xMM and boyfriend in bar brawl, started by the wife.

[AmyBamy]

Wrong again, I have maintained NC and if u had read my previous statement u would know that they didn't go to that partial bar until after d-day, also I would like to point out that BS has many times in the past attempted to break NC by going to places she knew I would be, for instance last year we had a kids sports event and she attended it even though her kids were not participating, there was to be a small party for the kids afterwards and she went along with her sister and her sisters kids. She did not need to be there and she knew I would be there. Anyway i asked my xH that if he would continue at their party while I went home.

 

Maybe going to the bar was a bad idea but after so long and not knowing if she would ever be there I decided to go ahead. It was a mistake but I will not, will not hide away any longer. She has to come to terms that I also live here.

 

You have every right to be wherever you want to be without being harassed, attacked, threatened, etc. Everyone knows this, although some try to justify and give excuses for her behavior. Call the police - they know right and wrong and I guarantee you that you aren't wrong here. THe police will give you the very black and white right and wrong and you did nothing wrong, she did.

 

I wouldn't baby her any more. She's had years to get a handle on her strong emotions (I can't stop rolling my eyes). She forgave him and chooses to be with him, and she can't handle seeing you there? That is ridiculously pathetic.

[Ailsa1983]

Sounds like a wise and balanced choice to me. Kudos.

 

It's also possible that the couple will decide not to frequent that place of their own volition. Perhaps it will become 'yours' again.

 

I don't think you need to continue to feel ashamed. If you keep making decisions you can be proud of, your pride will and should return.

 

Thanks Betrayed

 

I will most likely feel ashamed of my actions for a long time, these are the consequences.

 

I'm not bothered about the bar really, it's any function from now on (and we have a few here throughout the year). She does not need to attend many of them as her kids are now in higher education but she went to everyone last summer and I suspect she will attend them this summer. I'm afraid that this will have to be as I will be attending as my children are now in the midst of the functions.