Any guys like doing "women's" work?

[ja123]

You make a very excellent argument.

 

 

Now this I could live with:

 

 

You could try and reach a compromise. Maybe he cooks and you do the trash and maintenance, and you both share the cleaning and groceries?

 

 

I guess I'm additionally turned off from doing typical gal stuff because 1) not only do I prefer doing the guy stuff but, 2) the last LTR I had was with a struggling artist-momma's boy-type (emphasis on momma's boy) and not only did I work a job, but I did all the guy and gal stuff at home, including changing the sink faucets. He was worse than an infant because, at least with an infant, you know they'll grow up. I don't want to do that again!

[Els]

I guess I'm additionally turned off from doing typical gal stuff because 1) not only do I prefer doing the guy stuff but, 2) the last LTR I had was with a struggling artist-momma's boy-type (emphasis on momma's boy) and not only did I work a job, but I did all the guy and gal stuff at home, including changing the sink faucets. He was worse than an infant because, at least with an infant, you know they'll grow up. I don't want to do that again!

 

Eugh, that's awful! Definitely don't ever do that again.

[Haydn]

state what you want Ja. Loads of blokes are comfortable with this. I routinely whittle away the small hours cleaning the tines of my forks.

[MissBee]

Looking at my personality and preferences, I'd do best with a guy who likes to do the shopping, cooking, cleaning, etc.

 

 

I'd happily take out the garbage, mow the lawn, change the faucets, paint, etc.

 

 

I've tried to fit myself into what is typically expected of a woman, and I can do it but I find myself frustrated and irritated quite frankly.

 

 

I once had a male roommate and anyone looking at his stuff versus mine would have thought the gender roles were reversed.

 

 

The fact of the matter is, I hate clothes shopping, but could spend hours in a hardware store.

 

 

I'm also a big brush strokes kind of person who'd like to have someone who is more detail oriented and organized.

 

 

I'll be the leader and he'll be the administrator, in other words.

 

 

Would it be possible to mention this on an OLD profile?

 

 

Would I offend potential mates?

 

 

How is the best way to word this?

 

 

Does anyone know of the Myers Briggs type (or astrological sign! lol) for such a guy I seek?

 

Of course you can mention it in your OLD profile...it just depends on how. You can say casually that you're the kind of woman not into particular traditional roles and say you like painting, mowing the lawn etc. over taking out the garbage and don't at all mind a man who cooks and cleans.

 

I don't think you'd offend potential mates in saying it that way at all.

[Frank2thepoint]

@ Frank2thepoint Yeah, I'd be concerned to find a vain, prissy, nag (re: NYC men who are vain and like to decorate themselves). I'm not saying that I don't want a guy who can't change a tire. For me, it is a question of personal preference. I'm single, too, so I have to do all of it. It's just that I thought it would be nice to find someone who is complimentary. You talk about splitting the chores, but do you have a preference?

 

 

It's a good idea, like you say, just to give some examples on a profile. This might come off better than saying I want a guy who wants to do house chores. lol

 

From my perspective, there are a lot of women here that love having a metrosexual man in their life.

 

I don't have a preference for splitting chores, as long as the woman and I agree on our duties. So open communication about living together is needed. Even if we were to change up the duties on a weekly or monthly basis, because I may clean a little different than from a woman. I may pay extra attention to something that she may not and vice versa.

 

Yes giving some clear examples of what you want in a mate will be helpful in alleviating any miscommunication. Also, it doesn't hurt to mention compromise just in case, that way you don't come off rigid.

[Shepp]

@ Shepp A lot of masculine men not only love to cook, but are very good at it. Look at all the high-end chefs around the world? Most are men.

Its very true. I don't really find anything feminine about cooking to be honest, I love good food, I love providing for the people I love.

 

I guess if I were with someone like you, then we'd both need our own toolboxes! haha

Hahah sorted!

[Silly_Girl]

Well...It should be women's work, if he is the sole provider and she is the SAHW/M....

 

TFY

 

What are you talking about??

 

Plenty of women are the main/sole breadwinner. And regardless of who has what job(s) there'll always need to be a bit of a crossover. The home/child stuff doesn't start at 8 and end at 6.

[Silly_Girl]

 

@ SillyGirl and Targetlock It would be nice to not have labels, I suppose. I didn't really think of the implications when I started the thread. I was just looking for a thread title that would be succinct. How else could I have titled it?

 

Are you pulling my leg?

 

How about 'division of household responsibilities'?

[anne1707]

I'll be the leader and he'll be the administrator, in other words.

 

Based on the rest of your post, I am just hoping that you don't see "leading" as men's work whilst women get to do their admin

[Allumere]

I'm like you as I prefer the guy stuff. Spent last weekend with a jack hammer and several containers of hydraulic cement all by my lil girlie self I think for me it is some of the more physical demands and working with my hands that draws me in. When life is rough a day working outside whether it is landscaping or cutting pastures..well lets just say a lot of thinking gets done and the physical exhaustion makes for great sleeping. It is also an independence thing. I was raised to be self-sufficient and to be very honest, when you are single and money is tight you have no choice but to do as much as you can on your own. All that said, I can clean the heck out of a house, sew, and cook (love baking). For the simple fact that I am getting older, it would be nice to meet a gent that could help with those hardware store based projects..in fact that is something I usually ask on the first date.."Can you use a hammer?" but the past two gents I dated were more metro-sexual than Marlboro man and it worked out fine. They weren't opposed to doing those things, they just were not taught or they had the money to hire someone. Both could cook and loved grocery shopping so simply having someone to split duties with was awesome.

 

As far as what to say in an OLD profile, I wrote in mine "I can also use a socket wrench, paint, do minor home repairs and drive a tractor. Hey, you do what you have to right?!" I think if you sell it as qualities in terms or partnering and looking for that compliment of skills to your own it would be fine.

[carhill]

From living alone for many years, I came to view domestic duties as gender-neutral, even though I was socialized in a very gender-segregated family with a SAHM who wouldn't even allow me to make my own bed.

 

That's how I still view it, and this outlier (apparently) behavior is sometimes described by the wives of male friends when I'm 'helping out' at dinner parties, in a humorous but probably truthful way, as 'you'll make someone a good wife someday'. That's how the women of my generation view men who like or do 'women's work', apparently. Myself, I really don't care, as I like what I do and my life in general. Women I have no control over and they don't define me. Marriage was a wonderful teacher of life lessons. I recommend it!