity intact. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Medium.Lumo Posted June 3, 2014 Author Share Posted June 3, 2014 True... but not all the craziness was bad. She gave me a bj at a movie theater... how many girls would do that??? Yep..break ups suck. That doesn't mean it wasn't the right thing to do. Deep down you know that. Look back at all your own threads about this chick. You know she's crazy..you really do. You're just missing having a warm body next to you. As soon as you meet another girl, you'll realize how lucky you were to get out of this toxic relationship with your bank account and most of your dignity intact. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Medium.Lumo Posted June 3, 2014 Author Share Posted June 3, 2014 Try imagining how she is feeling. Most likely it's much worse than what you're dealing with. I can't even believe you just typed that. It's completely at odds with your views expressed before. You know as a girl she could replace me tomorrow if that's what she wanted. Link to post Share on other sites
Kizmet Fisher Posted June 3, 2014 Share Posted June 3, 2014 True... but not all the craziness was bad. She gave me a bj at a movie theater... how many girls would do that??? Alanis Morrissette. Link to post Share on other sites
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