Ruudrocks Posted May 31, 2014 Share Posted May 31, 2014 (edited) Just a disclaimer that these are my own preferences and I'm in no way saying they're right or wrong. In fact I know they come across as shallow but please just accept them and help me with them! Some background, I'm a reasonably mature 21 year old Asian guy who prefers dating Asian girls. Relationship wise though I'm less mature since I'm just out of a relationship with my first girlfriend. So before I dated my ex, who was my first girlfriend, I preferred girls who were slimmer and I didn't mind if they had smaller boobs. In fact, my first love had A cup boobs and I didn't care. But my ex was a very curvy Asian girl with 36c boobs. Body aside, she was pretty and charming and smart: everything I had wanted in a girl. We were in love and lived together for 5 months (been together for 7) and even talked about marriage. I won't go into the details, we had been arguing for months, but she broke up with me acrimoniously by text last week because I argued with her as she was under tremendous pressure and about to take her law school tests. I was devastated and she still hasn't replied me yet. I think we will end up talking but that might not be till September when school starts again. In the meantime I'm left wondering if I will find another girl like her: we had an amazing sex life and I really enjoyed her breasts and butt. She has converted me completely into being super into curvy and busty women. I do want her back but that might not be possible. My main problem with moving on is that I won't be able to find another suitable girl I like with at least decently large boobs (large b or c). I know I sound ridiculously shallow but this is one thing I'm genuinely worried about because the physical chemistry we had was so good that I worry the next girl I date won't match up since I really value the importance of physical chemistry in a relationship. Can someone tell me if this is just a phase and me being incredibly shallow or are my warped standards something I will just have to live with? Edited May 31, 2014 by a LoveShack.org Moderator Link to post Share on other sites
km19 Posted May 31, 2014 Share Posted May 31, 2014 (edited) The big thing here is that this was your first relationship. You only know the way she is. Regardless, you have to go into a new relationship with a completely open mind. You cannot try to find someone that essentially replaces her. This is also coming from someone in the same boat as you. Fresh out of my first relationship (6+ years) and still think of her physical features that I loved. Yet before her, I had really no expectations or preferences. That's how you have to be when you enter your next relationship. It's still something I'm working on myself. Once you stop looking for someone to replace her or directly compare a girl to your ex you will be ready for a new relationship. Edited May 31, 2014 by km19 3 Link to post Share on other sites
FredJones80 Posted May 31, 2014 Share Posted May 31, 2014 Glad to see you're cut up about the loss of the relationship then 5 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Ruudrocks Posted May 31, 2014 Author Share Posted May 31, 2014 Is that even going to be possible? Given the huge impact that she's had. I'm at the stage where I feel like it's impossible to not compare: even if she's not my first it would be really natural to compare :/ Link to post Share on other sites
somedude81 Posted May 31, 2014 Share Posted May 31, 2014 OK, let me get this straight. You are worried that unless your next girl has a similar body type to your ex, that you won't be satisfied. Is that it? Link to post Share on other sites
CarrieT Posted May 31, 2014 Share Posted May 31, 2014 I'm at the stage where I feel like it's impossible to not compare You aren't ready to start dating or another relationship until you get to a stage where you will NOT COMPARE. Until then, it will only be a rebound relationship. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
km19 Posted May 31, 2014 Share Posted May 31, 2014 Is that even going to be possible? Given the huge impact that she's had. I'm at the stage where I feel like it's impossible to not compare: even if she's not my first it would be really natural to compare :/ How long ago was your breakup? Regardless, you said yourself prior to dating your ex you preferred a different type of girl, yet still dated your ex, who then changed your preferences. That alone should be enough motivation to not disregard women who don't meet the same physical type as your ex 3 Link to post Share on other sites
Itspointless Posted May 31, 2014 Share Posted May 31, 2014 I know I sound ridiculously shallow No. not at all But I would be sure to tell her that you will miss her boobs and butt, perhaps she will change her mind. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
KaliLove Posted May 31, 2014 Share Posted May 31, 2014 Yup. You're the only guy on earth who likes chicks with big boobs. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Ruudrocks Posted June 1, 2014 Author Share Posted June 1, 2014 It's not that.,, I really do love her. I thought I was gonna spend the rest of my life with her, but cheating was involved. I don't want to go into the details of that because it still hurts me and it's recent: maybe 2 months ago. But we worked on our relationship afterwards and went on till last week when we had an argument by text and she dumped me (we are halfway across the world from each other since it was summer break) I'm just looking for constructive responses. I am trying to get over her and one of the worries I have is that I won't get over her body and our amazing sexual chemistry Link to post Share on other sites
bulldogz Posted June 1, 2014 Share Posted June 1, 2014 Brother, if what you miss most is the boobs and booty, I think you're in a much better place that some people on this forum, who miss much more than four mountains of love. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Ruudrocks Posted June 1, 2014 Author Share Posted June 1, 2014 It's not what I miss most. We just had so so many similar interests I'm just trying to put myself in a frame of mind where there's gonna be someone out there who can be better than her in all aspects But the sex life and how much I enjoyed her body ( we had sex at least 150 times in 7 months) just makes me feel like I can't do better in that one aspect, It's not that I don't miss her. Link to post Share on other sites
Bito Posted June 1, 2014 Share Posted June 1, 2014 I can relate. My ex had a rocking body with a very high sex drive. I enjoyed spending time with her as well but it's safe to say that is what I miss most. Being with her made me feel so loved and adorned. This might make me sound shallow but sex is an important part to any relationship. Unfortunately it will not be the same with anyone else. That's also what's so great about love. Each person is different and will make you feel good and bad in different ways. You might think that only someone like her can make you happy but that's not true. Let some other girl surprise you. Body type preferences evolves based on your surroundings. Link to post Share on other sites
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